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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Toilet training & ABA

28 replies

Tiredboymum22 · 10/12/2023 09:11

DS (4) is autistic but verbal and very intelligent (he probably would’ve been diagnosed with Asperger’s 10 years ago). He’s independent in many ways except when it comes to toileting. We’ve tried everything including putting pants on him. He wet his pants and when we asked him why he didn’t use the toilet, he told us it was because he wasn’t finished drawing. He withholds his poo and when it does come out it’s horrendous and he has no control. Pants are out the question when we’re out and about. We’re at the end of our tether. A nursery nurse tried to help us to no avail.

I’ve gone in hard now. I’ve told him he doesn’t get to watch YouTube or play games on his tablet until he sits on the toilet at least three times a day. I feel kinda bad because there are sensory games that regulate him when he’s anxious and I’m using them as bargaining chips. He refused to let school change his pull up the other day and came home soggy and dirty with skid marks in his nappy. It’s a battle to get his bum clean with wet wipes. I’ve actually looked up ABA techniques regarding toileting and I’m going to ask the school to implement them.

I know it’s a controversial method within the autistic community but professionals have been useless!

OP posts:
Peepshowcreepshow · 10/12/2023 22:51

If you want to use an ABA approach at home that's up to you, but as a SENCO I would categorically not adopt an ABA approach in school unless directed to do so. There are many less rigid ways to support an autistic child and as pps have said there are many other factors that need to be considered.

Hankunamatata · 10/12/2023 22:57

Visual timetable (pictures) worked for us. Where dc stuck velcro smiley faces after doing each task, school used one too
Get up
Toilet sitting for 10mins with ipad ( sand timer or visual timer good)
Breakfast
Brush teeth
Wash face
Get dressed
Toilet sitting for 10mins with ipad
Then off to school

Then one for after school would be
Come home
Shoes and coat away
Toilet sit for 10mins with ipad
Then activity time
Toilet sit 10mins
Dinner
Toilet sit 10min
Pjs
Teeth
Toilet sit
Story

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