To just keep the items friend wanted?

[Shuldda]

I recently visited an outlet store and asked friend if she wanted anything. She said x, y, z. Totalling £20.

That was 2 weeks ago. She's not mentioned collecting them. She never sent the money and in the meantime my birthday passed and she didn't even call or send a card (we usually got out for lunch and do presents but I didn't hear from her at all bar a generic happy day txt)

I got some of the items myself and really love them and wish I'd gotten more. It's far away, the outlet!

AIBU to just keep the ones I bought for her and if she asks for them in the future just say 'well you never mentioned them or paid for them so I assumed you didn't want them after all?'

Did you tell her you'd got them for her?

Yes, I was sending he pics in the store so she could choose, I sent her a pic when I got home of the items too. She said thanks but never paid and hasn't mentioned it since.

She’s rude. Keep them - she’s not paid for them weeks later so she can’t complain when you say you thought she no longer wanted them.

I'd just say to her did she still want them as you've got a good home for them - then mention going out for your birthday in a day or two - not worth losing friends over IMO

Yeah keep them, she should get some manners if she wants things like this in the future

Hhhhhmmmm. ….. if a good friend, maybe ask her if she wants them, and hand them over when she pays.

But, was her behaviour odd with regard to your birthday?

A different approach could be that if she mentions the items, you say you decided to give them to yourself for your birthday…..but she might not like that! Would you mind if it upset her?

YANBU, just tell her you never heard from her so you gave them away.

"Hi friend. I still have your items here, you owe me xyz for them. If you have changed your mind let me know."

It's more than just the ignored shopping items that would bother me.
She's also ignored your birthday!

She's either being "LTB" level rude, or maybe she's going through a mental health crisis or something? A bereavement? Serious health issues? I'd give the benefit of the doubt before getting too upset.

I'd be worrying there's something wrong with her if she's a good friend and has strangely gone quiet - especially missing your birthday if she usually sees you and gives you a present. Have you checked she's ok?

I think you need to communicate clearly and with actual words not some random photos that leave her with no idea about whether those were the items for her or whether you were showing her your new shopping haul or what have you.

Something like "Hey I've got these items waiting for you, can you send £20 to (bank details etc) and let me know when you'd like to collect?"

Just make it really easy for her to know how to pay and collect.

If you'd wanted them for yourself you should have bought your own!

Similar happened to me. She turned up a month later to get her stuff. I'd returned it 2 days before. Because I'd heard nothing for almost a month, and I was a poor student. She made me feel bad for returning it, but I didn't want to be stuck with it and needed the £20. Ask your friend to send you the money and when is she going to collect. If she goes quiet, you can use/return it.

I’d text and say do you want these, or will keep them …

Jesus, it's £20 not £200. It has been 2 weeks, over the Christmas period. If you consider her a good friend then it would be wanky to give the stuff away.
Instead, try communication. 'Hi, I'm having a post-Christmas clear out. If you still want that stuff, please can you let me know by tomorrow. Otherwise I'll pop them on Vinted. Thanks'.

This is an old thread - started beginning November. Hopefully OP has resolved it now