He ended it... how did I come across to him?

[Winterlandsky]

We had been together on and off for 2 years. We have never "officially" ended things until now. It was done via text message - which tbh does not bother me. Anyway back to my point. I was to my surprise very happy that it he ended it and also relieved. I enjoyed spending time with him etc but I could no longer see a future in us for many reasons.

It was a very short to the point message and I was not going to reply and just move on but something told me to just reply something. Therefore I asked why and also kind of sent a flirty message a few hours later. He didn't answer my question when I asked him why and i couldn't care less tbh. I have not contacted him since and nor do I wish to.

However I'm now thinking that he thinks he has got one over on me and his ego is even bigger. Should I have gone with my first thought and not even message him back? Do the messages I sent come across like I'm hurt or bothered?

To the poster that have said block him and don't message him again. I haven't blocked him as I know I will never be tempted to message him.

Without coming across as big headed as I'm really not but I know he will never get anyone as good as me and he will more than likely come to regret his decision. I on the other hand am happy he ended it as I probably wouldn't have and now I am free to meet someone else and get on with my life. It is so freeing.

I should have gone with my first thought in which I did actually just shrug my shoulders and was not even going to reply but I stupidly felt that it would come across that I didn't care (which I didn't). I'm just too nice sometimes 🙄

Female socialisation has a lot to answer for.

Don’t be nice next time.

Sounds like he may try to come back, don’t be nice to him again.

Is this the follow on to yesterday's drama? I feel like Mumsnet has turned into a soap opera these days

Can anyone link to the other thread?

Fair enough.

So why did you get with him on and off for two years? Sounds pointless for you.

If you didn’t care, then I would have replied something along the lines of - “thanks for letting me know and I agree that it’s for the best. Good luck for the future.”

I don’t believe that you aren’t hurt though and I think you do care.
Its ok to care.

What messages did you send him?

@Nowherenew I stupidly pretended that I do care because I thought it was the "right" thing to do since we had been intimate for so long. So I asked him why he wanted to end it as my thinking was that the "right" thing to do was see if it is anything he wants to resolve.
I'm WAY too nice🙃

Basically I was letting him think that I was putting up a bit of a fight for "us" rather than him thinking I Just didn't care. The second message was just me accepting that it was over in a "fun" way. So all very light hearted in my opinion.

At least that was my intention.

Ok well it’s done now and you can’t change it so you just have to accept it.

FWB is fine but it is a bit of a waste of time.
This guy has taken up 2 years of your life and now you can find someone else and not have to worry about hurting his feelings 🙂

The messages are not a big deal. It was very light hearted so I'm not worried about that. Looking back, he has done me a massive favour by letting me go and meet someone else. As I said earlier I wouldn't have ended it otherwise.

@PossumintheHouse At the beginning I thought he was amazing and then realised he is not and that he is not someone I want to be with long term. I carried it on for obvious reasons but was planning to end it once I met someone else.

Why are you asking this, OP?