To have bought essentials instead of doing Christmas

[StrugglingwithmyMH]

not a begging thread. feel really guilty and miserable right now but I haven’t bought myself or anyone else anything Christmassy this year I haven’t got a tree or any decorations my mattress broke which needed replacing and I needed a winter duvet. I donated a tenner to the Salvation Army and bought myself one gift. Luckily family are giving presents so I won’t miss out completely. A lot of the houses around here are decorated everyone has got a tree I feel so left out and wondering if I should have left the mattress for the month but it’s too late now not sure what I want from this thread but sometimes Christmas can feel so lonely

Yes OP it really can. Do you access any support through any agencies?

What do you mean by agencies

Having a decent mattress is way more important then a Christmas tree so you definitely made the right decision there.
But a lot of people replace their artificial trees often so is it worth asking on the local Facebook group if anyone has an old tree they are getting rid of? The year after I fled my ex I was quite upset with how unchristmassy the house felt and my sister got us a cheap second hand tree and we made some decorations for it. It was lovely and maybe worth a try?

Do you have a local freebies group near you on Facebook? The one near me gives away lots of Christmas trees at the moment and the occasional mattress also turns up on it.

If you feel sad about not having decorations, all of the major supermarkets will have reductions on their decorations and fairy lights from this week onwards. Sainsbury’s was selling battery operated strings of lights for £2.50 when I went in today. Buy a couple of those and a nice pot plant and go nuts.

Equally, gifts don’t have to be bought or expensive. You could make some cookies or candied fruits and parcel them up nicely to give to your family.

Do you have DC?

I can't be bothered with decorating the house for Christmas this year, I'm usually Christmas crazy, but we've been so busy, had some difficult events to navigate and I'm exhausted.

We have our smaller tree up, and that's it. I'm usually a garlands everywhere, multiple trees, new matching pyjamas person. We literally have one diddy tree and the kids decs on it. Just so the kids have a tree.

If I didn't have DC, we wouldn't have a tree up at all.

If the lack of a tree is making you feel bad, you can as PP says, often pick one up for free on FB marketplace, and often free decs and lights too, although presumably you have things from last year you can use?

If you are struggling financially/for food, and happen to be in East Anglia, please DM me. My work can help you.

You have a warm, comfortable bed. That's far more important than giving somebody else a toiletries gift set.

Decorating can be free or very cheap. You could cut some sprigs of holly or other greenery or red berries, light any candles you have, string up Christmas cards etc.

Facebook, local WhatsApp groups, Gumtree etc always have people who give Christmas things away for free. I would have a look on there if you fancy something Christmassy.

By agencies I meant family support worker, food bank, local church, any local initiatives for family support. They often have lots of leads on helpful local groups that are not always easily found on Google. Like others said do you have stuff from last year ?

Have you had to move and leave Christmas things behind from last year, or have you never had them? I haven't bought anything other than a pack of Christmas cards this year.

Christmas is a scam - just another day in the year like the 364 others

Maybe you could make some paper or popcorn chains or do some paper snowflakes to decorate?

This and lots of charity shops too. I can afford it but we don't go overboard. I haven't bought anything new this year because we have enough from the previous years. And same with kids presents, just got them 2 each and a stocking. Dh and I prefer quality time with them rather than a pile of gifts - a new family board game, Christmas movies , we make a huge bed on the floor in the living room and watch movies, I make lots of delicious platters of food and we enjoy nibbling through the day, play music and dance. You really don't need a lot to have a special Xmas.

Definitely try Facebook marketplace loads of trees going free on mine

You have done the right thing.
It’s only one day remember.
There’s too much spent on gifts and decorations for the holiday season.
I hope next year will be brighter for you.

The mattress and your sleep are more important so don’t worry about buying the mattress.

Can you get any help? maybe a food bank or look up food pantry- can’t remember a name of any pantries, sorry- but they are cheaper than supermarkets. Are you entitled to any benefits?

Why did you donate money to the Salvation Army when you’re so skint?