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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Made to pay for a bag in the supermarket

698 replies

christmasfoodshop · 07/12/2023 12:43

Just picked up a few bits for Xmas food shop.

Had baby with me and she was tired so getting a bit irritable.

Scanned all my shopping at self checkout, ended up with a quite a lot more than I needed (as you do).

Baby crying. Paid for my shopping.

Realised I needed a bag at this point so got one and put all my stuff in there.

Go to walk out.

The shop assistant said I needed to pay for a bag. Fair enough.

She said I had to rescan it.

Baby now screaming and wriggling out my arms. Heavy bag of shopping in the other hand.

She made me wait there until she'd scanned a bag, pressed 'check-out' , selected 'pay by card' and then I had to scan. All for bloody 30p.

In hindsight, I do understand I had to pay for the bag but I was so bloody frustrated and just wanted to get out of there that I paid 30p for the bag and stormed off. Left my giant trolley in the middle of self checkout. I was at my wits end. I felt like I was at school being held back by the teacher.

It's 30 bloody pence. Let me go!!

She acted like she was earning money out of making people pay for bags.

YABU - everyone ALWAYS must pay for bags no matter what

YANBU - in the circumstance, she should have just let me go all for the sake of 30p plastic bag.

OP posts:
BubbleBubbleBubbleBubblePop · 07/12/2023 16:26

She was just doing her job however I would have just given you the bag. I was in spar a couple of weeks ago and had the wee one with me, had my hands full and had already paid for my shopping and the woman on the checkout just gave the bag to me as id forgotten one. I honestly appreciated that so much as I was so frazzled that day.

Fireiswarm · 07/12/2023 16:32

She would have got into a lot of trouble with her employer if they saw that she let you go without paying, far more trouble than it was worth to just make you pay. She wasn't being petty about 30p. Just chalk it up to a bad shopping trip out and let it go. No point fretting about it anymore.

BoredofBlonde · 07/12/2023 16:32

YANBU - she could have offered help, but no, decided that 30p was more important. Pathetic.

I wonder if she would confront a big 6 ft 4 muscle mountain for 30p? The amount they lose in purposeful stealing and accept it, as a one off this was nothing.

FarEast · 07/12/2023 16:33

YABU.

Not much more to say, really. Don't know why you posted?

NoTouch · 07/12/2023 16:34

You attempted to shoplift. Doesn't make any difference if it was a bag or a couple of carrots it was still a item you were buying.

It is not a good look to pass blame and your frustration onto a retail worker. It is not as if it is even a new thing you have to buy bags, it has been in place for over 8 years now.

Hope your baby settled and the rest of your day was less stressful.

Mrsjayy · 07/12/2023 16:36

BoredofBlonde · 07/12/2023 16:32

YANBU - she could have offered help, but no, decided that 30p was more important. Pathetic.

I wonder if she would confront a big 6 ft 4 muscle mountain for 30p? The amount they lose in purposeful stealing and accept it, as a one off this was nothing.

what help could she have offered? its not about the 30p the op threw a tantrum because she was embarrassed about a bag she didn't pay for this is on her not somebody doing their actual job at a self service checkout !

zingally · 07/12/2023 16:37

I get that you are frazzled and irritable. I remember that baby stage well, when sometimes it just felt like everything, and everyone, is against you.

But I say this with kindness. This is entirely a you problem. The "pay for a bag" thing has been in existence since long pre-baby.
If they gave a free bag to everyone with a sob story, we'd all be doing it.

But, I'm sure, hand on heart, that no-one here could say that they've never thought "fuck it" and taken a bag without paying. I know I have. You just got a bit of a jobsworth this time.

Starzinsky · 07/12/2023 16:37

Stealing is stealing YABU.

WombatChocolate · 07/12/2023 16:38

I think shop assistant needed to charge OP for bag - she wouldn’t have had authority not to.

But she could have helped OP. Instead of telling her to go and scan a bag that was full of shopping whilst holding a wriggly baby, she could have taken OP to where bags are, got one and scanned an empty bag and then held OP’s shopping whilst she got her purse or phone out to pay.

The thing that made OP upset was the manner she was treated. It wasn’t so much paying 30p I suspect, but the lack of customer service to recognise it was all very tricky for OP and she really had her hands full. A bit of good customer service can go a long way to smoothing things.

StoodySmithereens · 07/12/2023 16:40

YABU, you knew what you had done. They’d never make any money if they let everyone off who got stressed over their kids.

BoredofBlonde · 07/12/2023 16:44

Mrsjayy · 07/12/2023 16:36

what help could she have offered? its not about the 30p the op threw a tantrum because she was embarrassed about a bag she didn't pay for this is on her not somebody doing their actual job at a self service checkout !

Show quote history

The "normal" kind of help when you see someone stressed, crying baby and with a heavy bag of shopping??! You know, "can we carry something to the car for you"? Common courtesy. And dont bother saying that isnt what they are there for/understaffed/ whatever, I am merely answering your question - I have no idea of staffing levels, just a bit of thoughtfulness wouldn't have done amiss.

Definitely not the help she decided on after seeing all the above and thinking the priority was to get 30p off an obviously stressed mum who has PAID for her stuff so isnt purposely thinking "I know, on my way out I'll thieve a bag for life"

Just a thought 🙄

HarrietStyles · 07/12/2023 16:47

So so unreasonable. If she let everyone with a crying baby have a free bag, or everyone who was elderly have a free banana because they forgot to scan it ……. She would very quickly get sacked. The whole point of her job at the self scan check out is to make sure that people DON’T leave with anything unpaid.

alltoomuchrightnow · 07/12/2023 16:50

One thing customers forget is...
(and this is how it is in the shop I work in but others too)... we are on camera.
We are also secret shopped. (mystery shoppers)
We also have supervisors walking around checking, often micromanaging (but really, just doing their job). We have inspections too where we are actually rated.
I once gave a customer a tiny sliver of fabric sample and got caught and nearly lost my job. I was just trying to give good customer service.. I always do. But most things do not go unnoticed inc 'giving away' bags

minou123 · 07/12/2023 16:56

WombatChocolate · 07/12/2023 16:38

I think shop assistant needed to charge OP for bag - she wouldn’t have had authority not to.

But she could have helped OP. Instead of telling her to go and scan a bag that was full of shopping whilst holding a wriggly baby, she could have taken OP to where bags are, got one and scanned an empty bag and then held OP’s shopping whilst she got her purse or phone out to pay.

The thing that made OP upset was the manner she was treated. It wasn’t so much paying 30p I suspect, but the lack of customer service to recognise it was all very tricky for OP and she really had her hands full. A bit of good customer service can go a long way to smoothing things.

I may have misread the Op, but that's what rhe employee did.

She made me wait there until she'd scanned a bag, pressed 'check-out' , selected 'pay by card' and then I had to scan

The way I read this was, the employee helped the Op out by scanning an empty bag for her, selecting the buttons and all the Op had to do was tap her card.

The way the Op has explained it, the employee stopped her taking the bag, but did everything else to help the Op pay for it.

Hadjab · 07/12/2023 17:00

She acted like she was earning money out of making people pay for bags

Well technically she is.

Whilst stores are, in theory, supposed to donate the profit from bags to charities, they aren’t legally required to do so, and many that do aren’t donating all of it, so technically, it’s going towards costs, one of which is wages.

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 07/12/2023 17:02

It's theft.

And she has a responsibility to watch the customers on self scan - as a few customers will push a full trolly through and out the store without paying / some will not scan the items in the bottom of the buggy / not scan the hat the child is wearing etc.

If her supervisor or manager witnessed her permitting free bags, the comment will be ' did you not see that customer not paying for the bag ! '

It's been law now for several years in the England that plastic bags have to be paid for, and some stores now charge for their ' new ' paper carrier bags.

Chocolatecakewithsprinkles · 07/12/2023 17:09

Yabu and a bit of a dick for dumping a trolley because they made you pay for a product.

salamirose · 07/12/2023 17:10

YourDiscoNeedsYou · 07/12/2023 14:49

Let’s try to remember that bags used to be free not so long ago. They only charge because it’s the law, to reduce single use plastics. It’s not like shoplifting at all.

Yes, OP should pay for a bag but so also think people in people facing roles could have a bit of compassion. If I was the shop assistant I’d have ignored it thinking OP had enough on her plate. We've all been there, surely, or know the feeling. I’d not be rude to retail (or any) staff, though.

Yes it is. The bag is an item they sell.

Daisies12 · 07/12/2023 17:18

You're being wildly unreasonable. She would get in trouble if she didn't charge for bags. You've clearly never done a job like that. Why should you get special treatment because you have an offspring.

YourWinter · 07/12/2023 17:19

YABU

CHRIS003 · 07/12/2023 17:24

YANBU - but learn from this situation - next time you have to do supermarket shop on your own with the baby make sure you take enough bags with you.
It may be better for you to go to the staffed checkout instead self scanning. They will usually offer you help with packing or get someone else to come and help.
You are making life harder for yourself than it needs to be by trying do self checkout with crying baby and this will be why you forgot the bag.

Viviennemary · 07/12/2023 17:24

She should have let you pay 30p. Not let you off with the charge. Why wouldn't the bag not need to be paid for. Screaming baby = free bag. Err no it doesn't. I thought you meant rescan all your shoppng.

Ktime · 07/12/2023 17:27

Realised I needed a bag at this point so got one and put all my stuff in there.

How did you only realise you needed a bag at the end? Surely it was obvious how much stuff you had? How were you going to carry the shopping and your baby if you didn’t have a pram ?

kaboomy · 07/12/2023 17:32

OP I think the message is load and clear. YABVVU.