Boyfriend went out to a place we both love with friends without inviting me

[Goldbracelet24]

Hi all. I don't know if I'm being silly here.

Me and my boyfriend discovered this great venue. On certain nights it has live entertainment that we love to see. Only me and my boyfriend had been here and I considered it 'our' place. We've only been twice.

This morning I woke up to a message from my boyfriend telling me he'd been here again last night with friends. He said he saw all the live entertainment. I would have been happy for him if it were any other venue but I cannot help but feel hurt that he went without inviting me knowing how much I love the place and entertainment.

This may just be my initial reaction and I may be overreacting. Am I being unreasonable?

It’s not like he took another woman to your favourite romantic restaurant. It’s a pub with a band on!

What he just out with his friends, or was it mostly couples and you weren't invited? The former is absolutely fine, why shouldn't he share a great place with his friends; but if it's the latter then I would be miffed too!

If the sexes were swapped in this question…

Adults can go out without a partner, adults can go somewhere you like without you.

where would you draw the line? Can he eat a food you like without you? Watch a film you like without you?

Of course you’re being silly

Time to dump him and move on. You deserve so much better than this.

It's a public venue, you don't own it, he is allowed to go out with his friends to public places.

I think some of the replies you’ve had are a bit harsh .

It’s normal to feel disappointed and like you’ve missed out on something .He’s not unreasonable to go there with friends though. The logical response is to suggest you go there together again soon

Yes, I think you are, sorry. Some things might legitimately feel like things you only do together (weekend break in Paris, walk in a certain wood etc) but a really good local venue for a night out? It's a bit restrictive to ring fence that as a couple thing.

Well, it’s sweet that he thinks it’s so great that he took his mates, and sweet that he told you.

Just tell him you’d love to come too next time.

You’ve been there twice and it’s ‘our place’ 🙄 🙄 No, it’s not your place, it’s a venue you’ve been to twice that you both liked and your boyfriend wanted to share with his friends. Get over it.

Its great you can see it’s silly, the problem would be if you couldn’t. 👍

You are overreacting- he can go where he likes on a night out and he obviously thought

it was fab place to go so went with mates! How long have you been together because you have to let stuff like this go! In the whole scheme of things it really doesn’t matter.

What matters is that he communicates with you the next day to tell you about the night and presumably keep you up to date with how it went.