To think our first house purchase should be our forever home?

[heydorothy]

There’s hardly any flats available near where we live. I know 20 years ago-10 years ago even, it made sense for people to buy small and build lots of equity then move up the ladder to somewhere bigger etc. It just doesn’t seem practical now.

House prices are stagnating now but obviously still very high. I wouldn’t say they’re gaining value like before at all. We have our deposit but renting currently as it is cheaper to do so while interest rates are sky high. When we do move, we’ll have our first DC to think about too.

AIBU to look for no less than a 3 bed / buy as big as we can afford to? I am neurodivergent and moving frequently causes me stress and it would be nice to just put down roots somewhere that feels permanent enough. We could buy a two bed but then we would likely have to move again, fork out for another set of legal fees and stamp duty.

You cannot control everythjng in life. Buywhat makes sense for , the next 5, 10 years. Biggest you cqn afford in the location you want... But you might find in 7 you need to move for some reason.

After exh and I had our DD we moved to a 2 bedroom terrace in quiet cul du sac. We then had our ds. Were lucky enough to be able to add an extra bedroom. When we split I bought him out. Dd has moved out and Ds will eventually. I will never leave my wee house. I have great neighbours, 10 mins from station and local shopping centre. It is quiet and overlooks a park. Have my own private back garden. It's my wee bolt hole x

Interest rates are certainly not Sky high. They are still fairly low.

Aside from that, I am reminded of the saying “when people make plans, God laughs.”

Just buy the best you can, allowing for the chance rates might rise or something else could cause difficulties. It’s quite a privilege to be able to buy your forever home as a FTB but if you can afford it, good luck to you.

I have never intentionally bought a house as a stepping stone to the next one and always went into it as my “forever home”. But my needs have changed which has caused me to to need to move. I have been in this house for 5 years and love it, I have no plans to move but who knows what might happen down the line.

How much of a deposit do you have? I’m saving for a house at the moment. Currently live with parents. I would deff think moving into your ‘forever’ home if you could would be ideal as I would also hate to move again (not even don’t the process once yet but have heard it’s bloody exhausting and stressful). But that is me, and I am very sensitive to stress lol! Go for it if you can. But only if you can afford it, as the stress you will save from moving will likely multiply ten fold if you are living in a house you can’t really afford or have to sacrifice so much for merely to live in it xx

We totally maxed out to buy 4 bedroom in good area with excellent schools
DC now at Uni, we will watch and wait and sell at the top of the market on basis we will sell out at best price and will then move on

I think most people think that way, OP, so I don’t think you are unreasonable, it’s more that most people can’t afford to buy their forever home from the get go otherwise most would.

Personally, I own a 3-bedroom place, but my main criteria buying it was that I wanted to either be mortgage-free or have a mortgage I could easily pay back and ideally quickly (honestly I dislike debt and so the idea of a 30 year mortgage that would be dependent on me always earning similar amounts, just made me really uncomfortable). Thankfully, I bought in a place where housing is fairly affordable and where buying a 3 bedroom place could actually be cheaper than buying a 1-bedroom or 2-bedroom (it’s not London. But think of the cost of buying a 2-bedroom flat in central London vs 3 bedroom in London Zone 3 or 4. Except in my case it would be the choice between buying a studio on the sea front vs a 3 bedroom place 2 miles away. So I am still central just not sea front.) I bought a 3-bedroom because it it did make sense for me to get the “most out of my budget” but if a 3 bedroom had costed double the price and forced me to get an important mortgage I wouldn’t have done it and picked whatever led to the least debt tbh.

And yet, I bought it knowing it’s not my forever home. I love my new place, but I have no doubt that my needs in 10 years or even 5 will be very different to now, I move a lot and like to change and I know what I was able to afford here (a big place for a decent price) I definitely won’t get in a city like say, London. And so I do know that a change would mean likely, in my case “downsizing” (personally I don’t intend to have 3 kids so I couldn’t even picture having the need to ever upsize and get 4 or 5 bedroom house so it’s not even something I am considering.)

So yes, weirdly enough I could see myself moving to “New York” and live in a one-bedroom apartment in 5 years time, and not blink twice. Space wasn’t my criteria when buying, it was price. I have no mortgage and so it now mean I can save up most of what I earn to get a next property if I chose to. I think to me that’s a lot more valuable than overstretching myself space wise and price wise and then spend the next 2 decades living pennies to pennies. I personally would rather be a bit cramped but financially comfortable than have the space and nice house but worry about losing it until the last repayment. But personally I have also never been that attached to havinv the best house. I come from a poor background so having a decent bed and roof over my head is great in and and by itself. I don’t crave a fancy house and I cannot phantom spending close to a million on a place ever. EVER. I wouldn’t even be able to enjoy it knowing how much and how long it would take to repay.

So I think it’s fair to buy your dream home if you can but I would still be wary of overstretching yourself. I think the extra space might not always be worth the stress.