Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I’m just unlucky?

11 replies

TheonlywayIcould · 08/12/2023 20:15

Everything always goes wrong. On both a big and small scale. I’m a positive thinker and I have a gratitude journal and I try not manifesting as in wishing things true but to focus on positives and positive energy. But it all still goes wrong, always.

I never have any good luck. I hear all the time about people who’ve won this or gotten that or had this happen or escaped such and such, but it never happens to me. I am the person who gets shot on, gets ill, perfectly good car randomly breaks down, roof suddenly starts leaking because of a freak accident, And so on. Every day something really fucking shit happens. Or a series of really small shitty things happen. I have had people tell me they think I’m unlucky and an ex-boyfriend tell me all the time they thought I was a bad luck charm.

I know if I have a roof over my head (despite it leaking) and food in my stomach then I’m insanely lucky, but I wish I could just wake up one day and have a day where things just didn’t go fucking wrong. It doesn’t even have to be things going in my favour, just tired of things going fucking wrong, always. I just want a day of peace where things just flow normally.

Is this just me?

OP posts:
Cas112 · 08/12/2023 20:19

I think some people do just get a run of bad luck. Hopefully will get better

I'm also one of them people, if something bad or ridiculous happens that seems really unlucky my partner always says to me 'that would happen to you'

I know some people will say no such thing as luck but when you get a series of misfortunate mishaps time and time again it's hard to look at it another way 😂

Original poster
TheonlywayIcould · 08/12/2023 20:23

Cas112 · 08/12/2023 20:19

I think some people do just get a run of bad luck. Hopefully will get better

I'm also one of them people, if something bad or ridiculous happens that seems really unlucky my partner always says to me 'that would happen to you'

I know some people will say no such thing as luck but when you get a series of misfortunate mishaps time and time again it's hard to look at it another way 😂

It’s been years! I know people say you focus on the bad and every time you drive your car from a to b without incident then you should take notice of that but when that journey is bookended by constant shitty incidents it’s hard not to focus on it!

OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 08/12/2023 20:30

Constant ceaseless never ending run of bad luck not tragic luck just bad

My latest is being sold a pc the monitor has dead pixels (apparently they will sort this not sure how) then they are asking if I connected the motherboard and graphics card....excuse me? That's your job? If I wanted to buy pc parts I would buy pc parts I bought a PC nothing was said to me about the parts needing to be put together??? Fucks sake it's a birthday gift I've enough to deal with (deep breaths) and after taking a closer look at the listing it doesn't come with a Vga lead? Why? Why would you sell me something I cannot fucking use advertising it as complete 😒 (yes this one was my fault I read the "ready to use complete system" headline)

It's not bad luck its inconvenience bad luck

DoesMaryNotDrive · 08/12/2023 20:35

I feel the same.

We extended our house and paid thousands in building regs. Just a year later, the government introduced Permitted Development.

We bought a house and paid five figure stamp duty, only for the government to introduce reduced Stamp Duty shortly after.

We bought a house just as the property market slumped.

I work hard at work but colleagues are often at the right place at the right for promotions.

But the positive in all this is it makes you very resilient, nothing much fazes me anymore.

Catza · 08/12/2023 22:00

I do genuinely believe it is what you chose to focus on. If I were to sit down and write a list, I could come up with hundreds of shit things that happened to us last year - someone crashed into my new car two weeks after buying it right in front of my house, a week later someone stole my newly replaced mirror, pipes burst in the kitchen, my partner was diagnosed with degenerative disorder, dog ate my expensive shoe… this was just in January. But it’s just life and you have to think whether it is really something you need to spend your energy thinking about. I fixed the car, bought a new mirror, got the plumber in, threw away the other shoe and my partner got care. All is OK and we have an awesome life which is full of cuddles, good films, amazing nature walks, tasty meals, days out with the family and job satisfaction. We are all alive, mobile and happy. Why focus on the negatives?

Aroundthewaygirl · 08/12/2023 23:15

This is my life. I tell everyone my middle name is unlucky cause the only luck I’ve had is bad.

you’re not alone

WinterParakeets · 08/12/2023 23:26

One thing I have noticed about 'lucky' people is that they never dwell on their bad luck. They just solve the problem, or if they can't they don't focus on it. If their roof is leaking they don't tell anyone.

Try not dwelling on the bad luck. Everyone gets ill. Everyone's car breaks down at some point. Every house needs repairing. Reframe these as events that just occur in life.

WinterParakeets · 08/12/2023 23:33

Catza · 08/12/2023 22:00

I do genuinely believe it is what you chose to focus on. If I were to sit down and write a list, I could come up with hundreds of shit things that happened to us last year - someone crashed into my new car two weeks after buying it right in front of my house, a week later someone stole my newly replaced mirror, pipes burst in the kitchen, my partner was diagnosed with degenerative disorder, dog ate my expensive shoe… this was just in January. But it’s just life and you have to think whether it is really something you need to spend your energy thinking about. I fixed the car, bought a new mirror, got the plumber in, threw away the other shoe and my partner got care. All is OK and we have an awesome life which is full of cuddles, good films, amazing nature walks, tasty meals, days out with the family and job satisfaction. We are all alive, mobile and happy. Why focus on the negatives?

I think this too. If I recall last year I could script it so that it sounds really horrific and depressing or as if I have the most blessed life on earth. Neither would be a lie. Both are true, depending on what I focus on.

WhateverMate · 08/12/2023 23:37

Every day something really fucking shit happens. Or a series of really small shitty things happen.

What, every single day of your life?

I do doubt that, which is why I agree with the PP who said it's probably your focus.

fetchacloth · 08/12/2023 23:45

WinterParakeets · 08/12/2023 23:26

One thing I have noticed about 'lucky' people is that they never dwell on their bad luck. They just solve the problem, or if they can't they don't focus on it. If their roof is leaking they don't tell anyone.

Try not dwelling on the bad luck. Everyone gets ill. Everyone's car breaks down at some point. Every house needs repairing. Reframe these as events that just occur in life.

That's good advice.
I used to be the same as OP but these days I try to take things in my stride and deal with things as they arise, rather than fret about what bombshell is coming next.
Life is less onerous then 😌

whyamiawakestill · 08/12/2023 23:56

My life is also non stop shitty luck, but I tell nobody, I focus only on fun good stuff.

Our house flooded, boilers leaked, cars stolen, damaged, sick kids, my father died.. I've had Covid a zillion times and was hospitalised.. I could just go on and on and on.. down to the dog having the shits and stinking out our house, my husband not getting the last job he really wanted.

But I don't, I smile, I keep busy and as active as my chronic illness allows me and laugh and love life, life is fleeting, it's complex and it's a blessing.

Maybe go a bit more "big picture" on life? Travel, explore take up astronomy the bigger your outlook and horizons the less the bad luck even registers.

Oh and on that note I booked a trip to Iceland just as the volcano erupted, I've missed bombings overseas by the skin of my teeth. I could write a whole book on bad luck.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page