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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Message from childminder

165 replies

discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:16

Aibu to think this is shit.

''Due to a change of circumstances I am no longer going to be working Friday pm. This unfortunately means that I need to give notice. Therefore My last day with xx will be 5th January.

Thank you''

So for context my child started with childminder 3 weeks ago, one afternoon a week, all seems to be going well, he's reluctant to go in but I get updates pretty quickly to say he's settled fine. CM newly registered and doesn't seem particularly busy.

AIBU to be fed up with this?

OP posts:
Original poster
discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:36

From what I can see she only has my son that day and her own daughter so I just don't know. Obviously I'll have to accept it.

OP posts:
Crazycrazylady · 24/11/2023 19:36

Gosh you're in for a long hard road if you think this is shit!

Denimdenimdenim · 24/11/2023 19:37

These things happen, OP. Inconvenient for you but I would say 6 weeks is enough time to find new arrangements

Jk987 · 24/11/2023 19:39

If you're only doing one afternoon a week, it's not much income for them and sounds like it's not worth it. I think all childminders should take Friday afternoons off. They work such long hours, it's deserved!

Original poster
discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:41

I pay £18.38 a week so I suppose that's her only income that afternoon. Not worth her working maybe?

OP posts:
Knittedfairies · 24/11/2023 19:51

@discombobulaty -how many hours does she have your daughter?

MondayBags678 · 24/11/2023 19:52

Yabu
most places would not allow one afternoon a week to start with due to settling in purposes.
and no she is not being unreasonable, she has given more notice than others would and she doesn’t sound unreliable at all.
unreliable is letting you down on the day or v little notice , but she’s giving you plenty as other people have said and worded it well.
if she only has your dc and her own that day , then maybe her own is wanting her attention and she’s finding it hard with both and wants a day for them to spend time together, it could be many different reasons but it’s irrelevant , she’s entitled to change her hours and days of work to suit her life. And this doesn’t make her unreasonable or unreliable.

Original poster
discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:53

@Knittedfairies 3.5 hours I pay for but I usually drop her late so 3 hours.

OP posts:
Original poster
discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:59

I mean I drop my son off with her late not the CM. Anyway nothing I can do and I appreciate all the comments. Thinking it might be best to stop sending him now as he's going to have to settle somewhere else now.

OP posts:
Pip47 · 24/11/2023 20:00

TBH you’ve got to kind of get used to this with childminders, they’re generally fab and I couldn’t have had a career without them but very common for them to change their availability as essentially most of them do childminding as it’s work they can fits in within whatever suits their family/life best. I often find new ones are initially very flexible and then hone down to what better suits them realistically once they realise not so difficult to get business

Binglebongledingledangle · 24/11/2023 20:00

You're not somewhere beginning with C are you? Similar thing happened to me.

quizmasterr · 24/11/2023 20:02

I agree with PPs that it is not shit and does my make her unreliable

Just this past week someone in my circle was saying they're moving their child from the CM to nursery and felt bad but it worked better for them and most people said yes do what's best for you and don't feel bad.
Only a few days later someone said they were annoyed their CM could no longer do a certain day and everyone agreed it was rubbish.

Surely being able to give notice goes both ways?

The CM's circumstances may have changed and she's entitled to give notice or should she just keep working Fridays until you decide you no longer need her?

PippyLongTits · 24/11/2023 20:05

Why are you fed up with this? Apart from continue to make arrangements for a day that she is no longer available, what would you want her to do differently? She has given you updates when your child is in her care, she has given you plenty of notice to make new arrangements and she has been polite and professional in her message. What else should she have done?

anon2134 · 24/11/2023 20:05

She gave you 6 weeks notice. How is that unreliable?

ThickSkinnedSoWhat · 24/11/2023 20:09

discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:41

I pay £18.38 a week so I suppose that's her only income that afternoon. Not worth her working maybe?

Would you work for £18.38 for an afternoon? I certainly wouldn't! If you think this is tough, you are really in for quite a wake up call. Especially if you're looking for a childminder for one three hour period a week.

GirrlCrush · 24/11/2023 20:10

She's not paid enough!!

Gro · 24/11/2023 20:13

She's not making minimum wage. If she had 2 or 3 children in then maybe it would be worth it but not for 1.

Whattodonexts · 24/11/2023 20:14

One afternoon a week is not enough for your little one to settle, most places usually insist on at least 1 full day or 2 sessions a week for little ones so they settle better.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 24/11/2023 20:15

I don’t think she’s doing anything wrong. Unfortunately circumstances change.

Shes given plenty of notice, and it’s a polite message so I think all fine.

Annoying to have to find someone new but these things happen.

PinkArt · 24/11/2023 20:15

quizmasterr · 24/11/2023 20:02

I agree with PPs that it is not shit and does my make her unreliable

Just this past week someone in my circle was saying they're moving their child from the CM to nursery and felt bad but it worked better for them and most people said yes do what's best for you and don't feel bad.
Only a few days later someone said they were annoyed their CM could no longer do a certain day and everyone agreed it was rubbish.

Surely being able to give notice goes both ways?

The CM's circumstances may have changed and she's entitled to give notice or should she just keep working Fridays until you decide you no longer need her?

It's people consciously or unconsciously looking down on 'the help'. Similar attitudes here on threads about cleaners, supermarket staff and teachers.

Thegoodbadandugly · 24/11/2023 20:15

It's not unreliable you haven't a clue why she has had to cancel, for all you know she could have a terminally ill parent or could be ill herself.

StarlightLime · 24/11/2023 20:19

discombobulaty · 24/11/2023 19:41

I pay £18.38 a week so I suppose that's her only income that afternoon. Not worth her working maybe?

For three hours?! Of course it's not worth the bother!

KrisAkabusi · 24/11/2023 20:20

Hang on! You're only paying her £18.38 for three and a half hours work?! That is ridiculously cheap. Good luck finding anyone else at that rate.

ThisIsntThe80sPat · 24/11/2023 20:21

I wouldn't look after someone else's child for 6 pound an hour either...

Lizzieregina · 24/11/2023 20:25

If yours is the only paying child she has, I’m sure she has decided it’s not worth committing her Fridays. She’d probably need at least one more to make it worthwhile, and even then it’s not much.