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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I expecting too much?

5 replies

MysticalMegx · 26/11/2023 15:05

Been with DP 7 years, one child together. Last year we got a dog, a very active breed that he chose, had dogs all my life I agreed she would be suitable for our very active lifestyle.
DP works long hours, sometimes 12-14 hours a day, 3 or 4 of which could be driving there and back (he works nationwide).
I also work, 8 hours a day. The novelty of walking the dog has been wearing off for him, meaning it's my job to walk him before he leaves while DD is in bed.
We also have a dog walker who comes at lunchtime to walk him. I get home from work and again walk the dog. Tidy up do washing etc.
HOWEVER on the odd time he finishes work early he'll come home and watch TV. Just watch the TV. Not walk the dog, or tidy round, or put the rubbish out or wash up if there is any. It's all left to me. So I work my 8 hours, do all the washing up, he mostly makes tea as he enjoys cooking.
His argument is he's been at work all day, but just because iv only been at work the hours before I start is spent rushing around getting DD ready for school, after work I spend time with DD doing homework etc.
I do all the washing, ironing, putting away. My weekends are spent doing housework. He sometimes works 6 days meaning he only has one day off during the weekend.
AIBU to think just because he works a few hours longer a day I have to do all the shit? He also doesn't expect me to do it all he does tell me to sit down and relax but I can't if there are jobs to do

OP posts:
OrigamiOwl · 26/11/2023 15:14

He needs to start pulling his weight.

It's almost like you've got another child to contend with...

Startrekkeruniverse · 26/11/2023 15:16

I just think it’s a shame you got an active breed of dog when you’re both out of the house for hours and hours every day. A dog walker visiting once at lunchtime isn’t enough.

MysticalMegx · 26/11/2023 15:26

We pay the dog walker 2 hours so he gets walked an hour in the morning, 2 hours at dinner and then another 1.5/2 hours in the field off lead after work which is ample exercise. Then on a weekend it's 2 long walks I'm usually out 3 hours each walk as we live close to moors where he runs wild and 2 shorter walks. The amount of exercise the dog gets isn't the issue here.

OP posts:
pictoosh · 26/11/2023 15:37

Agree with him that it's your choice to do little jobs instead of relaxing. It's up to you if you iron for example...I don't and wouldn't have any interest in it.

Think he's being a selfish twat about the dog. He wanted the breed so he can damn well pitch in with walking it.

MysticalMegx · 26/11/2023 15:44

If I don't do it it won't get done thats my point. When do I get chance to sit down and relax lol I never go back to work on a Monday well rested because there's always so much shit to do on a weekend. Surely I can't be the only one?

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