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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you’re in a highly paid job but do very little…

254 replies

Workbutba · 01/12/2023 12:07

Do you feel uncomfortable or worried? I earn over 60k. I know this isn’t loads but it’s obviously decent. Some days I do very little. That said there are times I will work a whole weekend or very late night so perhaps it evens out. But on Wednesday for example, I sent two emails and had two calls and then had a bath and tidied the house. I used to feel anxious about it/job security and was always asking my manager for more work etc but they are relaxed and say it ebbs and flows, which it does I suppose. The company makes big profits generally.

Is this common? I now have a dc so I worry even more about job security. I have a friend in a different industry who earns similar in management and she has days she can be on the phone to me for 3 hours and it doesn’t matter. I wonder how common this really is?!

OP posts:
madaboutmad · 02/12/2023 10:59

Winterday1991 · 02/12/2023 09:25

Why would anyone share this with someone off the internet. People want to gate keep these roles for themselves, not have to compete with a wider pool of people.

What nonsense. It’s a market place like any other, not a secret society. I’m a Chartered IFA by training (19 professional exams), I now work with wealthy families. I am responsible for 10’s of Millions of other peoples money. Some of my colleagues suffer with stress as the headwinds of global economic crisis hit. Not everyone can do it. Women are very good at my role, but less than 10% of my industry are women.

oddgirl · 02/12/2023 11:09

i think it’s really important that women don’t bash each other in a professional capacity: god knows it’s hard enough in any workplace culture to get our voices heard. I do think that it’s interesting that traditionally female jobs such as teaching/ nursing are not valued as of high enough importance or responsibility to receive appropriate monetary value. Now of course there are arguments that these careers are more flexible in terms of childcare (although I’d argue there’s nothing child friendly about a 12 and a half hour night shift). I think it suits society to box professions such as nursing and teaching into not very skilled and therefore lower paid careers. I’m sure it’s true of teaching too but nursing has undergone a revolution over the past 50 years demanding degree/masters level education and highly technical as well as emotional skills. Yet there remains a perception that nurses make beds and change nappies and therefore their pay is reflected in this. I’m not asking for anyone else to have their salary reduced, I’m not asking others to justify their salary. I know that choice of career is mine alone. However no one in my teenagers’ generation wants to be a teacher or a nurse as they (understandably) want to chase a career with high earning potential. This is already causing a catastrophic staff shortage of teachers/nurses and if the Covid pandemic taught us anything it is these people who actually keep society functioning at its most basic level.

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 11:17

ShirleyPhallus · 02/12/2023 10:57

another poster has listed many of these highly paid jobs

these threads always go the same way. Barely anyone actually wants to know how to get in these jobs, it’s lots of sniping and a healthy dose of jealousy

It’s always the same. The rich assume everyone must want what they have and therefore anyone daring to criticise their life choices is ‘jealous’. And who could blame them? Society largely supports this view. We’re all supposed to be money-driven and sneer at people who choose jobs that help people. Doesn’t make it right though, does it?

ShirleyPhallus · 02/12/2023 11:21

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 11:17

It’s always the same. The rich assume everyone must want what they have and therefore anyone daring to criticise their life choices is ‘jealous’. And who could blame them? Society largely supports this view. We’re all supposed to be money-driven and sneer at people who choose jobs that help people. Doesn’t make it right though, does it?

I’ve said repeatedly that some lower paid professions, like nurses, teachers etc should be paid better

if you aren’t jealous of someone doing a 6 figure job in half of a working week then do move on, that comment isn’t aimed at you, but it’s clear from many of the comments here that they are

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 11:23

ShirleyPhallus · 02/12/2023 11:21

I’ve said repeatedly that some lower paid professions, like nurses, teachers etc should be paid better

if you aren’t jealous of someone doing a 6 figure job in half of a working week then do move on, that comment isn’t aimed at you, but it’s clear from many of the comments here that they are

Actually quite a lot of people on this thread sound angry, rather than jealous. And rightly so, I think.

LittleMissUnreasonable · 02/12/2023 11:26

I think threads like this are why people who work as carers on £20k a year get annoyed when someone says they earn 6 figures because they "work hard"
It also painfully demonstrates the balance of pay in the UK when some of our hardest workers out in all weathers and situations get a pittance when the 6 figure earners could easily do their weeks worth of work 'in a day'. Then there comes the faux headscratching from high earners on why people are so resentful....

madaboutmad · 02/12/2023 11:27

OneMoreStepAlongTheRoadIGo · 02/12/2023 09:01

So in terms of advising kids? Where do they start?

Barriers to entry is the key i.e training. Ambition.
Flexibility.
EQ.

Or insight to a new idea.

I’m afraid, luck and a bit of native wit also matter.

AnnaMagnani · 02/12/2023 11:32

Not knowing what the careers are is a big barrier. Plus expense of training.

My grandparents told my DM they couldn't afford for her to stay at school so that was it.

alwaysmovingforwards · 02/12/2023 11:45

LittleMissUnreasonable · 02/12/2023 11:26

I think threads like this are why people who work as carers on £20k a year get annoyed when someone says they earn 6 figures because they "work hard"
It also painfully demonstrates the balance of pay in the UK when some of our hardest workers out in all weathers and situations get a pittance when the 6 figure earners could easily do their weeks worth of work 'in a day'. Then there comes the faux headscratching from high earners on why people are so resentful....

Edited

Has always been that way and always will.

Unless you'd like to give communism a whirl 😆

ilovesooty · 02/12/2023 11:46

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 11:23

Actually quite a lot of people on this thread sound angry, rather than jealous. And rightly so, I think.

That's certainly how I feel. I'm self employed now and pick and choose when I work so no jealousy here. I've never had a job like those described and I don't think I'd have wanted one, but it certainly has made me feel angry. I think the poster who referred to disrespect for anything socially useful had a point.

klajs · 02/12/2023 12:04

My role is pretty highly paid and I certainly don't work as "physically" hard as I did in my entry level roles, but it's because my role very much relies on my experience and decision making capacity which has taken time to develop. When I was entry level that involved being customer facing, there was a physical element, lack of flexibility, much busier. Over the last 15+ years I've been working, I've learned and implemented the area of legislation I specialise in so I know it very well. My employer pays me well because I can quickly and relatively precisely give them the advice they need which whilst only being one person, supports multi million pound high impact programmes, it's valuable to them. It's easy for me because it's what I do, it's taken years to get to this point, to replace me you'd need a similarly qualified and experienced person of which there aren't huge numbers of us and there is your pay demand.

Is it fair, no I suppose not if you compare me to a carer who works much harder than me on a day to day basis, it is hugely valuable work, but that's not how our economy works.

My advice to some who wants to earn well with relative ease would be to go into a field where your skillset is in demand, has an impact on the organisation with limited numbers (of roles). Those are the roles organisations are willing and able to pay highly for and you can rely on your expertise.

sep135 · 02/12/2023 12:09

Basically - it’s your own fault you’re poor. Is that you Rishi?

Erm, no, although I wouldn't say no to his family wealth.

That's not what I was saying. My point is that you know your likely salary when you start a career. If I wanted to maximise my earnings, it would be in investment banking, private equity or corporate law, not being a teacher or nurse.

That's not to denigrate their contribution to society in any way. But we all make a choice as to what we prioritise when we pick our career path. It might be societal importance, flexible working or put bluntly, the money.

I genuinely couldn't be a nurse as I don't have the right qualities and credit to those that do. By the same token, not everyone could work in highly paid FS roles and the uber high earners I've worked with have justified their salaries and bonuses because they offer particular skills in high demand.

senua · 02/12/2023 12:15

Choosing your profession solely on the amount of money you stand to make from it is a weird choice, but whatever. I grew up poor too but my takeaway from the experience wasn’t that making money should be my primary goal in life, mainly because that’s quite an empty, pointless goal in my view.
This doesn't make sense. You think that 'making money' shouldn't be your primary goal but then get upset when you don't get paid as much as others? You made your choice so you live with the consequences.
I'm another who didn't have a cushty start in life so I decided to go for a secure, well-paid career. Guess what - I'm well-paid!

Anyway, it's basic economics; the law of supply and demand. If only a few people can do the job then they will be relatively well-paid. If there are thousands of people who can do the job (teachers, nurses) then they don't have the same scarcity value.

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 12:17

sep135 · 02/12/2023 12:09

Basically - it’s your own fault you’re poor. Is that you Rishi?

Erm, no, although I wouldn't say no to his family wealth.

That's not what I was saying. My point is that you know your likely salary when you start a career. If I wanted to maximise my earnings, it would be in investment banking, private equity or corporate law, not being a teacher or nurse.

That's not to denigrate their contribution to society in any way. But we all make a choice as to what we prioritise when we pick our career path. It might be societal importance, flexible working or put bluntly, the money.

I genuinely couldn't be a nurse as I don't have the right qualities and credit to those that do. By the same token, not everyone could work in highly paid FS roles and the uber high earners I've worked with have justified their salaries and bonuses because they offer particular skills in high demand.

By underpaying people in the caring professions, as a society we denigrate their contribution. You might personally think they should earn more, but the system we are all part of is encouraging the complete opposite view.

Also, just to say - the only reason people in high earning professions can do what they do and make their money is because others in society aren’t demanding a similar share of the pie. Well, some of them are and good for them. Our public services workers are the infrastructure of our country; without them, things would go completely tits up.

Bitchassmosquito · 02/12/2023 12:19

My role pays about 50k. It’s a specialist role so you have to know what you’re doing but it’s easy when you know how, so I wouldn’t say it was hard work. I certainly don’t work long hours overtime or anything like that.

My role is useful though so I don’t feel too guilty.

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 12:23

senua · 02/12/2023 12:15

Choosing your profession solely on the amount of money you stand to make from it is a weird choice, but whatever. I grew up poor too but my takeaway from the experience wasn’t that making money should be my primary goal in life, mainly because that’s quite an empty, pointless goal in my view.
This doesn't make sense. You think that 'making money' shouldn't be your primary goal but then get upset when you don't get paid as much as others? You made your choice so you live with the consequences.
I'm another who didn't have a cushty start in life so I decided to go for a secure, well-paid career. Guess what - I'm well-paid!

Anyway, it's basic economics; the law of supply and demand. If only a few people can do the job then they will be relatively well-paid. If there are thousands of people who can do the job (teachers, nurses) then they don't have the same scarcity value.

Actual nonsense. If teachers and doctors are so easily replaced, can you please explain the chronic shortages of both?

I’m angry that we as a society value making as much money as humanly possible, rather than doing something actually valuable. And that we deny even a basic standard of living to people doing caring work and therefore I want them to be paid enough to live well. I can hold both views, funnily enough. I appreciate that’s difficult to understand if you’ve bought into the money is God theory though.

theemmadilemma · 02/12/2023 12:28

Just under 60k, I need to generally be available 9-5, but depending on what going on I can have very little to do. Sometimes it's early starts and late finishes.

I don't feel bad, I'm paid for my knowledge and experience.

BigTubOfLard · 02/12/2023 12:41

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 10:40

Wow. Imagine being so entitled that you can’t imagine there is some luck involved in your life. Well, you don’t have to imagine because you’re living it, obvs. Hope you never have to experience random life-changing misfortune. Although a comfortable income and cast-iron belief in your own agency probably helps there.

Also, a career in IT = fun - sure, maybe? Depending on your idea of fun? Not for me though, ta.

Actually working in IT 'is' my idea of fun. I looked at becoming an English teacher as I enjoyed English at school, but it looked high stress and didn't pay much. So I pivoted and became a technical author instead - still working with the English language but for better pay and less stress.

Luck plays a part in everybody's lives, as you point out, but my career choice was not a matter of luck. I'll ask you again, what was your choice?

TheLocust · 02/12/2023 14:56

I can't help thinking that if this was a men's forum discussing this they'd all be patting themselves on the back and high-fiving each other. But as women we have to pull each other down, blame high earning women for all is wrong in society.

BigTubOfLard · 02/12/2023 14:58

TheLocust · 02/12/2023 14:56

I can't help thinking that if this was a men's forum discussing this they'd all be patting themselves on the back and high-fiving each other. But as women we have to pull each other down, blame high earning women for all is wrong in society.

I concur.

Chaitales · 02/12/2023 15:15

TheLocust · 02/12/2023 14:56

I can't help thinking that if this was a men's forum discussing this they'd all be patting themselves on the back and high-fiving each other. But as women we have to pull each other down, blame high earning women for all is wrong in society.

Agree. I think we can make a thread asking for career help etc rather than just dissing each other.

EasternStandard · 02/12/2023 15:17

Chaitales · 02/12/2023 15:15

Agree. I think we can make a thread asking for career help etc rather than just dissing each other.

Agree

MarryingMrDarcy · 02/12/2023 15:40

TheLocust · 02/12/2023 14:56

I can't help thinking that if this was a men's forum discussing this they'd all be patting themselves on the back and high-fiving each other. But as women we have to pull each other down, blame high earning women for all is wrong in society.

Errr, nah. Probably not if the men involved were rabid communists like myself! 😘

ilovesooty · 02/12/2023 15:54

If someone is doing a job where they're raking it in and and just wafting around for much of the time until their individual moments of brilliance are needed I don't care whether they're male or female.

ClafoutisSurprise · 02/12/2023 20:23

Winterday1991 · 02/12/2023 09:25

Why would anyone share this with someone off the internet. People want to gate keep these roles for themselves, not have to compete with a wider pool of people.

I doubt canyons is worried about gatekeeping. Nobody just walks into a high-paying job, let alone one of the minority of these jobs that involves little actual effort. It is, however, useless offering job functions and titles that fit the criteria since working conditions and compensation for roles change so much over time, as well as varying across organisations. It would be futile for a child to plan to do X role because it’s cushy when it will have inevitably changed beyond all recognition by the time they’re working age.

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