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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this enough for Halloween?

60 replies

Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 22:52

Dd is 5, she went to a friends Halloween themed birthday party, we’ve decorated, made crafts, decorated biscuits, done a hunt in the house, read books, spooky kids music on YouTube..is this enough? The only things she’s done with friends is the Halloween party..?
Why do I feel such a pressure to have to do so much and where did this come from 😩👻

OP posts:
Fairtobefairohhhhhc · 30/10/2023 22:54

We don't do Halloween at all... no pressure from anyone.

You have done more than enough OP

minipie · 30/10/2023 22:54

My kids have never done anything except carved a pumpkin and gone trick or treating.

Halloween is one evening.

UndercoverCop · 30/10/2023 22:56

Erm we went on a 'pumpkin trail' walk in the woods with clues and only because it was half term and we would've gone to the woods anyway, and carved a £1.75 pumpkin from Tesco.
Done. There was a free parade locally which we've enjoyed before but it was chucking it down so we skipped it.
Why is Halloween such a thing?!

Original poster
Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 22:58

I don’t know why halloween is such a thing now?! Where I am there’s so many different events and things to do. I need to cut back on it for the future, it seems everything is ott

OP posts:
PollyPeep · 30/10/2023 23:01

That all sounds lovely OP, and how nice you're making special memories with your daughter. I didn't realise Halloween was supposed to be such a thing over here and as a result am feeling absolutely no pressure lol. Bonfire night with sparklers, fireworks and pumpkin soup is what we're planning this week, maybe drawing on a pumpkin and making some paper bats if I'm feeling crafty! Hadn't crossed my mind to do anything further. Do fun spooky things if you and your daughter enjoy them, don't if you don't!

Jessforless · 30/10/2023 23:02

I don’t think any occasion should ever bring stress… always do whatever you’re happy to do. That’s enough.

Pinkpinkpink15 · 30/10/2023 23:02

@Ontothenextthingsoon

its more than I can be arsed with these days, but that's why you have kids young!

if you wanted to do other things you could get a few if her friends together to go trick a treat with & carve pumpkins. As you said, there's loads more in so go to anything you fancy or don't if you don't!!

our local pub usually put an evening in for the kids, the host games & stuff, provide snack ms & give the adults plenty of time to spend money at the bar! Win/win.

JustALittlePotatooo · 30/10/2023 23:06

Well, we haven't even managed to get hold of a pumpkin this year so I've decorated some oranges for the kids instead 😂 I just found the cookie cutters I bought last year but obviously haven't had a chance to use them as the kids are asleep. We'll go trick or treating tomorrow (unless it's raining) but haven't actually sorted any outfits for them. The younger one should still fit in the pumpkin outfit I bought from Sainsbury's 6 years ago and the older one will hopefully just be happy with a bit of face paint?! He's only 7 though so maybe not.

Oh well! There's always next year.

Testina · 30/10/2023 23:26

Honestly, I think the “proper” things to do are carve a pumpkin, wear a costume, go trick or treating. So none of what you’ve done would be “enough” for me. I’m not even sure what listening to spooky music is - as an activity. Do you just mean you had it on it the background whilst doing the biscuits? That sounds fun 😃 🎃
But each to their own!

VisiblyNot25 · 30/10/2023 23:31

That sounds lovely!! I personally absolutely love Halloween - what we do which is fun but I think takes the pressure off, is a Halloween box with decorations, Halloween crafts, face paints, a few costume bits etc. I get it out about a week before Halloween & leave it out for the kids to play with as & when they want to. It’s the same stuff every year - maybe with a couple of new bits added if the craft stuff’s run out so low cost. We then also do pumpkin carving (just from the supermarket though rather than a pumpkin patch usually) & trick or treating.

Original poster
Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 23:32

@Testina We’ve carved a pumpkin and with a costume too (no trick or treating in the country we’re in) music on when doing biscuits, having a dance etc 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
Autumnleaves89 · 30/10/2023 23:36

It’s really not a massive thing op. The only pressure you have is from yourself. There’s loads of nice additional activities if you want to do them(soft play centre parties, pumpkin picking etc) but loads of children don’t do these things. Trick or treating is plenty, your kids won’t feel as though they’re missing out unless you tell them they are, I promise! The trick or treat sweeties are the most exciting part 😁

Autumnleaves89 · 30/10/2023 23:37

Sorry just saw your update. What country are you in where Halloween is a think but not trick or treat? Very strange! Maybe buy a few sweeties in for tomorrow night then. Watch a kids Halloween movie and have a cosy night.

Original poster
Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 23:40

@Autumnleaves89 Yes, it’s so annoying about the trick or treat

OP posts:
Testina · 30/10/2023 23:41

Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 23:32

@Testina We’ve carved a pumpkin and with a costume too (no trick or treating in the country we’re in) music on when doing biscuits, having a dance etc 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ah, that might explain why you’re struggling to feel you’ve done enough. Because trick or treating builds it to a natural peak and conclusion. Pumpkin carving for example - the whole point is to decorate for trick or treaters, and costume wearing - for trick or treating in!

You’re spreading it out too much I think. Stick to doing the biscuits and books and dancing to spooky music when it’s actually Hallowe’en! You’ve peaked too early.

Original poster
Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 23:50

@Testina Yes 😂mind you, it’s only tomorrow

OP posts:
Mammyloveswine · 30/10/2023 23:51

We did pumpkin picking for the first time tonight...what a crock of shit and a total rip off! £40 to then pay for pumpkins dumped in a mud patch!!!

DeeCee77 · 31/10/2023 00:18

Ontothenextthingsoon · 30/10/2023 22:58

I don’t know why halloween is such a thing now?! Where I am there’s so many different events and things to do. I need to cut back on it for the future, it seems everything is ott

What country are you in?

Historically, Halloween has been celebrated in Ireland (where I am) and Scotland. In England it has been Guy Fawkes Night that is the main event.

From the mid 80s onward (when I was at primary school) we were off school for the Halloween break.

Things to do:

Apple bobbing (get the apple out of a tub of water with your teeth)
Fireworks (sparklers for a younger child)
Guising (going to door to door in disguise for grub)
Carve pumpkin (I only ever carved turnips as pumpkins here at Halloween wasn't a thing then)

We also built a bonfire (not something your child would do). Also did pranks (knock door run)...again tho not something for your kid.

89redballoons · 31/10/2023 00:25

My DS1 (nearly 4) dressed up as Supertato and we went to a party in our local park on Saturday around teatime. DS2 (18 months) painted a pumpkin at the childminders today.

We have some pumpkin lights in the window and tomorrow will see if any trick or treaters come and possibly if DS1 isn't too tired after preschool he can put on his costume again and go to our neighbours house for one trick or treat.

that's it for us! Bonfire night next Smile

DeeCee77 · 31/10/2023 00:33

Another thing I did at Halloween (and I wouldn't advise it) is eating food (in our case a tart) with a coin hidden in it. It got quite messy as everyone would be rummaging through their slice looking for the coin. My mum's generation (so the 1950s) did this in barmbrack.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barmbrack

Barmbrack - Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barmbrack

mathanxiety · 31/10/2023 01:49

Do you have a bottle of gin handy?

Pour yourself a nice big G&T.

Relax.

CurlewKate · 31/10/2023 05:34

I was always happy to have kid's friends round-but I can't imagine anything more terrifying than supervising more than one 5 year old carving a pumpkin! Wouldn't you need a shuttle service to A&E?

GRex · 31/10/2023 06:33

We do a lot of activities, but that's because we enjoy Halloween as a family. If you don't then that's fine too, do something else you enjoy. It isn't a competition, it's just enjoying life how you choose.

Ihaterhymingrabbit · 31/10/2023 06:38

You need to learn and live the ways of not comparing yourself to others and giving a fuck. All the OTT stuff comes from consumerism and if you don’t like the pressure or it stresses you out then don’t be part of it.

Are you happy?
Are your kids happy?
Have you got nice memories?

Then yes, you’ve done enough.

Almondmum · 31/10/2023 06:39

Is it social media making you feel this pressure? If so maybe limit what you're looking at on there. At 5 you don't have to do anything really. Most 5 year olds are easily pleased.

I used to do a lot with mine because I was a childminder but the only thing they go on about as a fond memory now they're teens is the time I drew a pumpkin face on their satsuma for their lunchbox. So the whole making memories thing is a lot of nonsense too!