Fed up of no effort with the kids other than for social media

[Ticklemeharder]

First in the family to have kids. We have DS (two years) and DD (six months). Certain relatives will tell everybody in the near vicinity how much they adore being aunties/uncles and like to send photos to their wider family of the kids/post the occasional photo on social media.

Starting to find it particularly grating as they make zero effort with the kids outside of photo opportunities and I just find it really sad that they have no interest in getting to know them and just seem to want me to facilitate getting the DC to laugh or smile for photos with them so they can post it on social media and have everyone gush how lucky they are to have an auntie/uncle like them.

I’m noticing it more with my eldest now as he is nervous with people he doesn’t know very well and takes a little while to warm up but they seem to completely disregard his discomfort for the “gram”. We hadn’t seen them for a little while until today and i have just come away a little shocked.

Are you going to say something to them?

I get this sort of thing with my dad although not on social media.
Anytime we see him at big get togethers he’ll tell anyone who will listen all about how great it is being a grandad and how great the kids are (mine and my niece and nephew) yet he goes months and sometimes years without seeing them or sending so much as a text on their birthdays.
He is a twat though and fortunately my kids have enough other brilliant family who are very involved in their lives. I just ignore him mostly. He’s the saddo, mainly because the people that he’s telling actually know the truth 😂 Genuinely though, I do let it wash over me.

I did today. I told them my DS wasn’t comfortable with being picked up and made to sit with them to pose for a photo (we went out for a meal) and suggested while we waited for food they could take him outside to explore as they had a little play area. They didn’t want to do this (it was windy) which is fine but they also rejected walking over to the pub with us as they were hungover. I’m extra irritated with the fact they said he was “hard work”, and although he absolutely has his arsehole moments, he was beautifully behaved, he just started to get upset when they tried to move him from his sticker book for a photo