Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

School attendance

57 replies

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 09:30

Posting for traffic not really AIBU sorry.

So I received a letter on DD's book bag yesterday sent out yesterday regarding her attendance, as stated she was off all last week as advised by school as she was vomiting and then after that finished had diarrhoea.

(We've also had a few days scattered off as we caught covid and school states child be kept off for three days after positive test )

Aswell as general bugs which have gave a fever, DD didn't attend nursery so her immune system took a harsh hit when joining school.

The letter states I have a legal responsibility to ensure full time education once a child reaches statutory school age.

Am I wrong in thinking 5 is actually the legal school age? And any attendance made by pupils under 5 is disregarded for the school year? She is a late July so won't turn 5 until six weeks Summer holidays.

OP posts:
Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 09:58

Geneve82 · 28/11/2023 09:56

was there any specific reason why you chose for DD not attend nursery?

There was no free hours available in our area and nursery was quoting £800 a month for childcare, which I simply couldn't afford, I work nights anyway, so I could care for her myself.

OP posts:
Geneve82 · 28/11/2023 09:58

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 09:55

I don't view this as a personal attack, I'm simply asking where you stand if your child is under 5 🤦🏻‍♀️

so if i had a child under 5
who bad had lots of time off during 2.5 months of their first ever year of school
and i received a letter like this

i would be happy my child was attending a school where they were actually offering me practical support.

and that is as far as i’d think about it

Geneve82 · 28/11/2023 10:00

they can opt out of offering 30 hours

but they have to offer 15 hours

just in case you have a second

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 10:01

Geneve82 · 28/11/2023 10:00

they can opt out of offering 30 hours

but they have to offer 15 hours

just in case you have a second

Won't be having anymore children.

The only 15 free hour nurseries was completely fully booked, or had low reports.

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 28/11/2023 10:04

They have to send the letter.

If she's ill, she's ill. The school has to be SEEN to be trying to sort it.

I had hoped Covid would have sorted the school sickness absence nonsense but it hasn't.

Allotmenthelp · 28/11/2023 10:08

A few children in my DCs class actually chose to go part time until statutory school age. I wouldn’t worry, hopefully her immune system builds up quickly and she will need less time off when she is 5 anyway.

Lougle · 28/11/2023 10:08

She is under compulsory school age.

Working Together to Improve School Attendance

  1. Schools must record whether the absence of a pupil of compulsory school age is authorised or not. There is no requirement for schools to record whether the absence of pupils not of compulsory school age is authorised or not, but where possible schools should use the national attendance and absence codes to help them monitor their attendance and to form good attendance habits.

However, you may have signed an agreement to say that you will ensure good attendance.

The school isn't wrong to remind you of the impact of absence on education, but they can't enforce any absence procedures on you such as fixed penalty notices, because your child is under compulsory school age.

https://www.google.com/url?opi=89978449&rct=j&sa=t&source=web&url=https%3A%2F%2Fassets.publishing.service.gov.uk%2Fgovernment%2Fuploads%2Fsystem%2Fuploads%2Fattachment_data%2Ffile%2F1099677%2FWorking_together_to_improve_school_attendance.pdf&usg=AOvVaw15gc_BIFeWwhIxxQcfJLI9&ved=2ahUKEwisx5-JuOaCAxULTEEAHRP1BoIQFnoECBYQAQ

keye · 28/11/2023 10:12

I would actually challenge the 3 day Covid thing? What's the reason for it?

FriendsInAllThePlaces · 28/11/2023 10:12

As long as you’re sending your child when she’s well, getting medical treatment where appropriate, then just ignore them. You could show willing and engage with the school nurse but they’re unlikely to offer anything useful and above what your GP has provided. Most children have less illnesses once they about 7 ime.

When it comes to attendance and school, get used to rolling your eyes because it’s all a load of bullshit. Schools seem to say ‘Don’t send your child in when they’re ill but make sure they’re here everyday.’ Even the staff know it’s ridiculous.

Don’t get caught up in legalities and debates of what age your child has to attend school. You’ll send her when she’s well and that’s the end of it.

ImNotAsThinkAsYouDrunkIAm · 28/11/2023 10:13

The answer to your question OP is that she is not statutory school age.

I’d just email the school back with 2 bullet points: that she is not statutory school age, and that she has been kept off school in accordance with the school’s sickness policy.

Don’t feel the need to take them up on their ‘helpful’ offer to see the school nurse. It’s just box ticking. It’s all about attendance now, and schools are having to jump through pointless hoops to show that they are Doing Something About It. They’ve ticked their box by sending you a letter. Just tick your box by responding, and then move on with your life :)

Fairtobefairohhhhhc · 28/11/2023 10:17

It's a generic letter OP. I had one and it was because they kept sending him home every time he had a cough. Just after covid. I wasn't allowed to keep him off too much but also wasn't allowed to keep him in when he got a cough or cold in winter. It was a bit too contradicting. In the end I sent him in every time and let them send him home. I receuved that letter asking if there's anything they can help with. I spoke to his teacher amd she said they have to send it for ofsted.i jokingly said if they want to help, they can stop sending him home for a cough. She agreed.

Just bin the letter. If it was more serious it wouldn't be that generic one and they would want a meeting with you.

I'm more impressed your school has a school nurse tbh

RosyappleA · 28/11/2023 10:19

Nursery was a massive shock for me I thought I had a great immune system
until DD went to nursery. She was always ill, September to March it was awful and I was too even though I am constantly exposed to everything due to work. I was planning on working more but I ended up working less due to sickness. Not once did I get such a letter though. Ignore it. Yes legal age limit is 5.

WowOK · 28/11/2023 10:24

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 09:55

I don't view this as a personal attack, I'm simply asking where you stand if your child is under 5 🤦🏻‍♀️

They can't do anything. You don't have to send her. You have NO statutory responsibility to send her.

Irisborn · 28/11/2023 10:26

Wow so many messages and nothing yet answering the OP’s actual question 😂

OP, assuming you are in England:

Your child reaches ‘compulsory school age’ (CSA) on the first day of the term after she turns 5. So, if she is summer born she is not CSA until the first day of year 1.

When a child misses school, the school is legally required to put an absence code for her on the register. Before she is CSA, they use a code that means ‘attendance not required because child is not CSA’. That code can be used an infinite number of times, she could even miss all of reception year and there would be no legal consequence for you or the school. We chose to do half weeks until my child was CSA. (Why? Because I felt like it, and because she learned more at home than at school. We only sent her to school for the social side.) Your child is not yet CSA so you can ignore this letter. As she is below CSA school shouldn’t really have sent you the standard ‘absence letter’ at all, but often school staff don’t understand the rukes.

After your child reaches CSA, things change a great deal. She must be either home educated, or registered at a school. If she is on the register at a school, then you are legally required to send her to the school site every day (and it is a criminal offence not to) unless the school authorise an absence. They have a list of specific situations where they can authorise absence. The main situation is illness but they can also eg authorise children to be absent because on a school trip.

So, after she is CSA, when you tell school that she is ill, you are requesting that they authorise an absence. Usually they do this but if the child is ill a lot they may stop believing you and refuse to authorise, in which case you get fined (£60 per parent per half day session).

In general just be charming and friendly with school even when they’re being dicks, it is so much more helpful to you in future. If I was in your situation I would write back saying something like thanks for your letter, yes we are all very sad that DD has been so ill this term and we hope things improve, we don’t need any support as we are in touch with our GP about DD, we’ll let you know if that changes, in the meantime please do ensure that her absences are recorded on the register with the correct code for a child who is below compulsory school age and thus not legally required to attend all sessions, many thanks.

Hope that helps.

CornedBeef451 · 28/11/2023 10:29

Just bin it. I had one for DD as she was off for at least half of October but it was due to Covid and she was really ill with it, then a post viral migraine.

I know how annoying it is but it's generally a standard letter and they have to send it.

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 10:29

Irisborn · 28/11/2023 10:26

Wow so many messages and nothing yet answering the OP’s actual question 😂

OP, assuming you are in England:

Your child reaches ‘compulsory school age’ (CSA) on the first day of the term after she turns 5. So, if she is summer born she is not CSA until the first day of year 1.

When a child misses school, the school is legally required to put an absence code for her on the register. Before she is CSA, they use a code that means ‘attendance not required because child is not CSA’. That code can be used an infinite number of times, she could even miss all of reception year and there would be no legal consequence for you or the school. We chose to do half weeks until my child was CSA. (Why? Because I felt like it, and because she learned more at home than at school. We only sent her to school for the social side.) Your child is not yet CSA so you can ignore this letter. As she is below CSA school shouldn’t really have sent you the standard ‘absence letter’ at all, but often school staff don’t understand the rukes.

After your child reaches CSA, things change a great deal. She must be either home educated, or registered at a school. If she is on the register at a school, then you are legally required to send her to the school site every day (and it is a criminal offence not to) unless the school authorise an absence. They have a list of specific situations where they can authorise absence. The main situation is illness but they can also eg authorise children to be absent because on a school trip.

So, after she is CSA, when you tell school that she is ill, you are requesting that they authorise an absence. Usually they do this but if the child is ill a lot they may stop believing you and refuse to authorise, in which case you get fined (£60 per parent per half day session).

In general just be charming and friendly with school even when they’re being dicks, it is so much more helpful to you in future. If I was in your situation I would write back saying something like thanks for your letter, yes we are all very sad that DD has been so ill this term and we hope things improve, we don’t need any support as we are in touch with our GP about DD, we’ll let you know if that changes, in the meantime please do ensure that her absences are recorded on the register with the correct code for a child who is below compulsory school age and thus not legally required to attend all sessions, many thanks.

Hope that helps.

THANK YOU!

Yes I do understand everyone's else's posts but this wasn't about if it was a personal attack or reasons why she didn't go to nursery or why my work requires testing 🤦🏻‍♀️

But thank you so much. This was so helpful.

OP posts:
QueenBean22 · 28/11/2023 10:33

What is her attendance percentage? It will automatically trigger as a concern below a certain level.

It’s more of a safeguarding thing I think,

FriendsInAllThePlaces · 28/11/2023 10:37

But if you get involved in conversations about the legalities with them, you’ll just end up frustrated and not having a good relationship with the school. They already know about compulsory school age.

You have chosen to send her before it’s compulsory so just send her when she’s well and ignore the rest.

YorkshirePuddingBelongs · 28/11/2023 10:38

I’m a petty bastard so I’d have written in the back “So sorry. I’ll send her in vomiting next time. You’re welcome”

Seekingguidance22 · 28/11/2023 10:39

YorkshirePuddingBelongs · 28/11/2023 10:38

I’m a petty bastard so I’d have written in the back “So sorry. I’ll send her in vomiting next time. You’re welcome”

😂😂😂😂

That would waste my time even more I'd be then going in half hour later to get her 🤣

OP posts:
PianPianPiano · 28/11/2023 10:41

Fairtobefairohhhhhc · 28/11/2023 10:17

It's a generic letter OP. I had one and it was because they kept sending him home every time he had a cough. Just after covid. I wasn't allowed to keep him off too much but also wasn't allowed to keep him in when he got a cough or cold in winter. It was a bit too contradicting. In the end I sent him in every time and let them send him home. I receuved that letter asking if there's anything they can help with. I spoke to his teacher amd she said they have to send it for ofsted.i jokingly said if they want to help, they can stop sending him home for a cough. She agreed.

Just bin the letter. If it was more serious it wouldn't be that generic one and they would want a meeting with you.

I'm more impressed your school has a school nurse tbh

The school nurse is an NHS role (at least in england) - not employed by the school themselves: https://www.healthcareers.nhs.uk/explore-roles/public-health/roles-public-health/school-nurse - so everyone should have access to one.

DoIReallyNeedToDoThis · 28/11/2023 10:47

As I understand it, if you accept the offer of a full time place before your child turns 5, you are bound by all the rules, including attendance.

Foxesandsquirrels · 28/11/2023 11:06

DoIReallyNeedToDoThis · 28/11/2023 10:47

As I understand it, if you accept the offer of a full time place before your child turns 5, you are bound by all the rules, including attendance.

That's not true, even if it's school policy. Policy doesn't trump law.

Commonwasher · 28/11/2023 11:12

@Irisborn great answer. So many judgey questions!

Your child doesn’t need to be in school yet OP so you can file that one in the recycler.

Just as a general tip from someone who has had these letters before and got mighty offended by them — take these letters with a pinch of salt, they are not personal. Of course you can keep your child at home if they are not well enough to go to school, and at that age (whether they’ve gone to nursery or not) they will likely catch a lot of bugs.

The school policy will be to notify all parents periodically of attendance below the target percentage, it’s required by ofsted. Unfortunately the standard letters are always really officious and I tend to feel they accuse me of bad parenting, but everyone gets the same! If you only send your kid to school when you feel like it, you will get the same letter as the parent who’s trying to get their child into school but their kid catches V&D every other week.

Hope your kiddy now has built up some resilience to bugs, but these things will happen — I have both my kids off with vomiting today so I’m waiting for two letters, one from each school… 🙄

Swipe left for the next trending thread