To think it's selfish to eat from special dietary requirements when you have none?

[IndividualMini]

At a work conference, where a catered lunch is being offered. There are specific sections for dietary requirements with limited supplies eg vegan, gluten free, nut free, along with a larger section for ordinary non-vegetarian sandwiches with ordinary bread. The guy ahead of me takes something from every single section including the ordinary non-vegetarian section, so clearly is not a vegan with gluten allergies! Why do people do this? As someone with specific dietary requirements I've been left many times with very little to eat because others have eaten food without thinking about whether others might actually need it.

I organised a buffet for close family and friends. The only thing I could eat was marked dairy free and there wasn’t much - enough for one person.

@Bringonthesunforthewashing so you were the only person who needed the dairy free, and there was only enough of that food for one person …. but you put it out on the buffet? 🤣

I think your own tactics (or lack of them) played a huge part in your hunger that day!

I think if food is clearly set out in a separate section as gluten free or nut or dairy free, then it's rude and inconsiderate to take it if you don't have those requirements.

Vegetarian/vegan options at a buffet is different, because meat-eating humans are not obligate carnivores and typically do eat things that don't contain meat products. A good buffet would have enough of those items for everyone.

I had this before at a BBQ. There were two veggie burgers for me (the only veggie). Was offered another burger by the hosts (the second burger) and no one could find it. Turns out a non-veggie guest had just helped himself to it, he didn’t apologise or anything just said “oh yeah I’ve never had a veggie burger before so thought I’d give it a go.” Completely oblivious to the fact that there was no other food for me to eat. Some people are just selfish.

With the veggie burgers surely the host needs to provide more? Lots of people are reducing meat eating now so it’s not that unlikely that someone will eat a veggie burger over beef? I would think it would be good to encourage it? Not sure how many people now eat red meat it’s falling out of favour

Yes, and infuriating if they only took a bite out of it, but the fault is with there not being enough of the veggie food.

From my experience, omnivores holding a BBQ will get the meat and accompaniments, then add some vegeburgers, like 1 pack because there will be a handful of vegetarians. The vegeburgers won't be very filling so even if the omnivores don't eat them there still won't be enough.

People who entertain a lot tend to get plenty and have several side dishes that everyone can eat.

If they aren't for everyone, they shouldn't be accessible to everyone. If people are presented with a range of food they're told they can help themselves to, of course they're going to help themselves!
I wouldn't choose a GF sandwich over a standard one when the filling is the same, but I'm also not going to eat a ham one I don't like over an egg one if they are all presented alongside each other.

If there was a sign on the plate or something saying they were specially ordered for people with certain requirements then yanbu, but if they were presented just as an option for all then it isn't the attendees at fault.

Surely that's on you for putting it out with the buffet rather than plating it up for yourself first?

Totally. It's weirdly deliberate martyrdom to make only one portion of the food you can eat and then put it out on a general buffet rather that keeping it aside. If I had strict dietary needs and was in charge of a buffet I would make sure at least 50% of the food was stuff I could eat, then everyone coukd have some and I would still be confident of a plate full.

What is annoying is 28 years ago when I became a veggie, no one would go near ' veggie food' and I just got a load if insults a out my dietary preference, now I have to be quick off the mark when I go to a wedding or christening buffet if I want something to eat!!🤣🤣

You said "limitless"

Everyone crack on

I am not a vegetarian but I mourn the replacement of vegetarian food on menus with vegan food, where 'vegan' is typically 'plant based burgers' and the like - I miss things like bean burgers.

Obviously I am not saying there should be no vegan options on the menu but whereas I enjoy vegetarian options for a change, I really dislike meat substitutes which seem to be the default non-meat choices these days.

There's government advice being churned out to reduce meat consumption for health/sustainability reasons, but if the alternative is a 'plant based' burger, I shall be sticking to (responsibly farmed) rare fillet steak.

At a family event or dinner for friends, I would try to make sure that as far as possible things were suitable for everyone, rather than just making specific amounts for individuals. But at a catered event where they have planned according to the numbers given, it is plain rude to take food intended for others, leaving them hungry.

I agree @CesareBorgia - I am an ex-vegetarian, I was fully veggie for about 30 years. I'm now basically an omnivore though with some restrictions on the kinds of meat I'll eat, and will often choose veggie when out if I don't know the ethical policy of the caterer.

There are loads of really delicious vegetarian recipes that use eggs and dairy and other veggie-but-not-vegan things and it's distressing how these have vanished from menus of most places in favour of plant-based recipes that are comparatively joyless and much less pleasant. The fully plant-based options can either achieve complexity of flavour and texture by being highly processed with strange and unpronouncable ingredients that artificially reproduce textures that would otherwise have come from animal products, or if they avoid that trap by sticking to simple every-day ingredients they just don't achieve much depth of flavour and are just a bit meh. Obviously it's great that vegans have a lot more options now but I wish it was easier to get a veggie dish prepared with actual cheese rather than some much less palatable soya-based-cheese-substitute.

I bet it was just greed. Faced with all that food he became greedy and grabbed food not even recognising it was labelled differently.

Last weekend me and a couple of other parents were running the cafe at our dds' volleyball tournament. The cakes we were selling were normal mocha brownie type cakes (normally the most popular choice) and gluten free Swiss roll. The Swiss roll sold out really quickly (so quickly I had to buy the last slice and hide it in the fridge for my coeliac dd to have after her games finished) while the brownies did not.
It was really good Swiss roll.

I wouldn't like a plate of gf food set aside for me at a buffet - I want to choose what I eat! The best way is to allow those with allergies and intolerances first pick at the buffet.

@SerenChocolateMuncher , because some people are quite ignorant when it comes to food.
A friend used to buy a certain grocery item because they were gluten-free, arguing that they were better quality and better for you. They had no idea what gluten was. They thought more expensive meant it was better.

Same friend used to describe any grease in food as lard. They didn't know what lard really was or that it was pig fat.

This kind of shows why it’s really not about the people choosing. I mean who would announce the buffet it open to those who have an intolerance or allergy, 😂

It happened after I was first diagnosed and trust me I learnt to be more explicit going forward! But to be honest he was so quick to munch into it I obviously didn’t want it after that.

Surely that would make it more of an issue for those who had allergies as it would increase the risk of contamination?

Won't be much risk of cross contamination if they're up first to pick. People with allergies are much more careful about cross contamination so won't use the wrong utensils etc.

YANBU and it's also a total nightmare for those organising the events. Recently for a conference of 200 people we had 4 who required gluten free. There were definitely not only 4 eating the few GF biscuits that had been provided and clearly labelled for them! More than enough non GF for everyone else. The organisation I (and all the attendees) work for do not have a budget for over ordering, we can only buy in what we need, and they'd all have known this. It's quite selfish really.

Where I work the GF, nut free and dairy free sandwiches are packaged individually and put at the end of the buffet table with the fruit. So if people have their plates piled high with sandwiches and head down to take a wrapped sandwich, the person policing the buffet will always ask if they need a special diet sandwich. It’s hard to say yes when you have a plate full of food already, so most people are shamed into leaving it alone.

Obviously gluten free and food for people with allergies should be separate but a lot of the issue at events is that not enough veggie food is provided. Most people are omnivores, veggie food is often healthier and lots of meat eaters I know don't eat meat every day. Making a buffet mainly veggie/ vegan with a small amount of meat makes much more sense and probably cheaper too

If not already labelled, I would label all