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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was this rude on a first date?

35 replies

DatingMum6838 · 10/12/2023 19:03

Went on a first date today with someone I’ve been talking to for about 2 weeks, but quite a lot within those 2 weeks (messages, calls, video calls etc). We went and watched a sports match as we are both really interested in stuff like that and it was quite a big game.

A few of her friends were also at the same match and they were texting each other in the group chat quite a lot the whole time, like she had her phone in her hand most of the time.

AIBU or am I right in thinking this is rude? I was in double minds about it because obviously watching a game is quite a sociable thing and she was showing me what was going on in the group chat etc but I don’t know?!

OP posts:
LBFseBrom · 11/12/2023 06:36

DatingMum6838 · 11/12/2023 06:30

Yeah I sent her a message now tbf as I know she’ll be up for work soon just saying thanks for yesterday but I feel like a bit crap because of the excuse to go home, the being on the phone the whole time and the change of tone in messages and stuff afterwards, I don’t do very well with hot and cold stuff like that so I won’t be seeing you again but all the best going forward!

I really don’t have time for stuff like that

Sensible. More fish in the sea, DatingMum.

It just goes to show that chatting online or whatever does not reveal the real person. You have to meet in the flesh to see if there is chemistry between you and, in your case, there was not. It just didn't work.

Never mind, onwards and upwards. Good luck.

Ewoklady · 13/12/2023 01:08

Good for you 👍

BOOTS52PollyPrissyPants · 13/12/2023 03:09

Would drive me mad too and is very rude. But so many people nowadays go to concerts etc and have the phone out recording it all and are not really there in the moment enjoying the music or match or whatever.

You can do better and if this person and their behavior was annoying you now it would only get worse as they seem addicted to their phone and was not good on a first date and no point thinking it would improve.
Also cancelling the food part also really rude so think you both not compatible and good luck in the future.

Dobbybigearsdog · 13/12/2023 04:02

I totally agree very rude! My ex she was constantly on her phone - even in bed watching tv. It winds me up in general I think you prefer your phone - don’t bother meeting me

Dobbybigearsdog · 13/12/2023 04:04

I hope it’s ok to ask this op? . If you don’t mind me asking where did you meet her? I’ve just come out and not having much luck on pof x

Gymnopedie · 13/12/2023 04:09

Dobbybigearsdog · 13/12/2023 04:04

I hope it’s ok to ask this op? . If you don’t mind me asking where did you meet her? I’ve just come out and not having much luck on pof x

Sorry in the nicest possible way that made me laugh. It doesn't sound like the OP had much luck either given her posts. Maybe that's one to avoid!

Dobbybigearsdog · 13/12/2023 04:35

I meant in general terms lol totally clueless 😂

Passingthethyme · 13/12/2023 04:43

Rude

WandaWonder · 13/12/2023 04:47

I know it has been resovled now but it shouldnt be this hard, we could be 50/50 on rude or not but if you need to think about I would move on

Original poster
DatingMum6838 · 13/12/2023 07:43

@Dobbybigearsdog I met her on tinder but she lives really local to me so we knew people in common too… it’s really hard meeting other women… especially because it’s a small circle and everyone knows everyone, everyone has dated each other, it’s generally a lot of drama 😅😂 a lot of the time it’s quite long distance too. I’m in a really nice Facebook group - if you send me a message I’ll let you know which one it is x

OP posts:
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