OCD, anxiety and intrusive thoughts

[Khanny]

Not me but my poor husband is really really struggling at the moment. He has a psychiatrist but the appointments are very few and far between. He won't take medication due to the anxiety side of his mental health and the time he did take quetiapine he was convinced they were making him forget things so he stopped them.

Long story short he had a very traumatic and sometimes abusive childhood and the result of that is extreme anger which can come on so quickly and over nothing, and he has been diagnosed with OCD and anxiety but now the intrusive thoughts seem to be taking over his everything at the moment. A lot of them are about me, and him thinking I don't love him, thinking I've had better than him in my youth, he imagines me with other men in my youth and this gets him into such an angry state of mind and nothing I say or do changes it. I don't know how to help him deal with the intrusive thoughts and would appreciate any help or advice because I am finding this all very very difficult x

I know it can be very hard for OCD sufferers to open up and engage with treatment. I don't want to minimise that. But I think it's the only way. You are exhausted and distressed from trying to support him, when even your best efforts are just not nearly enough.

For some reason I keep picturing this situation as a bit like that scene in Titanic when Rose is on the raft. You are on your raft. Your husband can either find his raft and climb onto it, or he can cling onto yours until he weighs it down so much that it goes under and you both go down with it.

Hi, therapist here!
I think he should be seeking a therapist who specialises in OCD and ERP therapy in particular. Good luck

@Gudrunnn Thank you, what a great description! Very true, I do often feel drained by trying to hold him up.

@Question10 Thank you, I have made bullet points of what I see to pass on to his psychiatrist or gp (whoever we see first!). He is very open with the professionals but its on their lead so if they are not asking about certain things, then he won't think to bring it up. I have a bullet pointed list of what I see in him so that hopefully that can guide things. Will look up ERP therapist xx