Long distance relationship

[PennysLane]

Me and my partner live an hour away. Several kids between us. I have set schedule with my ex when kids go to him. He has a loose one. And one kid living with him full time. Teenager.

Been together almost 2 years.

But lately it’s me doing the vast majority of the travelling. It’s like he just CBA. He’s perfect in every other way. Except the distance and his teenager who stays with him.

inexpert him to put his kids first. But I don’t think he has time for a relationship.

But also I’ve never been in a Relationship that has kids so I am totally out of my depth.

please unravel this for me.

Have you voiced this to him ?

Yes. He came up with some solutions but they haven’t exactly materialised

I wouldn't call an hour away, a long distance relationship, but I guess it depends on how often you see each other.

Obviously you do both have to make it work around your kids though. How old is the teeneager? There's a quite a difference between just turned 13 and 18/19 in terms of how independent they are likely to be.

Does he visit you when he can, or does he expect you to go to him, whether his child is there or not? If he's not bothering even if he could, it's at least worth raising it with him that it's making you feel he isn't prepared to make much effort. Though it might turn out that he really isn't prepared to make the effort, but that's OK too as at least then you'd know and can decide what you want to do.

Child not quite able to stay home alone yet. He has other kids too much younger who stay with mother predominantly.

He promises a wonderful future. But I’m not sure if that’s to keep me hooked. And that future isn’t anything I’m incapable of achieving myself.

im so on the cusp of ending this. But he really is the most kind gentle respectful man. We get along so, so well.

I don't really think this is a long-distance relationship. He's only an hour away; it's really not that far.

If his son lives with him fulltime and isn't old enough (or can't be trusted) to fend for himself for the weekend, then obviously your boyfriend isn't going to be able to spend the weekend at your house very often, if at all. So I think if that's something you're finding difficult, it would be better to end the relationship now.

I don't think either of you is doing anything wrong here; I think your situations just aren't compatible.

I know 😔