Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you ever use a stern voice with your kids ( especially in public ) ?

37 replies

shoutylouty · 19/11/2023 20:42

My DD is 4 in Jan. Sometimes when we are out and about she likes to mess around a bit and runs off a bit. I am very very very vigilant and she's never actually run off and got lost, but I do tell her off when she does it.

Not hugely shouty, but stern voice kind of thing

I never see anyone else doing this with their kids in public.

I somehow feel it's always my kids having tantrums and running off. I have seen some tantrums from kids but I haven't seen parents having a stern words with kids like I have had to do in public, a number of times.

My DD's tantrums have got a lot better and she's able to accept when she can't get her way much better. The only issue is that she gets silly and wants to be chased sometimes ( I don't chase her ). She also sometimes doesn't want to hold my hand and wants to walk by herself next to me. Everything at the moment is ' no I want to do it myself, on my own ' etc.

Anyway, is it just my impression that kids never seem to be getting told off in public or is it that all kids are so well behaved that there's no need to tell tell them off OR do parents no longer tell kids off ( especially in public ). ? When I've used stern voice ( not shouting ) I have got looks.

OP posts:
AuntMarch · 19/11/2023 20:44

Absolutely I do, if his behaviour could be dangerous or bothering other people and he ignores me asking him normally.

OnWhatGrounds · 19/11/2023 20:46

Yep regularly

MonkeyPuddle · 19/11/2023 20:46

Yep. I do the quiet and calm but very serious voice that DC knows mummy means business.

Winnipeggy · 19/11/2023 20:46

Yes, not shouting but just a voice stern enough that she knows what I'm saying is serious, mostly just for her own safety.

HippeePrincess · 19/11/2023 20:47

I did when little, don’t ever need to now as I only need to give mine a certain look.

NoItsStillNighttimeDarling · 19/11/2023 20:47

Good god yes

Fairtobefairohhhhhc · 19/11/2023 20:48

Oh yes. In a couple of years you can upgrade it to 'the look'

Coffeeandchristmascake · 19/11/2023 20:48

I think most parents recognise the feeling that it's only ever their kids that misbehave when out and about! ( It's not). And yes I absolutely pull mine up wherever we are, whether their friends are there or not, and it does embarrass them sometimes ( but then they shouldn't be playing up so 🤷‍♀️)

WhiskySour83 · 19/11/2023 20:48

Thank you for this post. I feel exactly the same! My older son is very 'spirited' and often provokes a stern voice in public...

GaggleTheGoose · 19/11/2023 20:50

Yes.
I used to have them on reins too, so any shenanigans saw them being picked up and carried like a bag of shopping.

Original poster
shoutylouty · 19/11/2023 20:50

Maybe I don't notice other kids misbehaving because I'm so focused on us I guess. Or the parents are better at not seeming flustered about it.

OP posts:
SoSad44 · 19/11/2023 20:51

I definitely do.

SusanSHelit · 19/11/2023 20:52

Mine quite often got 'the voice' when was younger. He's 10 now and gets 'full name the look'

It generally doesn't take much more than that to bring him back in line

He's still a lot better behaved if he goes outside every day, but then I'm generally better company if I get some time outside too so I don't really expect that to ever change

Vallmo47 · 19/11/2023 20:53

If I was around your child misbehaving in public and you were doing something to resolve the situation the only look you’d be receiving from me would be one of praise OP. Too many parents look the other way and it’s beyond annoying. I much prefer what you’re doing to the opposite! Well done.

Legoblockskillfeet · 19/11/2023 20:54

I am forever telling mine off in public. I occasionally fell other people's off too.

My mother never shouted in public, she would whisper when really cross and we knew that she meant business as soon as her voice dropped.

RM2013 · 19/11/2023 20:54

I did yes. Not shouting as such. It definitely firm voice and sometimes just the look would do the trick!!

Pooooochi · 19/11/2023 20:54

Ha all the time! With the younger one especially. Eldest has learned now that i won't put up with shit & doesn't try.

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 19/11/2023 20:56

My 'teacher voice' has often reared its head, let's leave it at that!

AhBiscuits · 19/11/2023 20:56

Yes absolutely, these need to be dealt with there and then.

Sapphire387 · 19/11/2023 20:56

Yeah I think that's because there's loads of people who don't really discipline their kids anymore. I use the voice, and the look.

My favourite one recently was when two of mine started bickering on the train, so I put on the voice and said stop it now, everyone in this carriage doesn't want to listen to you two arguing. And a lady piped up and said thank you, no we don't!

Stopped them in their tracks 😁

Kerantli · 19/11/2023 20:57

Yep.
My kids are now teens but if they start up they get a stern voiced Full Name and The Look. Though did once have to have a quiet but stern conversation with my eldest over his attitude in one outing. Attitude improved and the death stare I got from him just made me inwardly laugh

DramaAlpaca · 19/11/2023 20:58

Well mine are grown now so no need, but I certainly did when necessary when they were children. I was never a shouty mum but perfected the stern voice in public quite early on. Even now 'the look' can stop my three 20-something sons in their tracks and the blokes I manage at work on occasion too Grin

sakura06 · 19/11/2023 20:59

Absolutely. I'm a teacher 😂

GettingStuffed · 19/11/2023 20:59

I do this to my grandson, especially when he runs out into the road. I'm pretty sure he's stopped doing this

JC89 · 19/11/2023 20:59

Oh yes. Similar age to yours actually!

Swipe left for the next trending thread