To ask is it possible to have a good , by choice frugal life - anyone done it ?

[Ohmahgaws]

i do not meannto be insensitive re col .. it has affected us too and the below decision s.

Dh and I are early 60 s.
We both worked after graduating in public services jobs , which we loved .

When we hit our late 50s .. we decided to give up our careers and now we both do cleaning jobs for minimum wage x2 days a week .

We have occupational pensions. As I worked pt after dc born , mine is £ 480 pm and dh is 1.5 k .

We downsized and went to live in the country in a small house.
We did so in the basis that if we did not like it , we would move back to our old city which we also loved . So far , we love it 4 years in .

we live very simply and mostly soend our money on going out to local gigs and drinking as well as we help dc out when we can .

dh looks ten years younger .

I feel bad sometimes that we are not working in those high pressure jobs we did before and that we have gone from a joint income of 73k to less , between us, than a full time minimum wage job as it means that we are not building income and cannot pass it on to dc .

i also miss - occasionally.. going out for meals , holidays abroad . .. we need to be mindful of our income at all times really . And missing spluging occasionally ! I also kind of miss saving . .. the ability to do so ( we have 30k and no mortgage .. and it womt be increasing)

has anyone else made this lifestyle choice - i mean as a actual choice - to live simpler no holidays abroad etc and if so have you found it sustainable in the long term?

I have chosen a small low stress job over my initial high stress one. I am pretty poor tbh but don't hate it. I know I'd rather be not well off than giving most of my life at work and home.worrrying about work.
Sure, I'd like money to the point I don't have to worry when my car breaks down. But I simply do not care enough to be career driven.

My DH and I have this discussion, I'd quite like to step down and do something different but less well paid, he's happy working. His view is we should earn as much as possible now, mid 50s and on into our mid 60s, so we can really enjoy retirement. I'd like some time to enjoy life while I'm fit and healthy...

You’ve got a point, what if you don’t get that far!

I think the problem is that most younger people are going to be frugal by choice, because even with a £3K income, a huge amount of that is going to go on housing and possibly childcare.

Its housing thats the massive issue here - either rocketing mortgages or sky high rentals - that is the biggest problem facing most people.

So if you are in a position where you dont have those overheads - by whichever means - plus you have a 'fallback income' of private pensions (which ob came from working well in previous times) then any talk of frugality is kind of irrelevent to a great many people.

I suspect more its the feeling that you 'should' be doing more work, because doing work is drummed into people until they drop, so taking a step back is often seen as lazy or can make them feel guilty. But why? you did well - you worked hard, you invested in property at a good time, and downsized to reduce outgoings. Its OK to enjoy a life away from high pressure, but I wonder if you are left with some residual guilt from previously having been working more.

Enjoy it. You get one life.

Yes, I have done similar except for moving. I'm retired from work on a very small income. I could get a p/t job to boost my income but I don't want to.
I've never earned much, so am used to having no spare money. I spend a lot of time at home, and I'm quite good at finding free/cheap things to do if I want to go out.
If I were a more sociable person I'd probably hate this lifestyle but it suits me fine.

I have a significaht state pension short fall . I need to pay 3k +!to top it up . Ive worked out that to get that amount back I have to live till i am 75!( the amount extra i wd get into pension from state would take that many years to get the 3k back via increased payments )

Why did you give up the jobs you love? Agree with other posters,£3k a month isn't frugal. We moved, cheaper area to be near the sea and country. Edge of a village. I gave my notice in to retire, (I had a round trip commute by road of just over 100 miles) I was in my 60s, a week after sending the paperwork (I had got a job in 2 local hospitals,temporary workforce,was going to do patt time days,DH came home told me his company had liquidated on the spot. I rescinded my retirement ,Surrey hospital, London weighting,high cost living allowance, night rate. He had a nervous breakdown, partly caused by the local jobcentre.said he wasn't crawling down there to be treated like scum for £72 a week. I kept us going on my wages for a year (then he got a job) frugal...no hair cut for 18 months, everything cut to the bone. I have a small 12 years NHS pension. He's 7 years younger than me,so wasn't pension age, when he fell walking the dogs 3 years ago,had to stop working,no benefits because of my pensions. We downsized,2 bed bungalow,last holiday 15 years ago,we go out normally once a month to a carvery. Shop mainly in Lidl. Pension lump sum spent on solar panels. All doors and windows replaced while we were working. Frugal,hell yeah, happy with this yes. I have a disabled son I'm carer for,we have ended up helping out the DKs 4 of them with money this year.

But your incomes must still be substantially more than your outgoings. So why are you living frugally? What does your money actually go on cos it sounds like you're pissing it up the wall frankly!

If you were my parents, I’d just want you to be happy and healthy. Don’t feel guilty just be happy! I love gardening. I’d choose it over an exotic holiday,

Can you clarify where your 3.4k goes each month? I’m baffled that you are living frugally on that amount with no housing or childcare costs tbh

There's a very interesting older American lady on tiktok, Laura Oldanie, who makes videos about living well and ethically within a capitalist society, and she seems to have nailed it. She does a lot of foraging, growing her own stuff and spends a lot of time doing volunteering, with the idea of making her life, and others', more meaningful, whilst minimising interaction with capitalism.

She certainly manages to make it look appealing, but obviously that's easier for, say, an older person in America who could have, without being especially well off, afforded a fairly spacious house, with garden etc. Harder in the UK!

That's unlikely to be correct as each year you buy represents £302 and the usual ROI is 2.6 years

You probably will live until you're 75 OP (unless you're in poor health). Life expectancy in the UK is around 83 for women.

I haven't RTFT. Sorry if repeating.
You seem to be stuck in a Monday-to-Friday / 9 to 5 mindset. You can earn chunks of supplementary money doing one-off jobs like Christmas working patterns eg hospitality or retail (added bonus: you will be out of the house and using somebody else's heating) or summer / Bank Holiday / weekend festivals (added bonus: you can work when others need to be taking school-holiday-scheduled breaks, which leaves you free to take breaks at cheaper times).

What would you like to save for? Just to give money to your children? Don't. It's your life and they are able-bodied adults. I would dread to think that my 65 y/o mother is working beyond her capabilities so that she could save money for me.
Providing you have enough money to do things you want to do, you should work as much or as little as you fancy. Especially if your husband is on board with the lifestyle.

I don't like the word "frugal" it smacks of the Workhouse.
Besides, you are not living frugally- not with regular drinking!
I have lived carefully, but now am spending more- with IHT so much will go to the government which will waste it.
You sound comfortable and happy- that's the main thing.

I honestly laugh when I hear some people's definition of frugal.
Living frugally for me is as much about not wasting/overconsuming as spending less money, but your post has been another kick up the bum for me in terms of getting back into my more frugal ways!

You have more than us coming in a couple and 4 children yet can't do any of those things so your money is going somewhere?? I'm a sahm to 4 young ones, hubby works, we have one new car one old all paid for and all bills paid up to date and no debt yet are able to go holidays,eat out etc obviously within what budget we have

So by choice I suppose (I divorced H of 35 years) I will be alone on state pension with occupational pension of around £250 a month (just enough to mean I can't get any pension credit etc!). I will have to retire around 70 as I need to pay off mortgage first. I might try to work beyond that but I'm 62 now and struggling to work 3 days a week. Have to wait and see.

You've got two pensions, 2 part time jobs AND state pensions to come?! I wouldn't exactly call that frugal.