To all onder if social cues can be learnt

[Dollydoo2244]

My nearly 4 year old struggles with social cues. He will do things like talk over other children, try to play with them when they are not engaging and generally try and make connections in an overenthusiastic way when it sometimes not reciprocated. He's had a SEN assesment and there were no concerns and no referrals needed so it's not that. Just wondering how I can help him and if these things come with time or not? Anyone else experience this and did there child catch on in the end? He just gets very overexcited and I'm worried he's going to annoy other kids when he starts school and not have any friends :(

Yes, of course, if social behaviours were innate and unteachable there would be no cultural differences. Obviously usual disclaimer about SEN/ neurodiversity. It's a question of practice and guidance, from both you and school (but mostly you, tbh). Coach him in the moment "Come on Harry, I don't think James wants to play just now, see how he's turned away? That's ok, we can find someone else. What could you say to your friend to see if they want to play?" Etc etc....

@TerribleWoman yes we do that but he isn't quite cottoning on just yet but we will give it time. What do you mean by usual disclaimer re SEN/Neurodiversity do you mean these can be indicators like I say it's been ruled at the moment

I’m still learning as an adult (on the spectrum), of course he can learn at 4!

Just be very patient and loving when teaching him… and make sure you are telling him what you would like him to do, rather than telling him what not to do. For example… “please wait for someone to finish speaking”, rather than “don’t talk over people.”

I mean that obviously an autistic child will have differences in their social development which is part of the condition and can't just be taught. But as your son has had that ruled out then just carry on teaching.

Because someone was bound to pick me up on saying that social rules can be taught if I hadn't mentioned that some kids have specific difficulties in that area.