I'm on cyclical hrt for a horrid peri. Daily Estrogel and utrogestan for 10-12 days of cycle. Have a history of horrid pmdd ( suicidal thoughts, self harming). Life's been busy and mental and I forgot to take the progesterone for 3 months and I've never felt better. I literally felt incredible. Loads of stuff going on , managing to cope with it, slept and felt well, brilliant with kids and work etc. However this month I thought I must remember as that can't be healthy. Towards the end of the ten day session I felt sick as a dog, really nauseous. Then I stopped taking it ( on the correct day) and turned into a lunatic and fell apart. Ive been suicidal, unable to cope with anything at all, and my old enemy, thoughts of self harm, have been creeping in. I can't do this last week again. I'd rather die tbh. So my aibu is, can I just take Estrogel and not progesterone long term so I can feel like I did for those wonderful three months?