I’m ready to give up on life because nobody is taking this seriously

[tiredandgrumpyy]

I am sorry to post again. No pictures this time, I promise.

Most of those reading will know the story, heavy rectal bleeding, prolapse and abdominal pain.

Admitted last Tuesday, discharged last Friday morning. Admitted again Saturday night.

The Sunday morning I saw a surgeon on the ward and they were really dismissive of me and I ended up sobbing. They discharged me after telling me they would fast track me to the colorectal surgeons because “no one will see you now, it’s a Sunday, do you expect a colorectal surgeon to see you now? what do you want me to do, call them up and tell them they need to get to work?” when I said I don’t feel well enough to go home he said “stay in then, I don’t know what you want me to do about it” rolling his eyes at his team, and walked off.

I stayed at home yesterday despite bleeding all day. Last night at around 2am, I woke up to go to the toilet again as it’s been non stop diarrhoea, and became so dizzy I collapsed and fell face first on the hard corner of the sofa, my nose and head is bruised.

Today has been hell. I have been on the toilet non stop, this morning it was just blood which wouldn’t stop even after going to the toilet. I don’t even know how many times I’ve been to the toilet with diarrhoea too.

I called the number for the colorectal department today and the secretary has said I’ve been referred for an appointment but it’s marked as ‘non urgent’ so it’ll be at least a 6-12 month wait to be seen. She hung up the phone when I got upset.

At 6:30pm I went to the toilet and I have bled for one hour straight. It’s dark, thick blood. I’d estimate around a mug - 1.5 of just blood, which continued in my underwear for 15 minutes after.

Today in total I would estimate about 2-2.5 mugs of blood.

I became so dizzy and couldn’t walk properly without being all over the place.

My partner has taken me to A&E, I was seen straight away and I’m waiting for bloods and I’m on a trolley. My blood pressure was high, not low, my heart rate was 125 but oxygen levels fine. Tummy is cramping and head really hurting.

Im so scared to be here. I have no one here with me as usual. My mum is very dismissive so wouldn’t come with me and my partner is at home with our DS.

I feel like a nuisance and I already want to cry because they must be sick of me by now. I don’t want to be seen as that ‘hypochondriac’ but it’s my only option because my GP always advises it’s A&E I need and not them.

Over the last two months I have lost £6,000 in monthly recurring revenue and I spend my life on the sofa or on the toilet. I am becoming so heavily depressed because I need help.

I don’t have friends nearby because I’ve recently moved. I have no one to be here to advocate for me and I become so nervous now that I struggle to talk without blubbering.

Please, I need help tonight, if anyone has any wide words on how I can best advocate myself, how I get them to listen, what I can say to make them listen, I would so appreciate it.

I am no longer coping and am at a point where I no longer want to be here.

I’m so sorry to post again. At this point it’s one of my only outlets and I don’t know where else to turn.

OP request a chaperone when you are speaking with a doctor or nurse, this at least means you have somebody else there (an independent person) who heard all dialogue from both sides and can advocate for you if and when they are being unreasonable.

If you have photographic evidence of anything at all, show them. Make sure they are seeing the full picture, force them to see the entire picture.

Ask for them to put any decisions they make in writing- signed.

If you've bled 2.5 mug fulls of blood you need to take that in a bowl with you

I have no idea why you're being treated as if you're a malingerer - absolutely disgusting

You're not in South Yorkshire are you OP? If you are say so and I'll be over in a flash.

Don't let them discharge you, inpatients get to the top of the queue and you need to be seen. Complain to PALS. If your dh comes in to visit tomorrow get him to bring a notepad and pen with him. Then every time you see a doctor make them summarise what they are telling you in writing with their name, time and date. .each and every time. You will find that people become much more careful about what they tell you when they have to agree a written signed account.

Gosh this sounds so hard. I remember your post from a while ago.

I am wishing you strength and perseverance. I hope they will listen to you.

We are here for you.

How would you feel about directing then to this post? Or writing how you're doing done and passing it to them?

I’m so sorry this is happening to you. It sounds awful. But you are in the right place. All the love and best wishes to you xx

I don’t know what to say. If you’re not an urgent case, then I don’t know what is. You do sound very poorly. I hope they take you seriously this time. ❤️

Jeez that is horrific. I'm sorry this is happening. Could you fund a private consultation? Not that you should haveto of course. Then maybe they could fast track you to NHS if they found something? I don't understand why a colorectal surgeon could not see you in A and E? That happened to me twice the summer before last and one time resulted in surgery. I am so sorry, we are all thinking of you and hope for a positive resolution

You have my deepest sympathy.
Ask to see the notes that are being written up currently, this is an urgent matter, while I understand that you're exhausted, anything that appears to minimise or dismiss your symptoms or level of suffering needs to be challenged.
Your care has been below an acceptable standard, refer those attending to you to your earlier visits, I know from painful personal experience that medics seek to treat patients on the basis that they have no prior medical issues.
Good luck, we are rooting for you.

How horrific.
Do you feel you can say where you are in case a mumsnetter nearby can come advocate for you?

OP I've see your pervious posts and I am so sorry you are being treated like this - or more accurately - not treated.

Can you try a different hospital?

Failing that, my only other suggestion is to pay for a consultation with a private colorectal surgeon, get their letter and take it to A&E with you. Better still, see one who you know also practises within the NHS and they may be able to make some NHS inroads for you. I had to do this for my daughter when no one would listen to me. The private Dr didn't tell them anything I hadn't already. They just listened to HIM because HE wasn't a "first-time mum." Absolutely disgusting. You have to play the game, unfortunately.

Again, I am so so sorry.

This is absolutely horrendous. In the nicest possible way I am amazed you’re not dead OP - you need that treatment and operation…
No advice, just lots of prayers and my deepest sympathy. Can’t imagine why your mother is being so cruel. She could at least take your child so your boyfriend can be with you.

OP I have no words to help you apart from I’ve been in similar situation, I had a septic miscarriage and lost 1500 mls of blood in my home all over my floor, went in by ambulance and was discharged the same day with one yes one tablet. I then went on to lose another 1500 and very nearly was not here. I really hope they take this seriously, although I have no faith in the NHS any longer. As PP said if they discharge you and any more blood dial 999 they will have to send and ambulance, I also know if u have been admitted more than twice, they have to keep you in, well that’s what the paramedics told me. Might be different areas. Sending love

Was supposed to say iron tablet

I'm so upset reading this.
What trust is it / hospital ?
Please PM me if you don't want to say.

Let's then look at the trust policies , it is outrageous you are being treated
Like this. It must be terrifying. I'd like to help you compose something ?

This is def not NICE guidelines. I'm
Training to be an Occupational Therapist and for my NHS placement I've had to complete about 14 hours of statutory training from Equality Act, Fire and HOURS on how people Should be treated. All of your examples goes against this.

I'm wondering g if there is another hospital near you to try instead ? Cultures do get set in certain hospitals which can lead to scandals and I've received training on this too as it happens.

Id like to try and help you if I can x

Another poster who was horrified at your treatment in your earlier post. Lots of us here just wishing we could do something practical to help. Saying whereabout you are might get someone to you.

I don't know if you've already been doing this and you have just had the misfortune to be dealing with a bunch of morons but I would stick to relaying the facts specifically how much blood you are using and try to avoid getting emotional.

What tests have they ordered or done? I’d have thought a CT scan and colonoscopy and or sigmoidoscopy would be the minimum. Tell them you can no longer manage at home, and that you need a diagnosis. This is happening for a reason. I do find the colorectal team at my local hospital (I wonder if it’s the same one), a chauvinistic lot and I had to virtually beg to be admitted last year following weeks of illness. I was diagnosed with diverticulitis but it I was sent home twice first before a week long admission. Tell them in no uncertain terms that you will not be leaving this time without tests and a diagnosis.

Dreadful. You'd get seen on a Sunday if you were a dog. Can you keep the blood as they can see it?

Every time you have diarrhea or bless from your rectum get as much as possible in to the bed pan and show them every single time.
take photos etc. this is really really concerning that they are not taking you seriously. And this is from an nhs professional.

Oh op I feel for you, there is a lot of support on here and hands to hold we're all thinking of you keep us updated

Don’t know why some people train as doctors.
Disgusting treatment.
Can only suggest you demand PALS and tell them to bring a lawyer as you’ll need the name for yours ( only thing I’ve found that works) Start talking legal action and that might work.
Can you post which health trust it is?

This all sounds terrible, Op. I am sorry that you have been treated so badly. Hopefully you will now be taken seriously

Yes, what hospital are you in? Maybe somebody knows somebody.

Thank you for all the advice. Just spoken to a nurse and she said people are being seen in time order unless it’s critical and that it’ll be hours to wait to be seen.

im on the toilet in A&E bleeding now but no bedpan I didn’t even think.

im in Sussex, can’t find anything on NICE because im not sure what I’m looking for, all I can see is about hemmoiroids