I see shit on here all the time directed at resident parents. That they shouldn't ever date because they must dedicate all their time to their children. That they knew what they were signing up for because we picked useless men and it's our fault.
This isn't what I signed up for. Ex and I dated for several years. Thought long and hard about the future and discussed things. Got married. Bought house. No hint of any issues that I can recall. We were equals. When dc1 was born I remember midwife writing down how supportive he was.
We split 3 years ago. He has had more jobs since then than I've had in the last 10 years. He is behind on maintenance. I have a good job, a career that I juggle around 2 primary age kids. Since we split up he has focused entirely on his happiness and sex life. He's had more relationships since the split than I've had in my whole life. I have paid out a shit load of money this year to buy him out the house, divorce and remortgage fees, he has contributed nothing. I just checked my bank account and yet again he hasn't paid the maintenance. I am sick of chasing him for the bare minimum and telling him to see his children more than once a fortnight. It is exhausting. I feel like I am under his control. I don't think it's going to improve. I wish I didn't feel so low about him and his choices. I wish it didn't affect me. This really isn't what I thought my life would be. 😫