To fear the worst?

[Lewys156]

Hiya all, hope this thread is okay to post here. My grandson is 19 and has been with his girlfriend of the same age for about 4 months now; she is a very kind and pretty girl, and they're obviously happy together which is amazing. This weekend coming they are going away to Scotland, which we've known for a few weeks.

However, this morning our neighbour in her 80s (who my grandson is close to and supports as she suffers from early stage dementia) accidentally let slip to me that they're going to Gretna Green, which they hadn't told us and obviously rang alarm bells for all of us. I asked my grandson straight out about this, in case our neighbour had gotten confused; he admitted this is correct, but insists that they're only going for a week's holiday there and are not intending to elope. Despite this reassurance, I'm still thinking the worst due to the reputation of the place for 'runaway weddings'. Obviously they're both adults so can do what they want, but we all fear it's too soon. Am I being unreasonable?

My thoughts exactly. My family is going through much worse at the moment.

There’s absolutely nothing to do in Gretna Green, it’s not exactly a holiday hotspot! Why would they want to elope? They’re teenagers…they probably love the romance of it all! 🤷‍♀️ and why are they keeping it a secret….?

Help please my day is far worse than yours!
Its raining, I have to walk into the village and buy sausages from the butcher
Than I have to collect a book from the library
And walk home.

It’s not easier to get married in Gretna Green than anywhere else in the country, but I can’t think of any other reason to go except for the romantic association with elopement because there’s absolutely nothing else of interest there!

I absolutely understand why you wouldn’t want your grandson getting married under the circumstances, it’s likely an extremely silly plan. Hopefully all that’s happened is that they’ve picked a boring place to go on holiday. If they do get married though you’ll just have to hope they end up being one of the few couples who find that a somewhat rash marriage was actually a good idea!

😂😂

Blimey.

Poor OP - 'fear the worst' is a figure of speech, not a flipping pronouncement about the level of her life problems 🙈🙈🙈
Stand down, people!!

OP - 19 year olds going for a week's holiday to Gretna Green is a bit odd, yes.

Two teens getting married is also a bit of an 'eeeek' moment for family, though not a lot you can do except advise them to wait?

Hope you get the bottom of it.

Its a historic site nothing else... you can't just run away and get married anymore. Think you have read too many romance novels.

I think the only place within the kingdom you can get married without wait times, loads of paperwork and red tape is Gibraltar and by the time you go through the hassle of booking flights and shit thats hardly a moonlight flit either.

Sticking to the facts, he's going to Scotland for the weekend with his girlfriend.

It's the neighbour with dementia who introduced the concept of Gretna Green.

There is zero reason for them to be getting married in Gretna Green at weekend, and absolutely no reliable evidence that it is happening!

Also, do they drive?

When we go to the lake district we tend to stay in Travelodges etc... in utterly random places because its cheap. Its just a bed and you can then go ANYWHERE.

We have gone on holiday to motorway service stops often if your just counting the landing location AS the holiday. Obviously you then go off to more exciting places to do stuff in the surrounding area.

I get where you are coming from, they are only 19, very young and haven't really experienced much of life, but if they are getting married (my money is on them not doing it) there's isn't anything you can do, except grit your teeth and congratulate them

You can ask him if he's going to get married, why don't you do that and put your mind at rest?

The grandson confirmed they are going there.

I thought this was about death or serious illness.

Count your blessings.

Blimey what a bunch of pedants - 'the worst', is merely a term of phrase referring to something the op prefers not to happen. How difficult anyone else's lives are, has nothing to do with it. Mumsnet is full of problems lesser or greater than our own.

Do you think he’s winding you up?

My best guess is that the op is having a bit of a jolly with us, by posting a precis of some specific novel by Georgette Heyer or similar.

My son is 19 and been with his girlfriend for 1yr who is also 19. I wouldn’t be impressed if he got married, but at the end of the day he’s an adult and his choice. Definitely worse things happen at sea and all that

Thank you to most of you for your replies. The majority have helped ease my worries and yes it's right that I can't change it even if I think it's too soon. We've got no problem with his girlfriend at all, we just worry about them making a rash decision and things nor working out for them.

Yes, 'fear the worst' wasn't meant to be a literal statement, thank you to the people who pointed this out. Maybe I should have chosen a different turn of phrase, but no offence was intended towards anyone going through difficult times. I will definitely update this thread as to what happens

It's not really any of your business if you think it's too soon.

It's not you getting married.

From a 39 year old who got married at 19.

I wish he was. But they're definitely going there

Well if they do, and it doesn’t work out they can get divorced…they’re adults.
For what it’s worth, DH and I have been together since teenagers, 30 years ago now. We didn’t get married till early 20’s but wouldn’t have been a disaster if we had.

I can't see what they're going to do at Gretna Green for a whole week.
Why would they choose to go there unless they have naive romantic views of a wedding and weeks honeymoon? Perhaps they think they can just rock up and walk in and be wed.
Surely they'd have gone to Edinburgh or Glasgow or somewhere where there are places to see and things to do.

I'd ask outright.

If my Gran thought I was going to Gretna Green to elope with my boyfriend of a few months I would enjoy winding her up with that, I really wouldn’t worry about it unless it actually happens. Maybe they just want to go to Scotland? Have you asked them what their plans are when they’re there?