Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I accidentally stole an entire big shop

624 replies

Rayoffingsunshine · 07/12/2023 20:17

I spent about £95 on a big shop 3 weeks ago. I went through the scan and go. I had my two boys with me (2 and 3 months) and I paid using contactless. I didn't grab the receipt which I didn't notice until I got home and was annoyed because the supermarket had an offer for money off voucher if you spend so much that I had intended to grab but only realised I didn't have it when I got home.
I budget everything and wrote the shop on my budget app straight away so I noticed the discrepancy on my account within a few days. I thought it was just taking a little longer than normal to process but 3 weeks later there's still no record of it. I've checked every account I have including my husband's just in case I had his card though I'm certain it was just my day to day debit card. The only thing I can think is that the payment didn't process and I just didn't notice and walked straight out. But surely someone would have stopped me! I remember a friend telling me once, with a tiny shop, just a quick lunch on the go kind of shop, this happened to her once and she was stopped in the car park by security. I don't understand how this has happened. I wouldn't have been quick to leave because my 2 year old moves at a snails pace.

If I go and talk to customer service in the shop will they believe that is was a genuine mistake and just let me pay for it or will I get in trouble?

OP posts:
Frabbits · 07/12/2023 21:22

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 21:17

@LauderSyme morality is subjective

The definition of shoplifting isn't, though.

hydriotaphia · 07/12/2023 21:22

Personally I would go back and pay. Not doing so is no different than deciding to steal it because you think you can get away with it (ie wrong). IMHO.

sleepD3pr1ived · 07/12/2023 21:24

Was it Tesco?

I'd ring up, explain what happened and ask them how you can pay.

Honesty is always the best policy.

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 21:25

LauderSyme · 07/12/2023 21:21

In case it is at all unclear, I was being sarcastic and @FatFatMary is probably a big fat fat tealeaf and proud of it.

How could you call me that ?

Tistheseason17 · 07/12/2023 21:25

So many interesting values and behaviours.
I like where I shop, I'm honest and I don't want to get banned. Just because you weren't stopped then doesn't mean you won't be in the future.
I'm not a thief.
Tesco may not even be bothered but you'll feel a whole lot better.

Keepingittogetherstepbystep · 07/12/2023 21:25

The scan and go system knows exactly who you are, next time you try to use it you'll inevitably get pulled for a check. Ring the up or email them to explain and find out how the want to resolve it.

Happened to the guy in front of me, I'd alerted staff who went after him and he came back and sorted it, he'd genuinely thought it had gone through. The tills at our local tesco are not very reliable.

I once picked up too many spices got home to find 1 more than I paid for, I took it back and paid for it the customer service person howled with laughter that I'd gone back.

AgnesX · 07/12/2023 21:25

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:36

Yes because no theft occurred

Show quote history

She left without paying.... you say tomayto, I'll say tomato.

ChocolateCinderToffee · 07/12/2023 21:25

I did this recently and went back to pay. They gave me some money off for going back!

Copernicus321 · 07/12/2023 21:26

Agreed... a lot of stores have cameras built into the self-service till recording the face of every customer. I would approach the Customer Services Manger.

tachycardigan · 07/12/2023 21:27

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:50

Just because your morals are different to mine doesn’t make yours automatically right

Show quote history

But your morals automatically make you a thief.

TruthThatsHardAsSteel · 07/12/2023 21:27

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:22

Why do you feel the need to pay it ?

That's what normal people do.

SkySecret · 07/12/2023 21:30

This is like the opposite of the carrier bag thread 🤣

Maelil01 · 07/12/2023 21:31

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:22

Why do you feel the need to pay it ?

There’s this thing called honesty…

Look it up in the dictionary!

C1N1C · 07/12/2023 21:32

I don't see the difference between an accidental theft and an intended theft, and I'm surprised others don't either.

People saying take the win, ignore it, they won't miss it etc, are basically saying theft is OK if you don't get caught. Great role models.

Blink1880 · 07/12/2023 21:34

I Did this with a small shop and the security guy caught me at my car (I’d actually not even scanned my card). They were perfectly understanding - this stuff happens.

ChocolateCinderToffee · 07/12/2023 21:34

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:22

Why do you feel the need to pay it ?

I went back and paid when it happened to me because I would think less of myself if I didn’t.

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 21:35

There’s a difference between you doing this to a person and a corporation though

PrimalOwl10 · 07/12/2023 21:36

I did this I got chatting to the lady and scanned my clubcard thinking it was my card and walked out without paying, I rung them up and I came straight back and paid they had me on camera but could see it was a mistake. Personally I'd go back and pay. The security guard was lovely and always says hello to me now 🤣

elfies · 07/12/2023 21:38

Rayoffingsunshine You sound a lovely genuine honest person , I'd be proud to call you a friend . Put your mind at rest , phone the manager , explain as you have on here ,and ask for advice . I imagine they'll say write it off and thank you for being so honest ...I would if I was the manager .

ChocolateCinderToffee · 07/12/2023 21:38

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 21:35

There’s a difference between you doing this to a person and a corporation though

I think the sort of person who would do this to a corporation would also do it to an individual.

MonZb · 07/12/2023 21:38

SkySecret · 07/12/2023 21:30

This is like the opposite of the carrier bag thread 🤣

Posters on there are horrified over a 30p bag not being paid for! Confused

CestTresChic · 07/12/2023 21:38

This happened to me and I called them and payed it - mainly because I had images of being as arrested as a shoplifter next time I set foot in the store!

Duh · 07/12/2023 21:39

For all those saying there was no intent… legally there may have been no intent at the time but the moment the OP realises the act of theft (no matter accidental at the time) and decides to keep the stolen property she forms intent at that time. The act and intent do not have to be simultaneous.

So technically if OP keeps the shopping she has committed theft unless she returns to the store to sort sharpish. It’s up to her morals and attitude to risk whether she wants to keep quiet about it

Those saying ‘pay it forward’, morally I understand but, in the unlikely circumstances OP is caught and charged (very, very unlikely but looking at this hypothetically), say OP tried to convince the police/court that she is not a thief as she paid it forward, the very act of paying it forward is an acknowledgment of guilt so I’d avoid that!

Shakeylegs · 07/12/2023 21:40

Frabbits · 07/12/2023 21:22

The definition of shoplifting isn't, though.

Show quote history

The chances of any legal recourse against OP are absolutely tiny, and even if some was taken the mitigations are such that there would be no public interest in prosecuting and very little chance of a conviction.

I’m a Magistrate and if this case came before me I’d a) be angry and b) extremely surprised.

Maelil01 · 07/12/2023 21:40

FatFatMary · 07/12/2023 20:50

Just because your morals are different to mine doesn’t make yours automatically right

Show quote history

🤦🏼‍♀️