To think dance isn't a girly thing?

[lizrta]

I'm in a mum's fb group and there's a woman on there who has said the following about primary aged boys doing dance lessons:

^"This isn’t going to be a surprise , I can’t fucking stand it. It’s just encouraging them to go against their gender and be DifFErENT

Before you’re like it’s 2023??? You’re the only one who thinks this

LOLLL

At DC's show, when the boy came on stage I could see all the parents/grandparents looking at each other like what the actual fuck

A family I was sat next too was muttering under their breath

It’s ridiculous. Nobody wants to see it. Shouldn’t be a thing"^

My little boy dances and I know others that do. It never crossed my mind as being weird?!

Thoughts?

It's true that dance is usually more popular with girls than boys but that doesn't mean no boys are interested in it. Do they also say that girls don't play football I wonder? They sound like narrow minded fools.

Has she ever heard of Strictly? I’m sure I’ve seen some men dancing on there, they were boys at some point. I can’t believe in 2023 we’re still having the boy/ girl thing conversations. People enjoy doing people things.

My eldest dances, most men would kill for his muscles!

My nephews son went to a dance school as a child. Hes now a professional dancer and has performed in many stage productions, and has appeared in West End musicals.
No he's not gay x

My DD attended a Performing Arts sixth form college. I would say the split was 60/40 girls/ boys. It would never occur to me that dancing is not for boys.

These people are prats. Don't let them bother you, dancers are fit and strong people, and it's good for your son.

And (perhaps a little off topic) did nobody else find, in their youth, that the guy who was willing to really dance (as opposed to just twitch to the music) and do so with pleasure with you when the really great song was played at a party immediately became infinitely more sexy? (As opposed to the chap who grudgingly gets on the floor and is scared stiff of moving his hips!) Oh, if men only knew . . . .

Some of the best ballet dancers in the history of ballet have been men. Dancing is not a ‘girly’ thing by any stretch of the imagination.

Absolutely this.

Absolutely this, it kind of let you see what was to come 😳 so to speak.

Offer to go with her to see Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake.

Honestly op she's an idiot. Probably a closet homophobic one given a lot of the anti-men dancing seems to be about only gay men doing it. Ha!

It's sexist, playing to stereotypes, but incredibly common. Don't look only to people who agree with whether it's girly or not but actual behaviour. Many blokes will tell you it's not girly, but but they'll be aware of that view when deciding whether they're interested or not. It's probably a big part of why I didn't growing up

I only got interested as a grown up in my 40s, and experience and other people tell me of the sex bias in terms of attendees. Going to social dancing classes I was almost never without a partner, while women have to periodically wait during rotations and partner swapping.

Always loved moving to music, so really it makes no sense that it took until my 40s to learn a proper style of dancing. I think it's much better moving with a partner than solo

YANBU, not one bit.

Scratch the surface just a tiny little bit, and homophobia is right there, alive and kicking.

I used to work at a premier league football academy. The footballers had ballet lessons.

Of course it's not. My son is loves to dance and will be enrolled in classes as soon as he reaches the age limit of the nearest one! :)

Surely traditionally dance involves both men and women?

They’d probably be the same people complaining if two women dance together on strictly

Girly like this? Matthew Ball of the Royal Ballet.
https://www.mattyball.co.uk/kosmas-pavlos

Has she never heard of Patrick Swayze?

My son has danced since age 4 (now 16). Every year when he took his grade exams the examiner would tell him how much the ballet would help him with his football - I assume to encourage him to continue. Funny thing is he hates football and won't play, he dances because he wants to dance.

Anyway OP YANBU but it's really common. What used to make me sad was the mums who whispered to me that their sons would love to try dance but their husbands wouldn't allow it. I think it's homophobia rather that "just" sexism.
Edited to remove random emoji

Yanbu. Reminds me of the weird poster who said on another thread that she'd 'never allow' her sons to do gymnastics because it's for girls.

I used to love to dance, back in the day. Has the woman mentioned in the original post never heard of Rudolph Nureyev, or Mikhail Barishnikov, not to mention Michael Flatley, Michael Jackson, John Travolta, Patrick Swaze.

Or watch some old movies... who is doing the war dance around the fire in old westerns?

She’s a knob. My DS6 is a mullet wearing rugby league player and does dance class. Because he loves both.
Some people are arseholes, long as the kids are feeling joy then what’s the issue really.

Absolute weirdos. Must be sad to be so narrow minded that you arent even aware there are male dancers starring in dance shows nationally and internationally. I suppose they think men didnt dance as boys, just magicked into dance artistes at age 25 or so. It bemuses me when people are proud of being dense.

Friend owns a string of dance studios . Very inclusive, encourages everyone to come along. She has told me that boys comprise only about 5% of her classes at primary age, and when they get to secondary the figures are around 1%.It's a pity but that's how it is.

It’s likely a mix of sexism and homophobia, ‘girly’ things are inferior to ‘boys’ things and a boy lowering himself to girly things must be gay, because a proper boy or man wouldn’t lower himself to something girly.

Our eight year old son does ballet and rugby, I’ve had people ask if I’m worried if being a ballet dancer will “make him, you know” all the more awkward as they mean gay but can’t quite bring themselves to say that to me. If you could make someone gay, surely it would be something like rugby does that we’re you’re literally wrestling men and showering with them, rather than dancing with girls who are outfits that are fairly revealing.