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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Stealing from clothing banks

41 replies

Iminneed · 08/12/2023 21:43

Just what the title say’s really I have children but due to illness etc Dh can’t work so at the moment struggling on benefits and can’t even replace my sons school shoes that have a hole in them,so if I see bags next to the clothing bank I open them and sort them if I see if there are any children’s clothes I take them wash and use if not I put everything back sometimes I feel like I’m stealing but if I don’t do do it then my children won’t have clothes do you think iabu

OP posts:

AnonyLonnymouse · 08/12/2023 22:04

I’m sorry things are so tough.

If you posted anonymously on your local FB group saying the ages and types of clothing you needed I think you would get some supportive responses.

Baby and children’s clothing banks would definitely be able to help.

FreshWinterMorning · 08/12/2023 22:04

Bless you darling. If you need them you take them sweetheart. I hope things get better for you very soon. I'm so sorry life's hard right now. God bless you all. ❤

AllAroundMyCat · 08/12/2023 22:09

Do it and tell all of your friends.

In an ideal world there would be clothes, shoes and bedding swap places so that we can all benefit , without judgement, and everything gets reused.

You are hastening the process.
Good luck to you .

Hankunamatata · 08/12/2023 22:09

It's quicker and easier to go to your local food bank. Our had a big donation of brand new school shoes and have uniforms galore.

Startyabastard · 08/12/2023 22:11

I would absolutely not blame you. I've been in dire straits before (I'm disabled with no kids), but I totally understand why you would do this. I hope things get better for you xxx

FrostyFlo · 08/12/2023 22:12

If you use your local food bank or can get in contact with them , some areas also have clothes you can look through or sign post you to something similar.

Coolhwip · 08/12/2023 22:13

DuploTrain · 08/12/2023 21:54

I’ve definitely seen this exact thread before.

But if this is genuine. Then yes, it’s fine. It’s a recycling bin for clothes - so no-one is missing out from you taking them.

The username is familiar.

DimplesToadfoot · 08/12/2023 22:17

No judgement from me over the clothing banks.

However I do think there might be easier routes you could take, have you looked to see if there are any clothing banks near you? For e.g. In my area we have a few including one that deals with children's clothes only, you can make requests and they'll do everything they can to help you.

Have you asked at school? If they can't help they generally know someone who can.

As a pp has already suggested, get a post on FB asking for help, I've never seen a post asking for help with children's clothes be ignored.

Good luck and I hope your situation improves soon xx

LylaLee · 08/12/2023 22:26

Clothing bundles would be more useful.

Rummaging through random bags full of size 18 men's clothing when you need clothes for two girls 8 & 11 will be a waste of time.

Local supermarket/corner shops/Facebook group: "If you have clothing that will fit girls aged 8 -11 please contact (mobile number). The maximum I can pay is £5 for the whole bundle."

That will get you what you actually need and save someone a trip to a charity shop.

Email the school office: "Do you have spare uniform & school shoes I can buy? They will have loads, plus with the school logo."

Contact citizens advice on the phone. It's mind boggling how many local charities are around that people don't know about. E.g. charities that will pay for after-school activities. And there are often benefits people don't realise they are entitled to.

LylaLee · 08/12/2023 22:28

Even if you can't afford the £5, the likelihood is that you will be given it for free if you ask.

And someone who is having a clear out will probably give you a bunch of useful things too.

DonnaBanana · 08/12/2023 22:28

Gro · 08/12/2023 21:48

If I put clothes in the clothes bank I wouldn't care if people in need took them surely that is why most people donate.

Officially I'm pretty sure it is illegal because the donation belongs to the charity.

That can’t be true. I’ve seen stories where people who’ve left bags next to the collection point get fines for littering so clearly the clothes are being considered to be left in public and remain the property of the “litterer” if anything

Mummyto2rugrats · 08/12/2023 22:51

Our local area has a fb thrift site has clothes shoes toys furniture etc on its very successful there are rules around it which everyone follows.

Definitely check with school on used uniform /shoes /pe kit/ trainers I'm treasure for our PTA and we handle the "sustainable uniform sales" we ask forthe clothesto be donated as the kids grow out and when we sell we only ask for a donation of whatever the parent can afford we havd had for example £5 for the school blazer which new is £35 but we are not here to judge just help and them anything we make goes straight back into the teachers bids for learning materials or club materials.

It is 100% hard at the minute I wouldn't judge if I saw as others have said I only object if people are getting and then selling.

Look up fb pages for thrifting and if your area doesn't have one start one.

SlightlygrumpyBettyswaitress · 08/12/2023 22:51

Do you have a salvation army or church nearby?
I asked in my local Sally army shop if they took children's clothes as I couldn't see any in the shop. They said they welcomed them but did not sell them in the shop they gave them directly to families in need. It was a little while ago but I hope they do the same thing now.
I also had a friend who ran a clothing bank in conjuction with her church. They would batch up clothes e.g 8 year old boy, 3 pairs of trousers, 5 tops, a jacket and a pack of new underwear, ready to give where they saw need.

ChilledToTheBone · 08/12/2023 22:54

I wouldn't judge. Unless you left it thrown all over the place after as I saw someone do once. But im sure you bag it back up and be on your way. Hope things improve for your family soon

uncomfortablydumb53 · 08/12/2023 23:15

I think it's fine, you're just cutting out the middleman( sorting and distributing)
I would never judge anyone
Needs must

JoyeuxNarwhal · 09/12/2023 09:50

Our local church has a monthly clothing exchange. Although it's called that you don't actually have to give anything to get and there's loads of stuff for all age groups. Worth checking if you have something similar nearby @Iminneed - ours is promoted on local facebook groups as well as through schools and posters in the village.

Eta - nothing wrong with what you're doing imo, just offering another suggestion.

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