Even as adults?
Parents separated when I was a child. I will preface this by saying I mean in cases where there has not been abuse! Of course I understand not wanting to see your abuser. When my parents split it was not to do with abuse on either side. There was an affair which is obviously not good and hurtful to the other which I understand.
But I'm very fed up still as an adult that my parents cannot simply move on. I have two children now of my own and I am so tired of them still being unable to hold a simple conversation enough to not make birthday parties or family events awkward. I am sick of trying to please both and having to live separate lives with them individually. They won't even do something as simple as hand over my children to the other for example or come to my home to wish my children a happy birthday at the same time etc.
It has been nearly 20 years!
I appreciate I have the ability of saying this is what's happening come or don't, which I have started doing now but it still makes me mad that they'd rather but their children (me and siblings) and their grandchildren now too in the awkward position of just not being able to simply have their two parents or grandparents stand in the same room and sing happy birthday or whatever.
AIBU to think this is really shitty and unreasonable when you share children together to not just move on for the rest of the families sake, especially young children?
Me and DH are rocky ourselves at the moment and there have been times when his behaviour has seriously made me hate him but I can't imagine ever wanting to put my kids in this situation and would always, I hope, try my best to just smile and get on with it for their sakes.