Crazy allergy policy or AIBU?

[Smarshian]

Booked a party for DD. All good. Friend has significant food allergies and usually brings her own.
Called the centre to inform and they have introduced a new policy that no food can be brought in from outside. No exceptions. They can’t cater for her (I don’t think - although am checking), and mum would rather she brought her own as safer for her.
I queried the policy and they said it was to stop cross contamination to others. They had had an incident and updated policy. Assume it was a child who had eaten nuts on the premises and had a reaction from what I was told.
This means if we can’t find anything that mum and child are comfortable with that she will have to sit and watch all the friends eat without her.
surely this policy hurts the allergy sufferers more?!
Ridiculous policy or AIBU?

@ColleenDonaghy I'm a chef. They can prevent all of those and prevent cross contamination.
They shouldn't be contaminating anything in the kitchen

They could. But won’t change their process/ accommodate.

@CormorantStrikesBack I can't speak for chains . But the restaurants I've worked in will guarantee no gluten contamination

In the worst cases they've been prosecuted for manslaughter.

That's why they are taking this approach.

In fairness she’s never been contaminated. I assume chain places have a policy of arse covering hence the speech.

But if you're talking soft play cafe and chips or nugget batter contain milk then that means the oil is contaminated and so all of the fried food (I've typical party food!) is off limits, and then if they use butter they may not be able to guarantee anything about the non fried food either.

It is possible to guarantee no cross contamination but many places won't take the risk.

Saying that we have left numerous places with gluten free options on the menu without eating as I always quiz them on cross contamination. The amount of places which use the same butter, pizza places which put gf pizzas on the base of the pizza oven with gluten pizzas, etc is unreal. Chefs have said heat kills the gluten!

@CormorantStrikesBack I totally get that.
My old place had a separate small fryer, oven fridge and prep area

Your child surely already knows that their allergies will make it more difficult for them when eating out? If not, explain it to them, it is presumably something that they will need to deal with again.

I think there is no way they are going to be fund to be discriminatory on this. Their argument that they need to avoid cross contamination is likely to be deemed a proportional means to achieve a legitimate aim.

It’s not my child.
Not allowing outside food is fine if you can avoid cross contamination and provide inside the venue but saying no to both is bonkers in my opinion.

In my experience chain restaurants are often better than independents as they have chain-wide recipes and policies. Zizzi is one of our preferred places as they usually have more than one choice for DS. It may not be haute cuisine but I've been to branches all over the country and have always got the impression that the staff have been trained and are actually listening so we feel safe. I can't say the same for even some quite up market independent places we've been in.
I think most places can cater for allergies but some just don't want to even if you give them plenty of notice. Which is fine - we just take our money elsewhere. It's more difficult if it's an event where everyone is having the same thing or there is a limited menu, and buffets are a bit of a nightmare from the cross contamination point of view so I usually have something in my bag in such circumstances. I don't usually bother asking and I don't think anyone has ever noticed. If everyone has a plate of sandwiches and cocktail sausages I don't think anyone's going to notice one person with different sandwiches!

We have a soft play that says no food. We have severe allergies so always take our food. Nobody has ever even noticed. We have less allergens than those in the food these so no additional risk for anyone. If you ask they say no though, so we just don't anymore.

You’re probably right that I shouldn’t have asked! It just never occurred to me that it would be an issue.
We went to a party at this venue a month ago and a child brought their own but apparently it’s a new policy.

I agree with others they can either cater for you or allow food to be brought in.

It's sounding very discriminatory to say you can't cater to the child and they can't bring in food they can safely eat.

Are they letting you take your own birthday cake or party bags on site?

Severe allergies in my family.

I hate to say it as we struggle so much with it all - but as a business owner, I do see the logic.

I can see the logic of the venue a bit. Say a child who is allergic to peanuts, brings their own food, the venue does not know the ingredients and it could contaminate someone with a severe dairy or egg allergy. Far fetched of course but at least the venue can say to the milk/egg child what is and is not in every piece of food.

I mean what if a child has an allergic reaction to smeared foods and the venue is blamed when it was not their food even causing it?

But I would hazard it might just be to stop general good preferences (not allergies) from being brought in and it gets out of hand.

Right but a severe or anaphylactic reaction to a trace of an allergen is totally different to the symptoms of a trace of gluten, however unpleasant.

I get the logic but only if they can offer something themselves that is allergen free.
Child could as easily (or more) touch a smear of food from the venue they are allergic to.
It is severe allergies (anaphylaxis)

I do not see why carrot sticks and grapes, things that are whole foods not with ingredients- why can’t the venue provide this I wonder ?

Probably prepared too close to other allergens. And it’s not a meal anyway so a poor offering like that is likely to result in further complaint.

That's been the case in most of the north london child friendly venues for as long as I can remember, they make their money off the food and if people start bring food in they don't make as much, if they make an exception then someone else complains.

Leave it up to them, they either cater for them or they don't and you bring stuff.

Right, good point but allergies are getting more common due to many environmental factors and it is getting passed via dna now.

You can wash fruit and veg and
prepare it with disposable cutters and plate, 2 minute job.

There are adults with severe allergies and there are going to be more and more. An offer of something is better than nothing.

I can't see the logic in their policy (from an allergy perspective). A child with known allergies who cannot eat any of the food served there is not allowed to bring their own food in case another child is allergic to some of it, but the first child isn't considered at risk of cross contamination from the known presence of their allergens.

I think the venue either needs to offer prepackaged food for people with allergies or allow people to bring their own food. Possibly charging a plating fee to discourage people bringing in food for preference reasons if profit is the driving factor.

Although if profit is the driving factor the venue should think how it can better accommodate children with allergies as they have birthdays too...

I can't see the logic in their policy (from an allergy perspective). A child with known allergies who cannot eat any of the food served there is not allowed to bring their own food in case another child is allergic to some of it, but the first child isn't considered at risk of cross contamination from the known presence of their allergens.
I'm somewhat confused by this too.
So there is a real child with definite allergies who is going into an environment where the staff will be knowingly serving food that contains that child's allergens and that's ok, but it's too dangerous for that child to bring in their own food, which is probably relatively hypoallergenic anyway, in case there is a hypothetical child who is allergic to something in the allergic child's food but not in the venue's own offerings? The probability of that seems very low.
Not to mention the fact that of all the parents out there, the one who is probably least likely to allow their child to share food or leave food residue on surfaces is the parent of a multi allergic child. In all likelihood the parent of this young child will be watching her like a hawk in an environment of this nature, and so would the parent of any other child who happened to be in the venue and had allergies so severe that this type of exposure would be dangerous.
I don't think the venue has really thought this through at all, they just don't want to be bothered.

I fully accept gluten will not kill dd. My point though would be that if they can’t guarantee no contamination for gluten then they’re also not guaranteeing it for other allergens inc potentially fatal ones. So yes if dd had a severe anaphylaxis allergy I’d be even more worried.

saying that I would class dd’s reaction to gluten to be severe. She will start projectile vomiting within minutes. She then staggers around looking drunk, totally incoherent. She then physically collapses. The one time she was glutened eating out I had to carry her out the restaurant. She carries on vomiting and diahorrhea for two days and struggles to get out of bed for a week. So while she’s not going to die it’s quite severe.

plus the long term risk that every exposure increases the risk of cancer