To be embarrassed by these memories

Mumeries · 2023-11-03T18:54:46+00:00

When I was about 6 or 7 I was free to roam around town by myself. I got an ice cream from a van and instead of paying I ran off with it. I don’t remember if I had the money. I also stole coins from the change jar to buy sweets from the sweet shop. I would also steal little things from school. I didn’t grow up to be a criminal but was what I did as a child a bad sign? What does it mean? No one actually knows and I am still embarrassed by it

Mumsanetta · 03/11/2023 19:03

It means you were sometimes a bit of a naughty child. Or acting out because your parents let you roam around town on your own at such a young age. Were you neglected as a child? If you have memories that you are struggling to let go of it might be worth speaking to a therapist to try and unpick why.

Withnailandsigh · 03/11/2023 19:13

Crikey! The stuff I got up to would give you nightmares. I was an awful teen too, really nasty at times. As far as im aware, Im a very nice person as an adult- too nice because I get bullied and shat on alot!
I know what you mean though, one thing that sticks out for me ( and I stole and vandalised loads) was that a girl in my glass reached out for my arm on some climbing equipment at lunch but she’d been eating an apple and was all sticky so I panicked and pushed her away and she hurt herself and looked so awfully sad. That bothers me much more than getting banned from the co op for my kleptomania or stuffing the warm air heating vents at school with the cut grass from the field so that come autumn they’d fill the halls with hay and cause chaos. I was a wee shitbag.

0scillating · 03/11/2023 19:15

Shoplifters of the world! Unite and take over!

category12 · 03/11/2023 19:18

How come you were wandering around on your tod at that age?

Where were your parents? What was your homelife like?

Little children stealing things doesn't mean you were doing it out of naughtiness, but could have been from need, whether emotional or physical.

Doubt it was a bad sign about your character - more likely that there was an issue at home.

HungryButterfly · 03/11/2023 19:19

Your parents should be embarrassed of letting you roam around not you.

Withnailandsigh · 03/11/2023 19:22

@category12 it doesn’t say how old the OP is but in the 80’s and 90’s it was pretty common for kids as young as 5 to take themselves to school, play out and stay home alone while parents worked. It was certainly common where I lived anyway. I was out shoplifting and being a nuisance at 5/6 regularly.

Dramatic · 03/11/2023 19:23

The fact you haven't grown up to be a horrible person and you still carry guilt from these things shows that it obviously wasn't a bad sign. You were a kid learning right from wrong and sometimes acting out. Nothing you did is shockingly awful, I wouldn't keep beating yourself up about it.

Daisybuttercup12345 · 03/11/2023 19:27

Withnailandsigh · 03/11/2023 19:22

@category12 it doesn’t say how old the OP is but in the 80’s and 90’s it was pretty common for kids as young as 5 to take themselves to school, play out and stay home alone while parents worked. It was certainly common where I lived anyway. I was out shoplifting and being a nuisance at 5/6 regularly.

The post says 6 or 7.

TheDarkDarkNight · 03/11/2023 19:29

Withnailandsigh · 03/11/2023 19:22

@category12 it doesn’t say how old the OP is but in the 80’s and 90’s it was pretty common for kids as young as 5 to take themselves to school, play out and stay home alone while parents worked. It was certainly common where I lived anyway. I was out shoplifting and being a nuisance at 5/6 regularly.

I agree it was common to roam at an early age. Different times!
We’d go out and come back when we were hungry.

Op my DS shoplifted age 6, and we were with him! We had no clue until we were getting him ready for bed and found things in his pockets. He isn’t a tear away now or anything. Don’t worry about it, you were just finding your way in the world.

TheDarkDarkNight · 03/11/2023 19:29

@Daisybuttercup12345 I think they mean how old op is now.

Fionaville · 03/11/2023 19:32

Just forget about it. I did some stupid stuff when I was a child too. It's not your fault. Forgive yourself, or rather the child you were and move on.

BackToRealMe · 03/11/2023 19:36

We were also on our own a lot, we went 'stealing', once spat an apple around on the flat corridors, poured water on people from the balcony.
My mother had to do OT at work so we were bored out of our minds. And scared a lot of the times.

PersephonePomegranate23 · 03/11/2023 19:36

it doesn’t say how old the OP is but in the 80’s and 90’s it was pretty common for kids as young as 5 to take themselves to school, play out and stay home alone while parents worked. It was certainly common where I lived anyway. I was out shoplifting and being a nuisance at 5/6 regularly.

This wasn't very common where I lived, but the kids that did invariably got up to mischief and into scraps. The parents were broadly negligent and didn't give a toss about what their kids got up to!

Their behaviour was down to their parents, not the kids' fault at all.

JaneJeffer · 03/11/2023 19:44

Stop thief!

thistimelastweek · 03/11/2023 19:52

We've all done stuff we wake up cringing about. Every last one of us.
Always comforting to blame someone else - parents are easy - but sometimes there's no-one else to blame.

Because we're human
And children are just people who are still learning.

Cut yourself some slack. You weren't bad, you weren't criminal. You were just a kid. And kids do daft stuff.