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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this shop assistant was rude

28 replies

Mccoys · 04/11/2023 23:09

I went into a small shop today with my daughter (2) and my mum. Started having a look round and the shop assistant saw us. My daughter had took her hair clip out and was putting it near her mouth. I was about to tell her not too and shop assistant said ‘don’t you put that in your mouth, you will choke and will be taken to the hospital’. She then scowled at me.

My daughter was starting to get tired. We carried on looking round the shop and she started having a tantrum and making a scene so I picked her up and took her straight out the shop and went outside. On the way out the shop assistant gave us a disapproving look and looked down her nose at us and tutted. My mum stayed in the shop and apparently when we left the shop assistant was shaking her head and let out a big sigh. Aibu to think she was rude?

OP posts:
VeniVidiWeeWee · 04/11/2023 23:30

Gosh, trying to stop your child potentially choking to death and she was rude?

Give me strength.

angelikacpickles · 04/11/2023 23:32

VeniVidiWeeWee · 04/11/2023 23:30

Gosh, trying to stop your child potentially choking to death and she was rude?

Give me strength.

She wasn't though, was she? If she was genuinely concerned, she could have told the OP nicely that the child was about to put the clip in her mouth, rather than scolding the child.

VeniVidiWeeWee · 05/11/2023 00:00

@angelikacpickles

FFS Read the op.

She didn't scold the child she warned them that they might choke

angelikacpickles · 05/11/2023 00:13

VeniVidiWeeWee · 05/11/2023 00:00

@angelikacpickles

FFS Read the op.

She didn't scold the child she warned them that they might choke

FFS yourself. I did read it.

OnlyFannys · 05/11/2023 00:17

FFS

TomeTome · 05/11/2023 00:20

Well putting a clip in your mouth doesn’t mean you will choke and go to hospital. She was being a dick.

Pinkitydrinkity0 · 05/11/2023 00:24

Maybe she encounters lots of children running loose in the shop and is fed up? Maybe she was just having a bad day? Who knows. It’s not a big deal.

Manadou · 05/11/2023 00:25

Oh, these rude common shop assistants and their tutting! Get her the sack, and teach your daughter to be entitled like you so clearly are.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 05/11/2023 00:31

Very Pretty Woman.

You should’ve said, “Big mistake. Huge. I have to go shopping now…”

Joking aside I avoid shops now because sometimes you do feel like an utter inconvenience. I guess an empty shop means less work.

VeniVidiWeeWee · 05/11/2023 00:59

@angelikacpickles

"FFS yourself. I did read it."

So at which part of the op does it say that the shop worker scolded the child?

Jewelspun · 05/11/2023 01:03

Get a grip.

Why would you even care what some random shop worker thinks of you?

HappiDaze · 05/11/2023 01:14

Jewelspun · 05/11/2023 01:03

Get a grip.

Why would you even care what some random shop worker thinks of you?

Yes

Exactly this

Why would care enough about such a brief insignificant encounter to come into MN to complain about it

ButtonFork · 05/11/2023 01:17

FFS

Froooty · 05/11/2023 01:34

Maybe she was rude. Maybe she was worried. Maybe she tutted because you gave her a death stare when she actually cared because it happened to her child. Maybe she was having a shit day because five other customers had been arseholes to her.

Get some perspective, speak to yourself in the mirror and remind yourself it takes a village to raise a child - get over it and move on. Life is too short.

MayMi · 05/11/2023 02:15

There's a kids clothes/misc shop I go to with my 2 year old DD, and there's this one shop assistant there who for some reason gets annoyed with kids no matter what 🤷🏼‍♀️ why she works there is beyond me. Examples of what makes her scowl at me and at my DD include:

  • DD gently touching (not pulling or moving) a product
  • DD taking one basket out of the basket pile, putting it on the floor then putting it back into the pile
  • me trying to put DD in the cart and DD sticking her legs out everywhere so I can't do it (also I'm visibly pregnant and can't lift her for a long time)
  • DD loudly saying 'snack!' when she sees the snack section
  • me trying to find the right size clothing and having to file through the things (not knocking anything off obviously)

My DD is actually quite well behaved for a 2 year old. It seems as though this person expects children to be like tiny adults or robots? 😒 It used to bother me but now I just this this person is silly 🙃

hoobanoobie · 05/11/2023 03:30

People judge very quickly on a snapshot of your life. I find that's it's much more about them than you. They know nothing more than their glimpse, tailored by their own judgement. Don’t take it to heart, they have no idea. Especially when their go to reaction from a single interaction is nasty for no reason. It shows who they are.

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 05/11/2023 03:52

I don't understand people who obsess over every little incident in their daily lives, whether real or perchieved. Even if she was rude, why do you actually care?

curaçao · 05/11/2023 04:48

MayMi · 05/11/2023 02:15

There's a kids clothes/misc shop I go to with my 2 year old DD, and there's this one shop assistant there who for some reason gets annoyed with kids no matter what 🤷🏼‍♀️ why she works there is beyond me. Examples of what makes her scowl at me and at my DD include:

  • DD gently touching (not pulling or moving) a product
  • DD taking one basket out of the basket pile, putting it on the floor then putting it back into the pile
  • me trying to put DD in the cart and DD sticking her legs out everywhere so I can't do it (also I'm visibly pregnant and can't lift her for a long time)
  • DD loudly saying 'snack!' when she sees the snack section
  • me trying to find the right size clothing and having to file through the things (not knocking anything off obviously)

My DD is actually quite well behaved for a 2 year old. It seems as though this person expects children to be like tiny adults or robots? 😒 It used to bother me but now I just this this person is silly 🙃

Well for a start she is playing with her stock and shopping baskets! They are not toys to be played with.
Maybe you need to gi to a gym and work out uf you ate not strong enough to overpower a 2 year old's legs?

Inyourwildestdreams · 05/11/2023 05:15

Joking aside I avoid shops now because sometimes you do feel like an utter inconvenience. I guess an empty shop means less work.

@TheLightSideOfTheMoon Please don’t tar us all with the same brush. You encounter rude people all though life, does that stop you from ever going out?! It’s no wonder the high street is dying off with attitudes like this.
I’m a retail manager and I can assure you that none of our customers have or will ever be made to feel like an inconvenience. They are the reason myself and my staff can pay our bills and provide for our families!
If you receive shitty service or attitude and want to avoid that shop then fine but it’s ridiculous to avoid all shops!

sollenwir · 05/11/2023 05:34

You've painted a nice picture of her appearing rude, but I wonder how her sequence of events would read.

MayMi · 05/11/2023 05:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Princesspollyyy · 05/11/2023 06:30

She was rude. It wasn't her place to speak directly to your daughter and tell her that about the hair clip. None of her business.

And the scowling and tutting? I would have said excuse me, what's your problem? Are you paid to scowl and tut at me?

CrazyHedgehogLover · 05/11/2023 09:15

No she was being rude, I work in retail and I would never dream of going up to someone else’s child saying “you might choke and go to hospital” clearly you was stood with her? So that was obviously very unlikely.

that would have probably scared the shit out of her, probably potentially could have lead to her having the tantrum/meltdown aswell all because the shop assistant couldn’t keep her mouth shut and mind her own business.

sounds like bad customer service to me, tutting and sighing, saying that comment.. if that was me doing this I would expect to be complained about.

as for the others saying “she might be having a bad day” still doesn’t excuse bad customer service really does it?

Manadou · 05/11/2023 09:21

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 05/11/2023 03:52

I don't understand people who obsess over every little incident in their daily lives, whether real or perchieved. Even if she was rude, why do you actually care?

It does seem as if Mumsnet attracts a fair proportion of people who, shall I say, process the events of everyday life 'differently' or are especially 'sensitive' to this or that. Plus preggers-entitlement and toddler-mummy-entitlement.

Nokoolaidherethanks · 05/11/2023 09:26

If she was concerned for the child's safety and thought the mum hadn't seen, she could have said something to mum, or something nicer to the child eg, 'oh I wouldn't put that in your mouth' not an unnecessarily threatening sounding warning. Also anyone who tuts about a child having a tantrum obviously has never had a child and therefore doesn't get to judge other people's parenting.