to be fed-up my mum wants to feed DS choc and now moved onto pop???

[sparklyshoos]

DS is 12mo, as soon as he cut his first tooth at 6mo, mum said "ooh, we can give you choccies now". i said firmly, no, we're not giving him chocolate yet. she looked at me like I was most peculiar and couldn't understand why, despite me trying to explain that we just want him to know good healthy eating habits and he can have chocolate when we can't avoid it anymore - ie, when he sees other kiddies eating it and wants some too. (I should add at this point, last easter at 3wks old, he got 5 easter eggs!)

He's not the biggest eater and we just about manage to get 3 meals a day in him now, somedays he won't always eat one of his meals, so I certainly don't want him filling up on chocolate and eating even less food.

So, today when I was at her house, i offered DS a drink out of his cup (water, not that I said have some water, so she didn't actually know what was in it even!) and she said "Oh when is your mummy going to give you fizzy pop in there?" so i said in a fairly jokey manner "Why are you determined to ruin his teeth?" to which she replied "Well he'll do it himself when he grows up, so why not now?"

anybody else managed to deal with this succesfully without falling out with their mum??? I'm honestly not a "my baby will only eat bean sprouts" kind of mum (no offence to anybody who does just feed their baby beansprouts of course ), but i just don't see the need to give him chocolate at the moment - I see my niece at 5, still not eating proper meals and demanding pot noodle and chocolate for lunch and it's not what i want for my baby! So, AIBU???

Lol at 3 eggs last Easter!
Tis a tricky situation. You sound like you're doing a pretty good job as it is. My ds is 19 mths and I don't mind him getting a little bit of chocolate now and then but i would be cross if my mum gave him a whole bar! Fortunately she never would (or not when I was looking anyway!) Just carry on being firm but funny and offload your frustration to your dp, friends and us lot.

My DD is 18 months and I work on the basis that the odd treat from grandparents won't upset her normal good diet. You are the parent and your mother should respect whatever rules you put in place for your child.

it is your baby it is up to you to dtermine its nutrion. Granny alwatys wants to spoil wee one's and unfortunately that usually means sugary tooth-rot.try be tactful, but stand your ground.i guess try discuss your rationale and if she wants to indulge could it be an alternative eg book, bubbles, balloon

i have not given my wee one any pop, choc,biscuits etc and granny thinks it is tantamount to cruelty - i think culturally they associate sweetie = treat

by all means they will inevitably discover tooth-rot stuff and pop etc but why encourage it

We have rationed the chocolate and only have it as a treat and then only a little. DS1 loves it when given it but will quite happily eat fruit.
I would be really cross if my mother gave him fizzy drinks. I don't mind the chocolate as much though.

I completely agree with you. She should respect your wishes, he is your son after all.
I don't give my son chocolate or pop if I can avoid it. He's 3 now and he still only gets chocolate every blue moon. People might think I'm being cruel, but I don't care. I know when he's old enough he'll be buying it in the shop so I want to minimise it for as long as I can.
I'm lucky in that both my mother and mother in law feel the same way as I do (most of the time) so I don't really have to worry too much what they might give him. Though my MIL keeps offering him tea all the time!! Not sure why.
She'll just have to accept that she'll have to go by your rules. She may think she knows best, but it's up to you what he eats. Good luck with it.

YANBU. I feel for you. Have similar situation here but I am prepared to fall out with my mum about it. 2 months ago, she bought DD (then 7mo) a cardboard easter egg filled with yummy choccy buttons. Well I thought they were yummy, DD still has no idea what chocolate is. Will watch and wait for wise words of wisdom from MNers who have been there, done that....

No advice I'm afraid but if you find an answer please let me know!

My DD is 8wo and granny suggested yesterday that of course she could have an easter egg. We'd just let it melt on our fingers and she could suck it off. Uhm. No. Cue cries of "pfb syndrome" and "you're not going to be one of those mothers are you?"

Normally she's wonderful so I just have to hope she was having a weird moment

Just because he may have pop when he is older doesn't mean he needs to have it now.

He will probably drink beer when he is older - does she think he may as well have that now as well?

And who bought a 3 week old Easter Eggs??

the agreement granny and i came to over this if she wants send books etc.so she sends wee books etc.LOL still asks with a straight face if wee one likes irn bru or wants a wee Look at teacakewe don't argue over it - life is to short.she just thinks im a heidcase for not dishing out the goodies

Good argument, NAB! I don't think it's being precious to not offer stuff of no nutritional value and lots of tooth-rotting potential to a child who has no idea what it is.

I always used to say to my mum, "Isn't it weird how people express love by giving kids tooth decay and heart disease, not to mention good old early onset diabetes. They'd much prefer a comic." Shegets them comics. At least when I'm around

LOL give the one you love high cholesterol and bad eating habits - awwww nice

Misread your first post ScottishMummy & thought 'the agreement granny' was a name. I rather like the sound of a granny who complies with all my wishes re DD's diet and general upbringing . Obviously, from the posts on here, they are very rare beings and should be a protected species.

oh thanks all so much, glad I'm not alone! He already has one egg this year from my aunty (big family, so lots of aunties to provide eggs)...I munched my way through the buttons today.
I do like that one about the beer NAB, I'll try that next time she starts. I have thought about telling her to offer him an apple / banana as a treat, as he really enjoys these, so I'll work on that.

Honestly I'm not going to take my own healthy food to parties he goes to, happy for him to get stuck in at that stage. In the meantime, I suppose I'll just have to eat all the choc myself [big sigh].

I caught my mother feeding my then 6 month old icing sugar at xmas, she had only just been weaned ffs! Now it almost easter, 'well I SUPPOSE youre not going to let her have an easter egg' I said no shes only 8 months old why dont you get her a cheap book or something. She pondered this for a moment and said well what about buttons? Theyre not that bad

haha mumbear, that's like nana off royle family "oh they're vegetarian, they can have some of that wafer thin ham can't they?!!"

Also could you donate the eggs to a local hospital/charity/raffle? Any be saintly in the process?

My dd is 12 months and has had little bits of chocolate, I believe that because she eats such a balance diet (with lots of fruit and veg) that the odd bit now and again isn't going to hurt her.. But fizzy pop.... OMG i dont even have that.

yes lardylumps (love the name!) I agree with you on that one - if I'm eatingchoc in front of DS and he lunges towards it, then he's had tiny tastes - I can't really refuse in that situation, so honestly, I'm not OTT about it, i do try to be realistic, but I was so when she said that about the fizzy pop, i just thought "where did that come from???" - and the worst of it all??? - she's late onset diabetes herself!??!! (not overweight or anything, she doesn't overindulge in the sweet stuff too much herself, but still???)

It is awful when people try to dictate what your child can eat. I have had it as dd had reflux and is very small for her age, but you must stick to your guns on this, he is your baby after all. Fizzy pop indead.

Sparklyshoes - I do sympathise!!!!!! Had the same thing with my mother who could not understand why DS1 did not have chocolate. She actually said 'But he has to develop a sweet tooth' 10 years later I still have to ask them not to give sweets. The DC occasionally have have fizzy orange if there is nothing else on offer, but don't particularly like it and have have never had cola. Why would they???? They drink water and milk.

at fizzy pop at 12mo!!!

I did let my dd have the odd chocolate button at 12mo - but very rarely - thinking about it, they were bought by my mum for her! (DD still would much rather have grapes as a treat anyway).

Is it just your mum wanting to have special granny treats that she can give him? Maybe you can work out a few things with her where she could feel like she was spoiling your DS but not going against your wishes (like those nice organic biscuits sweetened with apple juice instead of sugar, or grapes or suchlike?) I know my dm is a bit mystified at the lack of chocolate in my dd's diet (and she's someone who has always eaten pretty healthily), but she knows not to push it

Well, the Easter egg at 3 weeks sounds rather a good idea- everybody knows that new Mums need to keep their strength up . And he wasn't going to tell on you, was he?

This year, I think you should try to get her to make it a nice bottle of red wine.

Among DD1's first words were cochalate and cocola

otoh my mum didn't let me near fizzy drinks or sweets, ever. So when I went to high school and had to buy my own dinner I went OTT and had various combinations of chocolate bars, haribo, strawberry shoelaces, and polo mints washed down with cola. Every schoolday for about seven years, lol

oOOOOF.

Very difficult. I'm pretty lucky I guess as my mum does stick to my rules. I did sort of give her the impression - it's my way or not at all. Of course I listen to all her advice and pearls of wisdom - and everyone else's but it's my decision and I love her that she does this for me.