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AIBU?

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Original poster

To wonder why teenagers won't wear coats

108 replies

littlefifi · 27/11/2023 19:24

Minus figures this week and yet my 12 year old ds refuses to wear a coat or jumper because apparently other kids pick on kids who wear them? Is this a thing? Is being cold a cause for bullying now? He only started high school in September so I'm still learning the rules.

He wears a blazer but only a thin cotton shirt goes underneath. In full embarrassing mum fashion I can't stand to think of him walking to school in only that and being cold but I'm obviously not going to insist either, it's up to him.

Who would have thought coats were for the weak?

OP posts:
fruitpastille · 27/11/2023 19:29

It varies. They wear them at schools round here. Mine will only wear a thin waterproof though as they don't want to carry anything bulky round inside school.

You could buy a base layer from decathlon/ mountain warehouse for under his shirt. Would he wear a hat/ scarf/ gloves?

Shouldbehoovering · 27/11/2023 19:35

Thus explained…

To wonder why teenagers won't wear coats
Octavia64 · 27/11/2023 19:37

This has been a thing for at least 30 years.

(Old gimmer)

In the north they never grow out of it. I remember moving south in my 20s and being amazed that adults wore coats on nights out.

SgtJuneAckland · 27/11/2023 19:37

I hear this on MN all the time but the teens around here all seem to wear coats over their uniforms, from the grammars to the rough comps. Maybe because big puffy coats are good for hiding knives, who knows....

TwilightSkies · 27/11/2023 19:37

Social suicide according to my teen. Same as carrying an umbrella.

Mothership4two · 27/11/2023 19:38

Mine were the same. I managed to get them to wear a black hoodie under their blazers, but they had to take it off as soon as they got to school as it wasn't the official school uniform.

EasterMummie · 27/11/2023 19:39

I think its partly because they have to then lug it round with them all day. I'd feel similar I think if I was moving from place to place all the time.

Badbadbunny · 27/11/2023 19:40

It's no longer "normal" because most schools don't have lockers or cloakrooms anymore so kids have to carry them around, as well as their rucksack, sports kit, musical instrument, etc etc. They're usually not even allowed to wear them between lessons when going from one building to another.

Even back in my day at school (40+ years ago), we had cloakrooms, (no lockers) but it was risky to leave your coat in them because of the risk of theft/damage - nothing worse than going to pick it up at the end of the day to find it gone and then having to search for it, especially if you had limited time before your bus home departed! Just easier not to bother.

AlwaysFreezing · 27/11/2023 19:41

This is what thermal t shirts/vests are for!

DoktorPeppa · 27/11/2023 19:42

DD12 refuses to wear a coat unless it's raining, and that's only a very thin waterproof jacket. They don't have pegs at secondary so it has to fit in her bag. Bane of my life

Doyoumind · 27/11/2023 19:42

Coats acceptable around here for boys. Less so for girls, who are happy to freeze in their tiny skirts and thin tights, but I don't think wearing one would incite bullying.

cheezncrackers · 27/11/2023 19:43

12 is a difficult age - they're so young and susceptible to peer pressure and nonsense - my 12-year-old makes numerous incomprehensible sartorial choices (although he does wear a vest under his shirt in winter!) His 16 year-old DB has more sense and always wears a coat.

lilsupersparks · 27/11/2023 19:45

It varies by area I think. In the school where I teach every child has a black puffa jacket and getting them to take them off in lessons is out problem. Meanwhile I find my classroom absolutely baking!!

CharityShopChic · 27/11/2023 19:45

Doesn't get better when they are at uni. Went for lunch with 1st year uni DD today, it was 3.5C in Scotland. I had a vest, jumper and big wool coat.

DD was wearing a wee short sleeved crop vest top, and a pleather jacket which she can't even fasten. Complained she was cold, and I pointed out she might feel warmer with a different jacket. "But it's cute" was the reply.

VisionsOfSplendour · 27/11/2023 19:45

Doyoumind · 27/11/2023 19:42

Coats acceptable around here for boys. Less so for girls, who are happy to freeze in their tiny skirts and thin tights, but I don't think wearing one would incite bullying.

Same here, I drive past a huge secondary school on my way to work and see loads of coats on both boys and girls

However not wearing a coat is hardly a new thing, it happened when I was at school decades ago, some do, some dont, there's no hard and fast rule

Comedycook · 27/11/2023 19:46

When we had those boiling hot days last year...40 degrees...I saw some local school kids wearing full uniform including jumper and blazer and a puffer coat on top. How on earth they didn't faint I don't know?!

MrsHughesPinny · 27/11/2023 19:47

I left school 25 years ago and it was social suicide to wear a coat then too. Sign of weakness and of obeying the rules set forth by the olds!

Ridiculous. I wouldn’t do it, so me and my group of fellow coat-wearers were warm and dry but very definitely ostracised for the entire five years.

There was also a sanctioned way to wear your backpack (one-shoulder only, putting it on both = asking for a beating) and your socks. High school was so weird.

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 27/11/2023 19:48

My kids will wear coats as they really don't care about fitting in. But I see kids in blazers in pouring rain and all I can think is those blazers must start to stink of damp.

Girls rolling their skirts up so high their arses are hanging out is also the fashion in our area.

bluebeardswife7 · 27/11/2023 19:49

Maybe instead of a blazer (why?? Who wears a blazer to work now?) winter school uniform could include a light coat in black with a badge.

May09Bump · 27/11/2023 19:49

They wear them here - North Face coats seem the trend (at least the brand performs and washes ok). My teen moaned at wearing a coat - I took the stance that I'm not having this battle, the coat, hat, gloves are there when you admit your being an idiot, he got cold for a couple of days and then picked up the winter items and got on with it. It's very boring parenting teenagers sometimes.

Mirrormeback · 27/11/2023 19:50

My DS doesn't wear one because he gets to hot walking to school and back

He does have a waterproof pac a Mac fir when it rains

DD has about 10 different coats she wears in rotation

Original poster
littlefifi · 27/11/2023 19:51

He would wear gloves without any issues. A hard no to hats and scarves. I really thought jumpers under blazers would be ok but apparently that too is social suicide and clearly a waste of £20.

OP posts:
AHeadForHeights · 27/11/2023 19:52

Lol my 12 y old wears a bright neon yellow raincoat to school in winter!

bluebeardswife7 · 27/11/2023 19:52

In fact, I am all for school uniform, but a more practical version. Warm, cheap, comfortable.

StoleABibleAndShaggedThePriest · 27/11/2023 19:52

Kids here tend to start wearing coats again in year 10 and 11. Mum of year 10 girl and an older lad.

Younger than that, boys wear a base layer under their shirt and cardigans are acceptable for girls here.