Does anyone else get nervous / stressed before trip away?

[Cloud44]

Don’t go away often which is probably half the problem, but in theory in get excited about going away but when the time comes the closer it gets I feel quite nervous. We have a weekend away booked in a couple of months and I know I ll be worried about leaving the pets, what if we are poorly before going, just stupid things. Is anyone the same? Any advice? I’d let to feel more chilled and accept there’s no point in worrying about what you can’t control like illness.

It may just be me?!

No, not just you. I work myself up to an awful state in the weeks leading up to a holiday - to the point where I think it's not worth booking anything. I always enjoy it when we do go, but the lead up is terrible.
DH tends to make all the holiday arrangements, but I've realised that that I need to be more involved in this, to feel like I'm more in control - this has helped a bit with the last couple of trips we've done.

I am exactly the same.

I invariably enjoy it when we go though.

Only if we're going by public transport! I just don't trust trains, planes, even buses any more. Recently had trouble getting a taxi to the airport too, they were all too busy even to pick up the phone.

I’m exactly the same. I love going on holiday but the couple of days before I’d happily cancel. Once I’m at the airport I’m fine though.

Yes, me! I worry a lot about the house eg leaks, and I find packing very stressful in case I've left anything behind. I think I was always a bit like this even as a child but I'm worse since having the children as everything is just more complicated although it's a bit easier as they're getting older. I'm normally ok once we drive away though, but I'm always glad to be home afterwards.

It makes me feel a bit more normal that it’s not just me!

You're certainly not on your own OP. I get very anxious before any trips. My mum did as well. She was always convinced that everything would go wrong. I think that because that was how I was bought up I expect the same.
I try to combat these thoughts by taking plenty of time to get ready and check all my arrangements. I make sure no one disturbs me when I'm packing so my train of thought isn't interrupted. I print out tickets in good time and share emails about arrangements with DH or DC so if I lose them( one of my main fears) I have back ups. I also fine it helpful to think about alternatives to my plans . I wish you all the best and hope you enjoy your break.

Thank you everyone 😄. My biggest worry seems to be that we get struck with the lurgy the day before we are due to go! And I hate leaving the pets 🙈.

This really is one of the things I will forever be grateful to not have in my life since my husband left.

His stress coming up to holidays/events really spoiled it for everyone else around him. The catastrophising is horrific to be around, and the determination to drag everyone else into it is so so wearing.

The whole “enjoying when he gets there” is such a slap in the face. It is obviously deliberately done to start enjoying the holiday once it has been spoiled for everyone else.

To be honest, I don’t know why people who can hardly cope with travel bother going on holiday. Why inflict yourself on others like that. I know they don’t mean to ruin it for others but they always still do.

Me!!!

I hate spending money on holidays because I get so anxious about all the things that could go wrong and therefore the money would be wasted if no one has a nice time. I stress about the pets/house and what if the (booked and paid for) house sitter let’s us down at the last minute.

We’re going away in 2 weeks… a trip my husband has wanted to do for about 10 years… but it was quite expensive. I used my savings to buy the trip as a gift, as it was a ‘big’ birthday. I’m starting to get the panicky feelings already.

Yes! I usually book last minute for this reason. It also pretty much solves the "what if it rains the whole time?" issue. Would that be an option? I realise it isn't for everyone. I usually book my annual leave then decide where to go at the last minute. I'll have 3-4 options and pick from those.

I always feel like I'm responsible for gathering all the threads together and worry I'll miss something.
The rest of the family laughs at me, but invariably it is the case that it's lucky I picked up the slack.
I'm OK when actually away though but the return also stresses me ( what if we miss the transfer? Leave something important at the apartment? Etc)

I’ve found this more so as I’ve gotten older - even though DC are now older also (teens and a pre-teen) and we did lots of hols when they were smaller. They used to be a breeze. Now I am catastropising more before we go. Will the flight be on time and the car hire still be open, will the car hire have a car, will the accommodation tell us they don’t have our booking etc etc .

I think it’s that as we travel more and also get a bit older I realise what could actually go wrong with internet booked stuff or just stuff in general 😬. I’m finding it very stressful and I bloody love holidays!!!

God yes.

I’m totally fine on my own, but I’m a planner and DH is more ‘if I have a passport and a phone, everything will be OK’. So we wind each other up no end.

I'm old and cynical now, but I'd be more concerned about him leaving you or being a twat, and now you've wasted all of your savings on him. (Been there!)
Hopefully I'm just bitter and you have an amazing holiday!

@WhatTheFuk i hope not!! Now you’ve given me something else to worry about! 🤣

No one ever knows what’s round the corner, but, as far as I’m aware, 21 years together and I don’t think he’s about to jump ship!

I recognize what someone said about parent behaviour - I definitely get it from my parents. And yes I do worry about what pp says and spoiling it for the rest of the family. On the other hand I'm always the one to organize everything - not the actual trip but the logistics. So it's me running round like a headless chicken packing for the kids, sorting pet care, cleaning house ready for pet sitter etc. if there was a leak it would be me calling plumber, cleaning up mess etc. It is getting easier now they can occupy themselves while I pack etc. I also know my husband will get grumpy if anything goes wrong so i feel that as a pressure. But yes I wish I could be more relaxed about it all!

I am exactly the same. I battle through to the night before and then I calm down!!

Me! Spent over a year planning a special trip to Mexico. We're going next week an now I'm really worried.

I do where travel arrangements include flying or ferries and don't relax until I'm where I need to be.
Also packing for long trips can sometimes result in sleepless nights worrying about what clothes to pack.

Just reading this thread has made me feel anxious!
On the morning of the day when we're going away I'm quite often retching with nerves.

me too. And the first night away I lie in bed and think.about how many nights it is until I am home again. But after that first night I enjoy it and I am fine.
I often wonder if it is worth it all !

Yes, a friend of mine was (and probably still is) exactly like this. His idea of a good time was a weekend without leaving the sofa, and even mild deviations from routine that required him to do something outside the house (taking his kids to a swimming lesson) alarmed and stressed him, so as you can imagine he was unbearable in the run up to holidays — flapping, catastrophising, turning packing into some kind of exercise in military-style preparedness.

His wife always did the planning, booking etc. And then he asked for a divorce on day two of their family holiday in 2019. Now she takes their children on holidays and he doesn’t ever leave the house with them.

I wouldn't exactly say I get stressed, I was lucky enough to do a fair amount of travelling when young, but now I am more at a point where I can't be bothered with the effort.