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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel a bit pissed off at the Nursery?

30 replies

HydrateYourself01 · 20/11/2023 12:30

Firstly to say, the nursery is AMAZING. Staff so kind, so caring and DD has settled really well there. No complaints otherwise.

DD, for the second time has been sent home with a temperature (they're a no calpol nursery, don't think we realised the full implications of this when we registered her there!)

The last time was a couple of weeks ago, thought it was a bit odd as I dropped her off at 8.30 all fine and at 10am got a call to go and get her as she had a temp of 38 for more than 10 minutes. She's teething bad and has been for a while so I suspected teeth. Left work and got there to pick her up for her to be happy, giggling. Got her home, took it again and it had gone down to 37.8, took it again 20 min later, 37.3. That was the end of that.

It's just happened again. Went to get her and she was screaming on her keyworker's lap, but annoyingly, they hadn't given her her dummy (it really helps with teething pain and just soothing her and getting her to stop crying in general) They know she uses the dummy as a comforter if she's upset so no idea why they hadn't given it to her as I think she'd been crying for a while at that point.

I think it's teething yet again as she was dribbling when I went to pick her up. Got her home, happy as larry, temp after 10 mins being at home was 37.6.

I'm now yet again going to have to try and get work done, with a perfectly well toddler running around when she could just be in nursery.

I want to ring and say to the manager that she's a hot baby in general (she is) and that she's teething atm so she might be a bit grizzly and if that's the case, please give her the dummy otherwise she'll work herself up so much that she'll get hot, get a temp and then we'll have to go and get her.

I know I probably ABU, but it just feels like such a waste, having her here when there's nothing wrong with her and she could be in nursery. She's had so much time off lately for genuine illness which doesn't help either.

OP posts:
underneaththeash · 20/11/2023 12:34

Next time, just go in with your own thermometer.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 20/11/2023 12:35

Definitely say something. Did they say what temp she was today? Whatever about the temperature, they absolutely should have given her the soother for comfort when she was upset, whatever the cause of the upset.

Just be honest, talk to the room leader or manager and tell them what you said here. You are definitely not unreasonable to query it.

Coyoacan · 20/11/2023 12:36

That's odd. I always thought a healthy temperature was 36.5

Childcare47 · 20/11/2023 12:39

Ask why they are taking her temperature.

I have a friend whose baby seemingly goes home once a week with a temperature, and it turns out they have a policy of testing all children every two hours (!).

Dramatic · 20/11/2023 12:40

I mean she could be a generally hot child but 38 is definitely a high temperature and wouldn't just be caused by crying for a while. I doubt they'll change their policy on it.

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/11/2023 12:47

You don't spike a fever with teething. Anything over 37.8 (used to be 37.5) is a fever.
Your child is brewing something, probably a virus that they have picked up at nursery.
This is then going to get passed around to other children at nursery.... and the cycle continues.

I wouldn't be happy with a nursery that keeps children topped up with paracetamol to keep fevers down.

Hotpinkangel19 · 20/11/2023 12:50

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/11/2023 12:47

You don't spike a fever with teething. Anything over 37.8 (used to be 37.5) is a fever.
Your child is brewing something, probably a virus that they have picked up at nursery.
This is then going to get passed around to other children at nursery.... and the cycle continues.

I wouldn't be happy with a nursery that keeps children topped up with paracetamol to keep fevers down.

This. The amount of parents who give calpol for the slightest thing, then send them into nursery and school and hope for the best, when their child is clearly ill and needs to be home is annoying.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 20/11/2023 12:55

Nurseries are normally boiling hot too - I had mine sent home many moons ago when a toddler with a supposed temperature of 39. Really panicked as she was my first and took her to the GP - made the appointment in the way so took her straight there, just 10 mins from nursery. Temperature was then something like 37 as she’d been out of the hotter than the sun nursery room. What a waste of time!

Also there were GPs too see in those days as the Tories hadn’t properly got their claws in yet - was in about 2010 at a guess.

Original poster
HydrateYourself01 · 20/11/2023 13:06

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/11/2023 12:47

You don't spike a fever with teething. Anything over 37.8 (used to be 37.5) is a fever.
Your child is brewing something, probably a virus that they have picked up at nursery.
This is then going to get passed around to other children at nursery.... and the cycle continues.

I wouldn't be happy with a nursery that keeps children topped up with paracetamol to keep fevers down.

No, I totally agree.

There’s been many times when she’s been ill/ just not herself and we’ve kept her off. I would never send an ill child to nursery, breaks my heart the thought of them sitting there ill.

Don’t get me wrong, the nursery isn’t at fault, as in they were just dealing with the info that they had in front of them, it’s more that yet again, I don’t think she’s ill as she’s running about here fine and her temp has lowered still to 37 in one ear and 36.7 in the other.

It’s that I think it was just a mixture of it being really hot in the room that she’s in and teething, which is what it must’ve been the other week too as she never did come down I’ll with anything then. I’m worrying that this could happen every week, multiple times a week even.

OP posts:
Amaura · 20/11/2023 13:08

Both me and my DD have a base temperature of 37.6 and if we’re a bit tired (or ovulating) will tip into being 38 quite easily. We’re only unwell if we get to 38.3. DH and DS run a whole degree colder, so 38 on DS does correlate to him being unwell.

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/11/2023 13:13

I'm in the mix of with with my daughter starting school. New bug every week. It's just something we're having to deal with. The time of year, children practically coughing in each others faces etc!
You don't spike a fever because of a warm room. It would have to be extreme heat. It does elevate your body temperature but not to spike a fever.

You seem convinced it's teething....but the time of year it is, the amounts of snots, coughs etc going it sounds like a virus.

Fupoffyagrasshole · 20/11/2023 13:16

my nursery give calpol but you need to collect once they do

Original poster
HydrateYourself01 · 20/11/2023 13:19

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/11/2023 13:13

I'm in the mix of with with my daughter starting school. New bug every week. It's just something we're having to deal with. The time of year, children practically coughing in each others faces etc!
You don't spike a fever because of a warm room. It would have to be extreme heat. It does elevate your body temperature but not to spike a fever.

You seem convinced it's teething....but the time of year it is, the amounts of snots, coughs etc going it sounds like a virus.

I only think teething because her temp is now normal and she’s seemingly fine. I would assume she’d have just stayed ill with a temp. It could definitely spike again later obviously but just seems odd that once we’d got her home and she’d calmed down she was fine, temperature and all.

OP posts:
storypushers · 20/11/2023 13:21

Coyoacan · 20/11/2023 12:36

That's odd. I always thought a healthy temperature was 36.5

What's odd?

starfishmummy · 20/11/2023 13:45

Coyoacan · 20/11/2023 12:36

That's odd. I always thought a healthy temperature was 36.5

For some people it is.

The "average" range is 36-37. But the best thing is to know what your/your dc's baseline temperature is - measured when they are well.

Givemeahigh · 20/11/2023 14:01

My DD got a temperature every single time she was cutting a tooth. I took her to the GP and they said its very normal. We had a similar situation with nursery and I don't miss it for a second. We did speak to them as you've suggested and it definitely helped.

tealweasel · 20/11/2023 14:03

It's so frustrating isn't it OP? We had this for the first 6 or 7 months when my son started nursery - I'd get a call to say he had a temperature, which would be gone within 15 minutes of leaving the building. Happened at least 2 or 3 times a month for that period. One day I had a bit of a meltdown in the foyer (boss was angry at me for the number of times I was having to step out and I was worried I was going to get fired) - don't know if it was a coincidence or not but the frequent calls to collect stopped after that and we've maybe only had 2 or 3 total in the year since then.

gemloving · 20/11/2023 14:08

It's very frustrating OP but sadly nothing can be done.

BusMumsHoliday · 20/11/2023 14:14

Would they agree to taking her temperature again 30 minutes later to see if there is an improvement? My nursery will do this if we can collect very soon afterwards. Obviously won't work if she's screaming.

threefiftysix · 20/11/2023 14:18

Are they using an ear thermometer? If so only 38 and above is a fever I think?

threefiftysix · 20/11/2023 14:20

www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/health/how-to-take-your-babys-temperature/

Can you show them this?

witmum · 20/11/2023 14:27

We had the same when my done was teething. The most silly one was a they put him in a jumper in a boiling hot room.

Anything over 37 is a temp at our nursery.

jannier · 20/11/2023 14:30

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 20/11/2023 12:55

Nurseries are normally boiling hot too - I had mine sent home many moons ago when a toddler with a supposed temperature of 39. Really panicked as she was my first and took her to the GP - made the appointment in the way so took her straight there, just 10 mins from nursery. Temperature was then something like 37 as she’d been out of the hotter than the sun nursery room. What a waste of time!

Also there were GPs too see in those days as the Tories hadn’t properly got their claws in yet - was in about 2010 at a guess.

Going outside on a cool day helps bring a temp down so it would be lower. It doesn't mean it wasn't high.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 20/11/2023 15:03

jannier · 20/11/2023 14:30

Going outside on a cool day helps bring a temp down so it would be lower. It doesn't mean it wasn't high.

Show quote history

Fair enough but I’m just thinking it doesn’t help!

It seems to be just so that the nursery uniform can be t shirts as I’ve never seen any other explanation for the boiling rooms.

Anyway mine are way beyond nursery age now

Demonsandcupcakes · 20/11/2023 15:12

the problem with a temperature is you never know what’s caused it nor how long it will last. I’ve sent home children with a temperature and they’ve been fine an hour later. Other times the temperature has continued to rise. It’s one of the reasons I will take the child’s temperature with the parent present on collection.

the nursery staff aren’t doctors and need to follow the rules of the setting. I will give calpol but will only do this whilst parents are on their way to collect to hopefully prevent the temperature rising further. I don’t think the other parents would be very happy if the nursery knowingly allowed a child with a fever to stay and then passed a big around the setting.

sadly, children can decline rapidly and before you know it you have a very poorly child.