Signed off on stress. AIBU to no longer have any idea how to relax or what to do?

[Spideylady]

I am a single parent and have two DS who are autistic. I work full time. Today my GP signed me off on stress related problems.

I just don’t know what to do with myself. Stress has been a continual feature for so long. I have forgotten how to relax and have fun. I just don’t do things for myself.

What is a good plan to bring down the stress levels over the next two weeks?

I have some money but don’t want to spend a fortune. Called about a massage and they suggested £80 an hour!

I can see some things myself:

1. Stop obsessively reading about other parent SEN experiences as this is making me overwhelmed and prone to catastrophising.
2. Maybe go for walks?

Exercise! Get the endorphins going, whether that’s a run, a walk, a cycle etc. Get out in the fresh air every day, it helps me so much and I really notice it when I stop.

I hope you feel better soon.

Join a couple of local walking groups, especially ones who stop for tea and cake.

One child has school avoidance. Both children are just very dependent on me. Bedtimes take hours..

You might be able to find these on your local Facebook or next door pages.

For a few days, do nothing. Watch TV, Potter about. Reset. Then figure out what you'd like to do.

Exercise! Walks, swimming, cycling , whatever you fancy. That's the best way I know to clear my mind and it brings in the endorphins too

If it would help, you could declutter the house or do the Christmas prep so that you feel more in control.
Go to the library, get some good books, mooch around charity shops, visit a gallery or museum?

A mixture of strategic planning and actual relaxation.

Explore and list some strategies that will work when you are back in work so are manageable.

Find some apps or similar that prompt you to pause and breathe.

Promise list- Promise to prioritise your well-being; to take lunch away from your desk every day etc.

Create a little space you can go in quiet moments to light a candle, apply hand cream, little moments of self care.

Explore support for you- whether it’s a helpline, cleaner whatever.

Repetitive exercise, calms the mind, sorts the breathing.
Walking, swimming etc.
Yoga - where your mind can only think about the guided practice, so the other stuff switches off.
Coffee and cake after - with company

A long walk with an audiobook on. Focussing on something else like that is the only way I can switch off my brain. It's on warp speed 10 all the time, so I quietly short circuit if I dont get down time. It also lifts my depression .

Exercise can be a good distraction

Contact your local carer charity and sign up for wellbeing package / days . They are considerably cheaper than private 💓

reading, meditation, walking and contact with other adults.

I struggle with letting go of stress, anxiety and fear and these things help me a lot.

Gardening? If you have one, now is the perfect time for planting spring bulbs. Can do in a pot if no plantable space. Being outside helps me and it's a little project that us achievable and absorbing

I'd vote do nothing for a few days. Trying to figure out what to do is just going to stress you more. The thought that you need to be doing something may also be the stress!

Don't plan anything (around your responsibilities). Let yourself have a while to read, watch TV, etc. Then, if you feel like doing something, do it.

Take care of yourself!

1. Give yourself permission to act like you're physically ill for a few days, sleep, watch TV, zone out.

1. Go for walks in the woods or somewhere green, ideally with a friend. Get sun on your face as early as possible in the day

1. Do other things that make you feel good, bath, nails, book?

1. Take time to cook and eat nourishing and yummy food

1. Achieve something small each day to give you a sense of achievement. Cluttered drawer annoying you, empty the washing basket?

I like doing what I call a 'mindless job.' I recently started re-painting the internal doors- it's a job which requires enough concentration to do it properly but not enough to make my brain hurt. Yes, it's dull but I find a few hours have passed and my mind has actually had to focus rather than whizzing off to think about stuff I need to get done.