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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To throw colleague under a bus?!

57 replies

justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 15:50

New colleague. Technically senior to me, and clearly trying to assert dominance in a number of ways. We have a very flat organisation generally, and outside of who you report to, there is no real seniority day to day.

Last week I made a minor error - basically, I got person x to proof read something for me, they missed a mistake and I sent it out. I corrected it and followed up as soon as it was noticed - about 15 minutes after sending.

New colleague told my boss and other members of team about this error.

The reason I didn't get new colleague to proof read is he was offline and had told me, off the record, he was finishing early to make the most of the nice weather and go for a walk at a local beauty spot.

It's been raised by my manager who "wants a chat about it". Do I smile sweetly, nod, promise to never do it again. Or do I drop new colleague in it and explain why I didn't get him to proof read?

You are being unreasonable = Just smile sweetly and shut up
You are NOT being unreasonable = Hell yeah drop him in it

OP posts:
shatteredL · 24/10/2023 15:51

I'd be thinking fuck them and grass them however, if you don't have proof like an email, text, teams message etc then I wouldn't bother as they might accuse you of trying to cause shit

Trenda · 24/10/2023 15:53

Cant you just say the truth? He was offline and couldn't be reached in the working day. You don't have to extrapolate from that but the manager might ...

jenny38 · 24/10/2023 15:54

Drop him in it.

doubleshotcappuccino · 24/10/2023 15:54

Definitely would say what actually happened or this will happen again

SwiftieGrainger · 24/10/2023 15:55

Its not throwing them under the bus it's true! I had something similar at work years ago, bit my tongue and colleague just got worse and caused people loads of issues. I regretted protecting them, what a twat he sounds.

Pheasantplucker2 · 24/10/2023 15:55

I would say "So sorry, totally my fault and I appreciate that more eyes the better in these situations. Next time something needs proofreading, I will ask X to do it. I would have asked him to do it this time, but he was offline and not able to be reached." Totally true, you're not saying why, but the manager can then ask him.

justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 15:55

shatteredL · 24/10/2023 15:51

I'd be thinking fuck them and grass them however, if you don't have proof like an email, text, teams message etc then I wouldn't bother as they might accuse you of trying to cause shit

I wouldn't do it "officially", just a light hearted comment when explaining what happened. We're a small, very chilled organisation, and it's not something my boss would normally "have a chat" over without pressure. It's not happened repeatedly, and is a total one off.

OP posts:
Wonkasworld · 24/10/2023 15:56

Easy answer, look after you, nobody else.

Sconehenge · 24/10/2023 15:57

I wouldn’t say that he’d said he was off early, I would just say he was offline so you asked someone else.

Skeuomorph · 24/10/2023 15:57

So you created the document and you sent it so you had two opportunities to spot this error?

Honestly, I think you need to take accountability for your error. Blaming him for not being available to proofread will only make you look childish, and will reiterate why you need your work checked.

Riva5784 · 24/10/2023 15:59

New colleague had no qualms about pointing out your mistake to all and sundry, no need to protect this person. Be honest with your boss.

CryptoFascist · 24/10/2023 16:02

He didn't worry about dropping you in it, did he?

As PP have said, just explain you would have asked him to proofread but he was offline.

SOBplus · 24/10/2023 16:08

So it was your mistake, and you want to share blame to ... what, minimize fallout? Do they read everything you do to look for mistakes or trust you to do your work competently on your own? I would suggest, own the mistake and move on, there is no upside to looking petty.

YaWeeFurryBastard · 24/10/2023 16:11

It was your mistake and nothing to do with your new colleague, especially given you managed to get someone else to do it. If you try and blame this on him you’ll look absolutely unhinged. We all make mistakes just chalk it up to experience and move on.

itsgoingtobeabumpyride · 24/10/2023 16:22

A mistake is exactly that, a mistake.
Your proof reader also made a mistake.
We all make mistakes.
In my organisation the attitude would be "oh you made a mistake but you've rectified it, no harm done, now can you help me with. . . ."
Or
"What?? Don't worry about it"
Your new colleague is trying to make their mark at your expense.
I would definitely tell the truth
"I apologise for the mistake, I rectified it as soon as I realised. I should have sent it to X for checking but they had gone for a walk to Y so were off line. Next time Z needs checking I'll wait for X to get back"
Don't cover up for them, they don't have your back, don't have theirs

CaineRaine · 24/10/2023 16:28

Skeuomorph · 24/10/2023 15:57

So you created the document and you sent it so you had two opportunities to spot this error?

Honestly, I think you need to take accountability for your error. Blaming him for not being available to proofread will only make you look childish, and will reiterate why you need your work checked.

This for me, you need to take accountability for your mistake. If you flag the fact your colleague wasn’t around to proofread, you’re implying they would have picked up your error if they had been - and reinforcing the point you need your work checked.

verdantverdure · 24/10/2023 16:31

Just tell the truth.

Echio · 24/10/2023 16:36

Go in open minded - boss might well want to talk to you more about your working relationship with this new person than the mistake itself (and they may well be thinking, you usually are a good employee and colleagues are all supportive, so is there an issue with the new chap?)

JaxiiTaxii · 24/10/2023 16:38

Yeah he's a massive twat if he deliberately pointed out the mistake.

But unless his job is proof reader of your documents, not sure what difference it made that he was offline?
Did you make the mistake or did he?

Take responsibility for your own mistakes seperately to dealing with his snakey behaviour, because it looks childish.

But I'd be EXTREMELY careful blabbing about him skipping off early if it's something you or other colleagues potentially also benefit from on occasion. Nobodys going to thank you for grassing & the boss bringing in some Draconian checking in system.

justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 16:51

SOBplus · 24/10/2023 16:08

So it was your mistake, and you want to share blame to ... what, minimize fallout? Do they read everything you do to look for mistakes or trust you to do your work competently on your own? I would suggest, own the mistake and move on, there is no upside to looking petty.

New colleague trying to prove how very important and needed they are - so yes, they are requesting they proof reading everything at the moment as "they have the expertise" in this area.

OP posts:
justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 16:52

Skeuomorph · 24/10/2023 15:57

So you created the document and you sent it so you had two opportunities to spot this error?

Honestly, I think you need to take accountability for your error. Blaming him for not being available to proofread will only make you look childish, and will reiterate why you need your work checked.

Proof reading my own stuff is so difficult. I have minor neurological issues, which are public knowledge with my colleagues, and so I do always get anything that goes outside the company proofread - normally by colleague x. Unfortunately they also didn't spot the issue.

OP posts:
WeWereInParis · 24/10/2023 16:53

I do always get anything that goes outside the company proofread - normally by colleague x

Sorry, maybe I missed it, if colleague x normally proof-reads, why would you need to explain why you didn't ask new colleague to proof-read?

justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 16:55

Echio · 24/10/2023 16:36

Go in open minded - boss might well want to talk to you more about your working relationship with this new person than the mistake itself (and they may well be thinking, you usually are a good employee and colleagues are all supportive, so is there an issue with the new chap?)

That could be true. There are a number of toes being trodden on at the moment! Just a clash in (working) culture that will pass, but other colleagues may have spoken to my manager about it.

OP posts:
justteanbiscuits · 24/10/2023 16:55

WeWereInParis · 24/10/2023 16:53

I do always get anything that goes outside the company proofread - normally by colleague x

Sorry, maybe I missed it, if colleague x normally proof-reads, why would you need to explain why you didn't ask new colleague to proof-read?

Because new colleague wants to proof read everything!

OP posts:
Namddf · 24/10/2023 16:56

I don’t get it. Surely the error was made by colleague x, who proofread the document? That’s why you asked them to proofread it, surely?

Why are you even being blamed for this? The person who failed to spot the error is at fault.