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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To question if sill likes me?

2 replies

sillibilli2 · 23/10/2023 14:09

I have know sil and bil 15 years. Before we all had kids we would just see them a mils one or twice a month. After kids we still all get together at mils but sometimes sil and I will meet at a soft play or park. My ds is6 and sil dd is 4. They don't get on great as they clash a lot (ds has asd and likes to play alone a lot whereas dn is very social) but we still try to encourage them to get on as we all spend lots of time together.

This year it feels like sil has cooled off, it's generally me who suggested meeting up, she usually suggests Halloween and Xmas activities to do together (typically 3 or 4)but she hasn't this year.

I suggested a Xmas activity and she said she would book (it's very popular so sells quick) but she hasn't booked.

I then suggested a meet up at a soft play. We usually go to one near her (about a 40min drive for me) but I suggested one closer to me as I was push for time. She agreed but then complained when she realised how far it was (40 min) and wanted to change to the one near her.

We had agreed to meet in half term , I was working tues, wed and her thurs Fri so we said Monday. I found an activity near her but when I messaged she said she had plans and suggested a day I was working.

I just feel like she cba anymore. We haven't fell out and I would say kids are getting on better this year than last few. So I don't understand why.

Am I being sensitive or is she not bothered?

OP posts:
AdultingIncorrectly · 23/10/2023 18:00

Maybe her DD has new friends that she gets on with and who want to play with her?
They are different sex/ages and are probably into quite different things. It’s quite heartbreaking to see your DC be shunned/rejected or argued with when you’ve forced two kids together for the sake of a cuppa with the other parent. It doesn’t mean SIL doesn’t like you, it just sounds like it would be a lot of hard work for not much reward tbh. Don’t take it personally, the DC will probably get on like a house on fire in a couple of years.

sillibilli2 · 23/10/2023 19:47

Yeah good point. I guess I like the meeting up as it's nice to have a bit of company but yeah her dd has started school so probably more op's with school friends.

OP posts:
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