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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To stop breastfeeding at 6 weeks.

48 replies

Mum2HC · 27/10/2023 07:10

Please someone help me, I am so upset and desperate.
I’m on my second bout of mastitis - feeling absolutely rubbish and so tired and weak. I’ve got a ten day antibiotic course this time and still feel rubbish 5 days in (fever and redness has gone)

my boobs are making more milk than they need and I constantly feel sore on a morning.

im having to wake baby for feeds on a night when we would both rather be sleeping.

I have tried block feeding which seemed to work for a bit but I am sore again this morning and going to have to wake baby again.

I have breastfed for 18months before with no issues - I just cannot go on like this - the fear of more mastitis is ruining it for me.

I have seen lactation consultants, gps etc etc and no one seems to be able to give me an answer.

how do I stop if I need to without causing even more mastitis issues?

I feel like my baby is going to get ill all winter if I don’t breastfeed but I just don’t see another option. I’ve never fed a bottle before so wouldn’t even know where to start.

thank you so much

OP posts:

DustyLee123 · 27/10/2023 07:13

So just stop. There is no rule that you have to BF.
I had mastitis, the MW found me in bed shaking. She was so concerned that she went straight to the GP, got a prescription signed, and dropped it off at the chemist for DH to pick up. It’s not nice, and it’s upsetting your bond with baby.

Seasidesusy · 27/10/2023 07:13

My baby was ill all last winter despite being breastfed. Many babies are formula fed from birth.
Don’t beat yourself up. You’ve tried and managed it for 6 weeks which has given baby a great start. It sounds awful for you and you need to look after yourself as well as DC. If it’s not working for you, you need to stop!

Original poster

Mum2HC · 27/10/2023 07:14

Thank you - I just don’t know how to stop as I’m so sore and get mastitis when engorged

OP posts:

DustyLee123 · 27/10/2023 07:17

Stop now while you’re on the antibiotics. Just stop feeding and dont touch them at all. You will get engorged and feel uncomfortable, but go with it.
Touch them minimally in the shower, don’t be tempted to express some to relieve it, you will just make it worse.
Just dig in for a couple of days, and it will go.

TakeMe2Insanity · 27/10/2023 07:17

The mantra is a fed baby is a happy baby. Be kind to yourself. If formula helps use it. Honestly in reception no one can tell who was bf or ff.

Curlewwoohoo · 27/10/2023 07:20

I formula fed from 5m with first and from 5w with second. So I'm fine with that. But I'm not sure if it's a good idea for you to stop while you have mastitis. I thought feeding helped clear it through?

When I was stopping with my first child I had a stomach bug for several days that majorly reduced my milk. When I was stopping with my second child I reduced gradually and also pumped a bit. In the end you just have to flat stop though. Reducing gradually just prolongs things. It did take a while for my milk to dry up. A lot of cabbage leaves down the bra to reduce the heat.

Actually if you have a pump, perhaps that would help clear the mastitis?

I was also going to say that it's not all or nothing. You could give the odd bottle of formula if you're baby will take it to get over this difficult patch. Or even fully combination feed.

Whichever way you go out will get better. Sorry things are hard right now.

CaptainBarnaclesandthevegemals · 27/10/2023 07:20

To stop while reducing the risk of mastitis you have to taper down gradually. This way takes about 3 weeks to switch completely. MWs advised us to drop a feed at a time every three days (swap a breastfeed for a bottle of formula). You can adjust the three days a bit if your body needs more time/can cope with less.

Parker231 · 27/10/2023 07:21

DC’s were only fed on formula - they didn’t get ill. Get a perfect prep machine, some bottles and a microwave steriliser. Best to use whichever formula your local supermarket stocks the most of so that it’s easy to get.

Ostryga · 27/10/2023 07:29

You can’t just stop if you’re already prone to mastitis, terrible advice!

You’ll need to taper down the feeds, and pump just enough off during the missed feeds so you’re comfortable. I would start with feeds in the middle of the day and afternoon when you’re hopefully not too full.

Gradually keep skipping feeds and only pump when you’re uncomfortable. You can take Sudafed which helps dry up milk. It’s a decongestant but it really helps slow milk production.

Perfect Prep machines can give some babies horrible digestive issues, so I’d probably start with making bottles the usual way in the start while you’re transitioning. No point going from a breastfeeding issue to a screaming baby one.

towriteyoumustlive · 27/10/2023 07:44

Are you able to express?

A friend of mine bottle fed her baby with expressed milk as she kept getting mastitis.

She hired a decent pump and found regular pumping prevented the mastitis.

sollenwir · 27/10/2023 07:50

towriteyoumustlive · 27/10/2023 07:44

Are you able to express?

A friend of mine bottle fed her baby with expressed milk as she kept getting mastitis.

She hired a decent pump and found regular pumping prevented the mastitis.

I was going to suggest pumping too, even just to relieve a little of the pressure before baby is ready for next feed. You could freeze it too, and use to make up baby meals/purees etc (or not if you don't want to).
If you do decide to move to formula then try to slowly reduce feeds (and pumping) so your body gets used to it. Baby will gradually adapt too, all being well.
Whatever you decide I hope things improve for you soon.

Londonrach1 · 27/10/2023 07:51

Dd was ff from birth and never ill. She has 100÷ school attendance now every year. Honestly if you want to stop stop. Although not sure if you need to reduce it slowly so if you decide that seek advice. Only you know what's right for you.

If you want to stop I found ff easy and quick and as a result I have amazing bond with dd. I used a pre prep machine...make sure you get the proper filters. Whatever you decide you doing so well and you did 6 weeks of bf so well done.

If you want to continue to bf is there support you can access near you x

WaltzingWaters · 27/10/2023 07:57

I had constant problems with blocked ducts in the early stages of bf. I mean constant, one would go and I’d get another. I used soya lecithin supplements for a while and it thinned the milk and made a HUGE difference. Used them gradually reducing the quantity for a few months and still bf now at 19 months, I’ve had no issues since those first few months.

Of course you can stop whenever you want to. Just giving this as an option as it made all the difference to me and allowed me to continue.

Sometimeswinning · 27/10/2023 08:00

Parker231 · 27/10/2023 07:21

The poster is asking for advice on how to stop bf with painful mastitis. How in the world do you think telling her about your perfect prep machine and where you get your formula from will help??

terraced · 27/10/2023 08:01

Stop when you want to. I stopped at 3 days and bottle fed.

scrantonelectriccity · 27/10/2023 08:04

DustyLee123 · 27/10/2023 07:17

this is terrible advice!

Parker231 · 27/10/2023 08:04

Sometimeswinning · 27/10/2023 08:00

The poster is asking for advice on how to stop bf with painful mastitis. How in the world do you think telling her about your perfect prep machine and where you get your formula from will help??

Show quote history

Because she mentions that she has never bottle fed and doesn’t know where to start.

Doingmybest12 · 27/10/2023 08:05

Sometimeswinning · 27/10/2023 08:00

The poster is asking for advice on how to stop bf with painful mastitis. How in the world do you think telling her about your perfect prep machine and where you get your formula from will help??

Show quote history

The op did say she's never used bottles before abd doesn't know where to start. So snappy.

BubziOwl · 27/10/2023 08:06

@Sometimeswinning the OP clearly also says she has no idea where to start with FF, which I imagine is why that PP has given FF advice.

scrantonelectriccity · 27/10/2023 08:10

Similarly to you OP I breastfed my first until 19 months with no problems, my second baby I had mastitis twice in the first few weeks and was constantly engorged and had blocked ducts, massive oversupply and was close to giving up a few times. The HV said it's common second time round especially if there wasn't a huge gap between stopping breastfeeding your first and starting feeding the second (not sure how true that is)

Things got much much easier for me after about 7/8 weeks and everything settled down, my supply calmed down and I've had no problems since.

I would see how you feel once you're recovered from the mastitis as you don't want to make the decision to stop because you're feeling ill then regret it once you're feeling better, your supply will settle very soon and things will hopefully get easier

If not then please don't just stop and never express or touch your boobs as a poster suggested, that's just asking for blocked ducts and more mastitis. Do it gradually

Sometimeswinning · 27/10/2023 08:12

Doingmybest12 · 27/10/2023 08:05

The op did say she's never used bottles before abd doesn't know where to start. So snappy.

Show quote history

Oh I see. Half asleep and couldn’t understand why people were giving advice on ff and not helping her with her mastitis or how to correctly stop. I see now. Still think people who have experience should probably give advice on stopping first before the perfect prep brigade rock up!

Original poster

Mum2HC · 27/10/2023 08:12

Thank you, this sounds just like me. How did you stop it coming back for a third time?
I just feel so nervous about every decision. My dream would be to carry on feeding and never get mastitis again but I just can’t see this happening 😭

OP posts:

MammaTo · 27/10/2023 08:17

Oh bless you. You question yourself so much when you’ve had a baby. I got too nervous to BF and just FF from the start and when the baby got it’s first cold i sobbed thinking it wouldn’t of happened if I BF, when in reality he’d been to his first baby group class and was bound to pick something up at some point. But I’ve got a thriving 10 month old who’s hitting milestones so don’t feel guilty for FF if you think it’s going to help you.

Iwasafool · 27/10/2023 08:18

I'm old and advice changes but the old way to reduce milk was to take Epsom salts. I also produced lots of milk and that was the advice back then, I'm talking the 70s. It may be a no no now so I'd research it a bit before trying it.

Mastitis is horrible, all these years later I remember how awful it was and I only had it once. Do take things slowly as you reduce. Hope you get it resolved.

MigGirl · 27/10/2023 08:20

https://www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk/

Contact these guys, they will help you in what ever form you want. But don't just stop if you have mastitis this is never good advice.

Also when you say you have seen a lactation consultant who was this person do you know what training they have had (Some BfN trained supporters have more experience and training then some lactation consultants as it's not a medically protected profession). Did they watch a whole feed from start to finish, has you baby been checked for tounge tie? Tonge tie can cause problems bottle feeding to so it's important to get it checked out.

The BfN can also give you information on how bottle feeding works as they are trained to do so. So it's definitely worth seeking support.

National Breastfeeding Helpline – Helpline

https://www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk

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