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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think it is irresponsible to give an eight-year-old a pen knife

91 replies

OlgaRhythm · 11/12/2023 20:36

Need views on whether I am being too precious here. Family member has gifted DC a pen knife for Xmas. On no planet would I trust them with it until they were much older. I'm just in disbelief that someone could be so daft. AIBU?

OP posts:

DollyDaydreamW · 11/12/2023 21:51

My son is the same age and he has his own drills, proper sharp saws, hammers, a box cutter type knife etc. He also uses sharp knives for cooking and slicing veg. We do live rurally and I carry a practical and legal knife myself, I trust him and he has been shown the correct way to use and respect tools.

My older son though? No way 😂 I trust him to use the kitchen knives to prepare food and he's been taught exactly the same as his brother, but everyone is different and I don't feel he's coordinated or sensible enough. Horses for courses.

C8H10N4O2 · 11/12/2023 21:55

Standard age for penknives when I was a child was cubs/brownies age so about 8. Same when my DC were this age. They were not whittling birds at age 3 but were certainly able to manage a penknife safely at 8 because they had learned the basics and safety of sharp knives under supervision.

I wouldn't buy one for someone else's child without checking but since this is a done deal I'd let him use it under supervision with it going back into the cupboard after use to build confidence (for both of you).

Original poster

OlgaRhythm · 11/12/2023 22:10

SarahAndQuack · 11/12/2023 21:45

An 8 year old will be mature enough, though.

On what do you base that very sweeping statement?

OP posts:

WotNoUserName · 11/12/2023 22:11

Mine have had knives from Cub age. They were taught at Cubs and at home that they were only to be used under supervision, they weren't toys they could get out and play with whenever they felt like.

On the other hand it was my (and their dad's) decision to buy them, and I probably wouldn't have been impressed if a relative had bought one without consulting with us first.

Mind you, I cut my finger with my knife on Scout camp at the weekend so I'm not a good advert for knife safety.

sprigatito · 11/12/2023 22:12

I've taught hundreds of 8yos to whittle properly. The ones who cut themselves tend to be the ones with a hovering bug-eyed parent who won't let them concentrate.

LolaSmiles · 11/12/2023 22:14

I agree with you C8H10N4O2. It's not unreasonable for an 8 year old to have one, but it's not something I'd buy for a child without checking their parents felt comfortable with it.

CurlewKate · 11/12/2023 22:22

@Soontobe60 "Why would a small child need to cut string on bales?"

Well, some 8 year olds look after ponies. You'd need to cut twine on bales then....

WhatNoUsername · 11/12/2023 22:23

He's 8. Exactly the right age to taught knife safety and how to use one. A lovely present for an 8 year old. Children are babied these days. They are capable of much more than we give them credit got.

Bluelightbaby · 11/12/2023 22:26

Both my DD got one at around that age. Country farm kids and went to cubs etc…

if used safely and under supervision I can’t see any issue ?

Bluelightbaby · 11/12/2023 22:28

In fact at that age or younger they had their first air pistols for competition shooting with pony club

choixduroi · 11/12/2023 22:29

My Swiss army knife was my prized possession aged 8 (small town kid, bright but utterly impractical), because it felt like an adventurous tool. Never did myself any harm with it. My Dad thought it was inappropriate for a girl but got it anyway. Nowadays I live in Germany and I think a lot of people here would give an even younger than that kid a knife for 'Schnitzen', (carving) and messing around with wood, with appropriate instructions etc.. I wouldn't worry too much but it's up to you.

10HailMarys · 11/12/2023 22:30

Nothing wrong with a pen-knife for an eight-year-old. I had one at that age and my brother had several.

ActDottie · 11/12/2023 22:30

My grandpa got me a pen knife, I was probably a bit older but still at primary school.

Id let your child have it but I’d keep it somewhere special (high up) where if they want to use it they can but must ask and be supervised.

Roundycippae · 11/12/2023 22:30

My boy and girl both had swiss army knives at that age. Supervised but allowed to take camping etc.
Now 11 and 12 they have them to do whatever but whatever is opening parcels, cutting, using the screwdrivers etc etc

Roundycippae · 11/12/2023 22:31

They know they can’t be stupid with them, and haven’t been. They know they can’t take them to school.

LoveTheDarts · 11/12/2023 22:31

Mine have had them since 7ish I think I had one at the same age, maybe younger.

MercanDede · 11/12/2023 22:31

I got a leatherman multi-tool at that age and it has a knife on it as well. It’s better than a Swiss penknife because it had pliers and screwdrivers and such which were super useful as I’d often cycle with my fishing rod and spend the day fishing. When we were up at the lake cabin, it was also very useful for sailing my starfish sail boat around the lake. (This is a type of boat made for children to sail independently).

Roundycippae · 11/12/2023 22:32

My pocket knife is a prize possession! Always have it on me. as a mum they are bloody handy!

hechtfan · 11/12/2023 22:34

My DC's grew up in Switzerland and pen knives were on the kit list for school hiking trips from 1st grade, so about 6/7. It was assumed they all knew how to whittle sticks for cooking sausages/marshmallows/bread. So I guess the teachers here would think it irresponsible not to have taught an 8 year old how to safely use a pen knife. Just to offer another perspective - not suggesting any fault on your part!

poetryandwine · 11/12/2023 22:39

I had one at around 8 yo and really enjoyed it so I don’t see an inherent problem.

However

The parents should have been consulted ahead of time

OP’s further posts make it sound as though the maturity of this particular DC may be an issue. A pen knife isn’t necessarily right for an immature 8 yo, although I tend to believe the DC should be given the chance to prove himself.

Giggorata · 11/12/2023 23:53

Mine were country children and had knives from six-ish, I think. The multi tool type or copies of the Swiss Army Knife (which were called the Army Swiss Knife in our house)
The rule was that the knives were confiscated for the length of time that any cuts took to heal.
Knives were never to be taken to town or to school.
Anyone playing silly buggers or being dangerous with blades lost knife privileges, for a period of time depending on seriousness, parental determination being the yardstick.
This last never happened but it was felt important to state it.

CurlsnSunshinetime4tea · 12/12/2023 00:17

i think it's a fine gift especially if given by an older male relative (usually grandfather type traditions).
with the prevalence of amazon type deliveries and stormy weather i think it's perfectly reasonable for a city child to learn to use a pen knife safely at this age.

sunights · 12/12/2023 00:27

If a child that age injures themselves with an object they have been given (or able to access unsupervised), then my understanding is that the injury is the parent's responsibility. If the injury is serious the parent has to i. live with that and ii. can be prosecuted. I appreciate these point may sound harsh, but hope they may be of help when communicating to the gift-giver.

YerAWizardHarry · 12/12/2023 00:29

As a Cub leader I’m surprised at this! Scouts, yes. Cubs, not the done thing for them to have their own..

WhosAfraidOfVirginalWolves · 12/12/2023 00:37

I had quite a few knives as a young child (5-6 ish??) as my grandad had a big collection of them and gave some to me as a present. I was quite mature but pretty cack handed and ended up with cut fingers quite a few times. I've had paper cuts which bled more. Tbh, with most pocket knives, there's probably a limit to the amount of damage you could do without either trying or really dicking around.

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