To stop potty training for now?

[Aerialturns]

Posting for traffic as need to make a decision …

DS will wee if you tell him to sit on the potty , lots of praise. But without prompting him to sit on the potty he just wets himself, there’s no ‘I need a wee.’

I am not really sure what to do because he just doesn’t seem to be getting it.

Thanks @BuffaloCauliflower thats probably best. Nursery not been massively helpful tbh

I usually found after a few days of doing this started to get some control and be able to go for longer and then would take themselves. If not happening by a couple of weeks I would just wait another 3 months

Personally at nearly 3 I would keep trying, some children find it difficult no matter what age. What worked for my ds who had a few failed attempts was to stay in the house over a long weekend, keep him bare from the waist down so he could see when he was having an accident and eventually stop himself and go to the potter. If he's in clothes it's hard for him to know he is going.

Give him (and you) a break for a few weeks then start again.

In the early days having to prompt is to be expected so I wouldn’t take that as a sign he’s not ready. He’s still learning to control and feel the muscles, so based on what you’re describing, I’d bet on he’s not fully emptying his bladder when you take him. So that’s why you’re getting an accident very soon afterwards. I would sit him on the loo/potty then after he’s gone get him to have a wiggle and jump around before trying again. When you need to leave for nursery take him 10 minutes before and right as you’re walking out the door. Once you’ve got him emptying his bladder fully you can increase the intervals between taking him- once you can manage an hour everything becomes so much easier, especially with boys as they can always wee behind a tree in the park!

Self initiation will come with time. My youngest is 2 years 9 months, he trained right around his 2 birthday and still doesn’t really initiate. But he doesn’t have accidents so long as we take him every 2 hours. Maybe some wouldn’t consider him fully potty trained but we don’t have to buy nappies or take spare clothes out with us so I’ll take it! My eldest trained a bit later and I’d say 3.5 was about when she took more ownership of it.

I do think children need to learn that they don’t actually like being wet and it isn’t a choice to use the loo. Some kids really don’t care and if you waited for them to be ready, they never would be. My eldest was closer to 3 before she trained, was as stubborn as a mule, did not care at all as thought the toilet just got in the way or playing, lots of accidents etc but we got there eventually. Absolutely needed consistency and support from nursery but also needed her to want to do it. Biggest thing was making sure cleaning up after accidents took just as long if not longer than going to the loo. At 3 I wouldn’t keep delaying it otherwise your window before school gets shorter and shorter.

My youngest did it just after 2. Developmentally I think the younger one wasn’t yet in the power play phase and just cracked on. She needed much more help physically in terms of sitting on the toilet, getting her clothes up etc so should have been harder than the eldest but was much easier.

I would give it a break. I tried my son a month before he turned 3 and he didn't get it so we stopped. A month later he trained himself in a day completely unprompted, he was just ready. He had zero accidents after that first day so it was definitely worth waiting to avoid the accidents.

I would wait a while. DD potty trained at 2.5. DS was over 3. He just didn't know when a wee was coming and got upset about it. This then changed when he was 3;2 and he managed it quite easily with minimal accidents.

It sounds like your DS doesn't know yet and he is getting upset. I would put pull ups on and keep encouraging the potty, but then it's not unpleasant for him out the house. If he still doesn't get it in a few months, I would try when you can mostly be at home for a bit.