To feel like I'm no good at anything..

[innocentdevil77]

At the grand age of 35 I can honestly say I am useless at everything.

Some of my friends are successful photographers, bakers, or are good mothers. The only job I've done since my early 20s I'm not particularly good at and I only earn just above minimum wage... I tried baking and the results are laughable.. and I can't even say I'm a very good mum. I can't cook, bake, sew.. nothing.

Anyone else ever feel this way?

Sorry to hear that you feel you aren't good at anything OP. I know this may not be what you want to hear but I'm sure there is something that you are wonderful at that you've overlooked.

I think holding down a job for as long as you have done is an achievement in itself! you must be good at it, if you were terrible they would have let you go by now.

Anyway, can you try and think again? Maybe it's something light hearted, but it's still something

I don’t think the ability to cook, bake and sew make you a good mum. I’m not very good at any of those things either and I think I’m a good mum. As long as you’re feeding them decent food, I think how loving, understanding, and attentive you are is the measure of being a good mum

From your original post, you seem to be equating sewing, cooking and cleaning with being a good Mother? If you say nice things to your children and genuinely support them and love them for who they are; you’re a good Mother. My Mum was great at domestic chores but hated us and we all grew up very anxious. So do not worry about not being excessively domestic.

I think 35 is a crisis age tbh. People talk about ‘mid life crisis’ in ones 40s and 50s but the mid 30s are a headfuck. I’m 36 and I also feel like I’ve achieved nothing. It’s an age where you will feel like change is harder so you’ll analyse all the things you could have done differently when you were younger (or that’s my theory). Just remember, Vera Wang was 42 when she designed her first dress! There are also champion pole dancers in their 60s. You can still make any change you want; you’re not actually too old. I know you didn’t mention age but I imagine that’s part of why you’re being so hard on yourself.

As a PP said, you must be great at your job to be there after so long. Earning mega bucks isn’t everything. You might not have any ‘weird and wonderful’ talents but I’m sure you have plenty of talents.

Yeah, I’m rubbish at most things! No hobbies or talents or specialist knowledge. But my friends seem to like me. So I reckon I’m doing OK, and you probably are too.