To ask if someone could someone live long with this level of drinking?

[mrlistersgelfbride]

Not very night, occasionally not even every week. But when they start they can't stop.

Maybe every Friday and/or Sunday, 20 to 30 units each. Football home matches twice a month, full days drinking say 30 units. Sometimes more, enough to be sick.

Boys trip, maybe 3 times a year, 100 units total.
Holidays, 4 or 5 days out of 7 , 20 to 30 units a day.

If someone drank like this could they live a long life without major health problems?

My partner by the way.
He's a big bloke and alcohol doesn't touch him. He's getting worse as he gets older. We aren't yet 40.

Impossible to say. They could, depends on their genes really.

I doubt it, I would actually say yes for someone from after war generation but nowadays people are much weaker.
However it depends what you mean by live long and major problems. They might live 78 rather than 96 which is not too bad. Or they can have a lot minor problems. Or they can have a major problem but unrelated to drinking.

Thanks. I guess I mean is it possible to drink like that and not get liver problems?

Yes they can. Some alcoholics don't get liver failure of related cancers.
And plenty of non- alcoholics and non drinkers get sick and die.

Regardless of that. It doesn't sound like he's a good partner.

It will catch up with him - liver problems most likely.

It wouldn't necessarily cause liver problems. If you're lucky with your genes the liver is hard to destroy. Of course there's a big element of chance, he might have a more vulnerable liver.
It's not just that though, you say he's a big guy, is he overweight? Does he exercise? Overweight + heavy drinker + sedentary is a recipe for heart issues.

Of course alcohol "touches" him. He isn't bloody Superman. You said yourself he gets sick.

I would find this kind of drinking totally unacceptable and a deal breaker. I would never tolerate this shit.

@Aquamarine1029 Well yes it does . But I have never known anyone to be able to drink so much.

He does exercise but he's overweight, classed as obese by BMI.

I'm totally sick of it.

IANAF. But from your post, it seems alcohol does affect him - drinking until he's sick, for example, it takes a lot of alcohol for him to feel he's had any. I suspect he's well on the way to being an alcoholic. Does he have any alcohol-free days, or weeks? You say he's big: is he overweight, or tall and well-built? People can go on boozing excessively for years; probably not in good health, though, and unlikely to make it much past 70.

Of course some do! Look at the likes of Anthony Hopkins, Peter O'Toole, Richard Harris.

It's a Lottery. Some seem to get away with it. Others who drink far less, don't.

My DH is 64. Joined the Army at 16, and of course went straight into excessive drinking straight away. He's now a recovering alcoholic, it suddenly caught up with him 3 years ago.

Hospitalised twice with severe jaundice. Two stints in detox (cost over 3k), terrible moodiness coming off the booze. Every hour of every day is a battlefield for him.

And me.

He was as fit as a butchers dog before it all caught up with him.

It's the roll of the dice. My grandad drank around 10 pints a day, every day and died a few years back in his early 80s. My other grandad never drank and died at 65.

I don't think he'd be very healthy but he won't die from it. Does he not get hungover to shit?

It is possible to get another problem, he might get dementia , there is a type which is connected with drinking. If he is smoking it might be a bigger factor or his diet. It’s where actually genes coming into consideration. His genes responsible for liver might be particularly strong but for brain - less.

You don't have to stay here now. Marriage isn't a prison sentence. You can leave whenever you like. His drinking will get worse and worse and his mood will too.

A lot of heavy drinking men never have any liver problems.

It takes a heavier toll on women though. Women can't get away with the amounts of alcohol that men can.

What is it that you are sick of?
Are you hoping he will get ill then stop?

He does get hangovers and sleeps all.day.
We have a daughter and when this happens I look after her. I often hate him for it.

It's hard to day regarding genes. Mil doesn't drink. Her father didn't and lived to 94.
Fil liked a couple of strong lagers a day and died aged 72 from something unrelated.
I know people who have died in their 50s from alcoholism.
It does seem like a lottery though.

Its called Korsakoff the dementia. My mum died aged 64 of alcohol related illness, my best school friend likely to have the same end soon aged 53. I left my husband after 24 years of marriage due to alcohol, mental health and related issues- life is much harder financially and practically but at least I’m calling my own shots .

@cestlavielife Yes in some ways. I wish something would make him stop, because he wouldn't do it for me or DD.

Well you have a decision to make. Irrespective of his life length, do you want to stick with him. As he is.

So 8-12 pints once or twice in a week, but not every week. And football matches twice a month about 12 pints all day. It doesn't sound too horrific, does it?

A friend of mine was similar and ended up with diabetes from it. Badly managed diabetes for some time as he isn't the sort to take care of himself, so in the end a permanent automatic pump was installed (permanent line into his vein, a box to wear on a belt under his shirt) so the diabetes management is improved now, but his long term health is more than likely compromised, especially as he still drinks more than he should.
For your dh, sadly, wth drinking like that he is significantly increasing his odds of health problems that will affect quality of life not necessarily cause death. Everything from gout to dementia... So far his relative youth is probably buying him some time, but as he ages the chickens will come home to roost and then he'll discover if he's won the generic lottery (not likely) or not (likely).

Why do you want him to stop?
His moods? His behaviour? The cost?
For his health?

You can leave him then he might realize the impact...or not but you wont have to live with it

He is an adult and responsible for his behaviour and his health
You can only change yours e g do not put up with it by leaving

Is this sarcasm?

My lovely father is a long term alcoholic- fully functioning and absolutely not unpleasant with it in any way-does all his drinking in the evenings, never looks drunk etc. Not violent or abusive in any shape or form. He must have been like this for a good 35 years if not more.
He’s 74 and his liver and other organs are, unfathomably to the medical profession, tip top. He drinks 200+ units a week.

He had a minor stroke this year, that’s the first sign it is catching up with him-although he made a complete recovery.

It’s undoubtedly going to kill him. But he seems to be doing rather better than he should be.