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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think people only want to help when it's too late?

31 replies

namechanged789123 · 13/12/2023 10:01

I feel mentally broken to be quite honest. The exhaustion is unbearable, I'm feeling unwell and also heavily pregnant. Haven't slept for days due to young DC that just refuse to sleep a whole night through. I don't know how much more of it I can take.

I have a partner. He works full time as well as me, in a job which is not really flexible and is long hours. This is a discussion we've had but he believes he can't change much about it at the moment. I feel he's being quite unsupportive but that's a whole other matter. It's me who has to get up and do the school runs every single time I've been unwell and barely slept.

All I want is a full nights sleep and some time to myself. I'm afraid to ask for help for fear of being judged. I feel the expectation on me as a mum is to just get on with it. Which I have been doing, but I feel like I've gotten to the point where I physically cannot.

My mum is aware of how I'm feeling also but has not offered to help. My partner should be helping more, I know he should but I just can't get him to see it from my point of view.

I'm starting to feel desperate. Please is there anybody on here who could give me some advice?

OP posts:
namechanged789123 · 13/12/2023 11:14

Partner is working at the weekend as well so no chance of any sort of rest for me. I know I need a break before then though or I just simply won't be able to function. Being ill is not helping matters, twice now I've suffered with a chest infection during pregnancy. It's one thing after another

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 13/12/2023 11:17

namechanged789123 · 13/12/2023 11:14

Partner is working at the weekend as well so no chance of any sort of rest for me. I know I need a break before then though or I just simply won't be able to function. Being ill is not helping matters, twice now I've suffered with a chest infection during pregnancy. It's one thing after another

So he works 7 days a week and long days? Does he intend to actually see this child?

Book a sick day. Send big one to nursery. Sleep. You're ill. Go on mat leave early. Sleep.

urchin33 · 13/12/2023 11:18

In the short term, can you call in sick to work and give yourself a couple of days to recover and sleep in the day?

mantyzer · 13/12/2023 11:20

I am so sorry you are going through this.
I think a lot of people won't help if a partner/husband is not helping.

mantyzer · 13/12/2023 11:21

I agree phone in sick and put other child in nursery.
Do not do housework for your partner like cooking meals. Focus on yourself.

ShirleyPhallus · 13/12/2023 11:29

I agree, phone in sick or take some holiday days. Then crisis chats with your husband. This cannot go on.

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