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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was dd being unreasonable to do this?

16 replies

Aurasauras · 05/11/2023 12:39

Dd is a computer engineer and has worked hard to get qualifications in her chosen field. She took a job which promised progression and so was very happy. The jd did include a little data processing but mostly the work she wanted to do. Dd is exceptionally good at data entry so always did a good job while making sure she was good at the main part of her job. She’s had three weekends off all year which contributed to the end of the relationship (ex was stalking too but that’s another thread). In the last month she’s been made to do data entry 18 times- she’s counted and not one of the other engineers has been made to do it more than two or three times. There is also constant low level bullying. One weekend she was due to be off, someone added her to the rota and wrecked her weekend. The final straw was getting a huge telling off about one piece of data entry work- that she shouldn’t be doing because she’s a computer engineer. She has tried to bring this up politely and assertively and has emailed numerous times about things like her tax code being wrong for the last four months, her hours being wrong etc. She’s never got an answer to the emails.

So to the point after being publicly humiliated on Wednesday she’s spent two days doing her data entry as slowly as possible and then quit. There are no issues with her computer engineer work btw apparently she’s great at it. WSBU?

OP posts:
Hipnotised · 05/11/2023 12:45

Sounds a shit show, why would you think people would say she may be unreasonable?

Aurasauras · 05/11/2023 12:47

She’s inconsolable with nothing to go to.

I’ve always said never leave a job unless you have another but she said she couldn’t take any more.

OP posts:
nocoolnamesleft · 05/11/2023 12:50

The other computer engineers who don't have to do data entry, are they perchance male?

starlightcan · 05/11/2023 12:53

Shit happens, sounds like an awful environment, she was probably hasty to leave but now she can look to the next step. Will she get a reference?

I’m sure there will be loads of interesting positions available to her. Could she sign up to a free course in the meantime to maintain some structure and forward momentum while she’s putting in applications for new roles? (Thinking some of the free 8 and 12 week part time courses by Code First Girls, for example.)

SM4713 · 05/11/2023 12:53

Sounded pretty shit and she clearly wasn't happy. IF she has ongoing issues wrong pay, if the HR department are shit, she could ask ACAS. I assume she will need to be mindful of what money she does have, and start looking for another job. Not really sure what advice you are after?

starlightcan · 05/11/2023 12:53

nocoolnamesleft · 05/11/2023 12:50

The other computer engineers who don't have to do data entry, are they perchance male?

Well indeed

PickledPurplePickle · 05/11/2023 12:53

Sounds like a nightmare - though tax codes can only be changed by HMRC, they then notify the company of the change

Not sure exactly what your question is

SisterMichaelsHabit · 05/11/2023 12:54

Of course she wasn't unreasonable. And she's just back to where she was before she quit. She needs to start the job search as if this never happened.

Kittenkitty · 05/11/2023 12:54

workplace bullying, overwork and abuse are not conducive to looking for another job. She’ll be feeling too low, tired and hopeless. If she can afford it suggest she has 1-2 weeks to rest and then starts looking for work.

OhNoForever · 05/11/2023 12:54

nocoolnamesleft · 05/11/2023 12:50

The other computer engineers who don't have to do data entry, are they perchance male?

This

Bournetilly · 05/11/2023 12:56

She wasn’t unreasonable to quit but if it was me I would of found another job first.

Doggymummar · 05/11/2023 12:57

Computer engineers are on about £80k no way should they be doing data entry, sounds like sexist bullshit to me. She is well out of it.

Aurasauras · 05/11/2023 12:57

OhNoForever · 05/11/2023 12:54

This

Yes, in a word.

OP posts:
fitforflight · 05/11/2023 12:59

I know nothing about your daughter's field, and whether data entry is common/expected etc so I won't comment on that side of things, nor do I have any HR training so the hours being wrong, preferential treatment to other employees isn't my wheelhouse. I am, however, an accountant, and one point I would make is her tax code being wrong isn't her employer's issue to fix. In fact, they can't. HMRC will send them a coding notice and payroll must process her pay using this code. If it's wrong she needs to speak to HMRC and get it sorted, so they can send a revised coding notice to the employer.

Aurasauras · 05/11/2023 13:58

I think I mean she is paying the wrong tax or something. Thanks for your advice everyone, she is seeing her gaming friends tonight so hopefully that will cheer her up a little. I am trying to just be supportive and not to fix it for her or tell her what to do.

OP posts:
Aprilx · 05/11/2023 14:07

Aurasauras · 05/11/2023 13:58

I think I mean she is paying the wrong tax or something. Thanks for your advice everyone, she is seeing her gaming friends tonight so hopefully that will cheer her up a little. I am trying to just be supportive and not to fix it for her or tell her what to do.

On this particular point, the employer was not in the wrong, it is for your daughter to sort her tax code out, not the employer, they use the code they are given.

Otherwise, no your daughter wasn't unreasonable to leave, although looking for a new job first might have made more sense.

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