Is sexual assault more prevalent now

[Ceci03]

So my dd went off to uni at the end of sept. She's had quite a few instances of boys not wanting to hear "no I'm not interested" . In the second week she had to hide in the local shop as a boy was following her after meeting her the night before. Another sag a boy followed her back to her dorm after an event as he wanted to know where she lived. She'd already told him she want interested. She ended up knocking on a strange door and asking the students could she come in for a minute and wait til he was gone as she didn't want him to know where she lived. Other instances similar to this on nights out. And then on Tues night she was out with 2 girls at a club and somehow got slightly separated from them and a guy came onto her and she said no not interested but he was very persistent and ended up assaulting her. She called it "groping" but it sounded like an assault to me. She told him to fuck off and he said "what do you expect when you're dressed like that". I mean what century are we in. I thought it would
Be better for dds generation but honestly it seems worse than ever. How can we get through to our sons that this is totally unacceptable. I want to know what happened to romance and charm anyway. Do they really thing behaving like that is going to make a girl like them???? She is totally switched off all men and boys now. It's sad that girls can't go out and have fun without all these creeps. Anyone else noticed it?

I don’t think it is worse, I just think it is taken seriously now. I recognise her experience and if I mentioned it to anyone except close, like-minded friends, I was told I should be lucky to be getting the attention. Very disheartened to hear that nothing has changed in 20 years though. Your poor DD.

I think YABU in that it's not more prevalent but people are less tolerant of it and more aware of it. Literally everyone I've ever spoken to about it (male or female) has suffered a sexual assault of some kind such as being groped by a stranger. In the past, even the recent past, victims were more likely to keep quiet about it. It's interesting how things are different now, there was no way I would have mentioned the sexual assault I suffered when I was 16 to my parents. I don't think I told anyone about it until I was 40. That's what's changed, people are more willing to discuss it and their is less shame in being a victim.

I was a teen in the 1970s, and innuendo, groping, inappropriate touching and other forms of sexual assault were common. But as already said, it wasn’t taken seriously. Being the focus of male attention, welcome or not, was seen as to be expected if you were female.
It’s how I gained the nickname Squib, because I didn’t put up with it.

This was all happening when I was a student (20+ years ago). Very depressing to hear that it is still happening now.

As a mother of sons I would like to think that my boys would never behave that way, but then I expect that the mothers of the boys you mention above also feel that way.

So I don't know what the answer is except for continuing to say no and telling people when they are crossing a line or making you feel uncomfortable.

I think that watching "I may destroy you" should be mandatory for all teenagers to help educate about issues of consent.

I couldn't imagine my son thinking this kind of behavior is ok. But like you say probably the mums of those creeps would say they couldn't imagine it either. Yet again it's up to the girls to tell them. When are they going to get the message. The guy that did that to her in the club on Tuesday probably hasn't given it a second thought. Obviously and lot of boys just see nothing wrong with behaving like this

More men need to call out their friends when they see this sort of thing going on. Men aren't hearing it when women tell them they don't like it. Maybe they would hear it better from other men.

Most women know of at least one friend who has been harassed/assaulted/raped, but most men would say that they don't know any men who are harassers/assaulters/rapists, so there is obviously a huge disconnect in what men and women think qualify as harassment/assault/rape.

When I was a teen in the this type of behaviour was common, I don't think it has changed at all. I do think girls are less tolerant of it now though, which is a good thing.

It's really hard to know if things are better or worse. I work in this area on legal side (but not currently in the UK), and an uncle and two cousins worked for decades in LMP, and indeed we do sometimes end up talking about work in general.

The numbers for England and Wales and published on a yearly basis, if you google you'll find them. Indeed for 2022 that show a record high. If you stand back and think about 70K+ rapes reported in the 2022 it just incredible to think the damage being done, then also consider the number not reported to police (it's commonly to double that baseline number as an estimate). Digging into the data more you'll see that, as expected since it is the date of report logged, the 2022 reports also include historical reports on the previous year(s), but that averages out over time.

Is it better or worse? Is it more people reporting? I've really have no idea. I personally know people who were assaulted, back in the 80s and did not report. It was something not spoken about much then. In my network of friends it is something spoken about and shared openly today (as with other life experiences), but that was not the case 30 years ago.

No, for most people, it's better. Sexual harassment was rife, in the workplace, and other places, years ago.

There was no one to complain to years ago.

I don't think so.

We are just more aware of it and we are more prepared to call things out that we would have tolerated in the past.

I don't recognise the stalkerish behaviour (I'm in my 50s so at uni in the late 80s/early 90s) but the being assaulted in clubs by guys you'd turned down was common.

Im 51 and lost count of men who have been like this with me over 34 years...they still do it!!! Yes from when i was very young teenager. I cant say if i think its better, i work at Womens Aid and every client has been abused by men

According to the Crime Survey for England and Wales, sexual assault fluctuates between 1.5% and 3% (percentage of 16 - 59 year olds who experience sexual assault). It was at a low in 2014 but has doubled in the years since.

So while it might not be unusually bad historically, it's at the upper end after being significantly lower recently.