To change date and venue of celebration

11 replies

brasserss · 03/12/2023 11:34

I will be celebrating a significant birthday in a couple of weeks. I sent a save the date to close family and friends and many will travel and have booked local hotels etc.
I am n w overcome by anxiety. Re thought of this overwhelms me. I am divorced and have gone through some
Scary health stuff over last few months.

I would still like to celebrate it but want to change to a much lower key event eg bar with music and finger food/ free bar from a large formal event.
The stress of the thought f it is in my head all day every day but I don't want to let anyone down especially if they're booked hotels and time off work.

I want to change the day also... a Friday to a Saturday.
Would I be very unfair and unreasonable to do this ?

OP posts:

mylittleprince · 03/12/2023 11:45

You have to keep the date the same but I wouldn't think changing the venue would be an issue as long as in the same location.

ExTheCheater · 03/12/2023 12:23

Yes you are unreasonable if you've sent a 'save the date' and people have booked hotels. Very unreasonable.

BarbedButterfly · 03/12/2023 12:25

You shouldn't change the date as people have booked travel and hotels

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 03/12/2023 12:25

People have booked hotels! People have made arrangements! You would be completely unreasonable to change now

LimeCheesecake · 03/12/2023 12:25

Changing the date is unreasonable if you know people have booked hotels. Changing the venue /level of fanciness is not unreasonable. (You could hint at cost of living being the reason so most people would understand you can’t afford the formal event)

Marmighty · 03/12/2023 12:26

Can you make the event more low key at the current planned location?

mynameiscalypso · 03/12/2023 12:27

I agree, I don't think you can change the date (and would be surprised if you were able to close to Christmas). It's fine to make it more low key though.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 03/12/2023 12:27

But you can only change the venue to somewhere that is close to the original venue. People will have booked hotels based on the proximity to the party.

Original poster

brasserss · 03/12/2023 12:38

So keep the date ? The Venue is very near the original one but a lot less formal and my friends and family can mingle in a more relaxed setting.
Thanks. I feel more settled about it now.

OP posts:

LimeCheesecake · 03/12/2023 13:39

Yes, change the venue, not the date, providing new venue isn’t miles from the old one.

WaltzingWaters · 03/12/2023 13:47

Definitely keep the date. I’d keep the venue too, unless the other is very very close by. I’d be very annoyed if I’d ordered a hotel that was in walking distance and it was changed to something further away. Of course I don’t know the details and if this would be an issue. Would people have bought fancy outfits to go with the original plans?

Flip