AIBU to be thinking about not returning from mat leave?

[HollyLondoner]

I work in a very old school giant corporate who don't approve part time work or job shares. The first thing my boss told me when I said I was pregnant was that I can't come back part time but I've submitted a flexible working request to try my luck.

Long story short, they were shit when I was pregnant and had written me off as soon as I told them. Now I'm away from my job, I do not miss it or the people and maybe I needed time to reflect.

My partner earns 50k so around £2500 a month and our outgoings currently are around £1500 including everything. This might change with mortgage rates next year.

If I returned full time (30k) on £1900 a month and paid £1600 for nursery I would be £300 better off.

I do not owe them mat pay as they pay bonuses for returning instead.

AIBU for not returning and looking for something better? I don't feel any loyalty anymore.

My partner has also suggested waiting until our baby is 2 so we'd hopefully get 30 hours if the new changes go ahead. Also really struggling to find part time work that pays a decent wage.

Thoughts?

@BarbaraofSeville @Catza that's right, student loan, post grad loan and a large NHS pension contribution.

It is absolutely insane that your head is saying “£300 better off”.

1. What about the cumulative pensions contributions both yours at source and employer match? What does that amount to monthly?
2. What about your CV and the absence of a gap? Your profile and progression?

It is bizarre that instead of proposing a proportionate solution (ie look for a new employer in new/same sector) to your “problem” (shit employer) your response to the problem is “let’s quit the workforce - cos only £300”. Unsurprising as hell of course but never fails to blow my mind.

Ideally I would find something part time while I'm on mat leave but so far I'm not seeing much!

I worked in marketing for 8 years and had a much more senior job and since leaving London worked 5 years in a sort of account management job so I feel very out of touch with marketing and not sure what to do.

Don’t forget travel costs, clothing, work lunches will easily eat into that £300. Enjoy those 2 years with your baby!

I vote find an alternative (perhaps part time) job.

I'm so so glad I have my part time job. I'd have gone nuts as a SAHM personally.

I also don't like how the parenting dynamic is quite unbalanced among families I know with SAHM. The Dad (in the families I know, it's a SAHM and a working Dad) is nervous changing nappies or choosing meals for the DC and always defers to the SAHM.

I'm really glad DH and I don't have that. Also, we are hugely better off than if I were SAHM, now that my dd has some 3yo funded hours. We just had to push through a couple of expensive years.

Finally, if you're hoping/planning for a second baby, there's no paid mat leave if you're a SAHM (I know the government does give a small amount of statutory mat pay). I'm about to go on my second mat leave.

Also just a side note, I have 7k in savings as I saved as much as I could before I went on mat leave in case I ended up in this situation/ wanted to extend my leave.

You need to budget for some private pension contributions for yourself if you don't go back to come out of the family pot of money

Just an update, my work miraculously approved me returning 3 days a week! I realise I was probably being irrational with not returning but it can feel like the only option with childcare being so bloody expensive!
I return to my job, get my bonuses after 6 months and see if I still enjoy being there and if it works for us. I think I will most likely end up staying for now!