To go to the pub by myself

[User65412]

I am from and live in a small town. I used to work in most of the pubs so everyone knows me and I know most people.
I also grew up in a pub so feel very at home in one!
My dh and I used to go together but now we have 3 small DC so life is just hectic.
A friend asked me to meet for a drink tonight but can't make it now. DH has had a long work week so as soon as the kids are down he's heading to bed. I was looking forward to a bit of social interaction so might just go anyway. The pub is about 200m from my house, very small village local where I know everyone. I feel fine about it but having done it once before I felt kinda judged by a couple of people. Like you're by yourself? Is your marriage ok? Are you struggling? Men go to the pub by themselves all the time but I feel like people think it's weird if a woman does it?
I just want a nice cold glass of wine after a rough week! Would probably have 2 then come home.
Would you judge me?

Wish it was something more women did as I do genuinely enjoy chatting to people but think if you don't have a cosy local where you'll know at least a handful of people i think id be viewed as odd!

I go to the pub by myself every week for a couple of hours while my dd is at a drama class, never occurred to me what anyone else is thinking - I doubt anyone cares. Enjoy!

You’ve inspired me. There’s a lovely looking pub opposite ds gymnastics class. I’m going to bring a book next week and have a pint instead of sitting in the cold back room (I don’t drive). I’ve been anxious about walking in by myself up to now but my knee jerk reaction to your post and the comments have made me see how silly I’m being! Enjoy your wine op xxx

but I always think if I go to the pub everyone will think I've been stood up and pity me
Why would anyone think anything about you?
People would barely notice your presence let alone give you a thought. Why would they?

One of my great pleasures is taking myself off for the day on my own to walk around a new place and rewarding myself with a pint or glass of wine in a pub at the end of the day.

I sat in a pub alone for an hour earlier waiting for my train. It was totally fine. Everyone is too absorbed in themselves and their conversations to give a hoot.

I go to the pub all the time on my own. I've met some of my closest friends at a pub. And some of my previous boyfriends, some of whom I'm still friends with.

I've never had any weird looks or that.

Go! Since becoming a single parent, I've had to adjust to doing things alone and although going to a pub alone isn't something I would think to do - I definitely would! And now you've raised it, I think I will.

As others have said, no one will even notice you being alone let alone judge. I say that, as I 100% understand how you feel. I would feel exactly the same but I do also tell myself that in the kindest possible way, literally no one gives a shit.

Enjoy your wine! I'm having a crappy night (going through a breakup) but my lovely brother has sent me some wine on deliveroo (DD4 in bed so can't go out) so I'm enjoying that instead. Hope you have a lovely evening x

100% do it.
I have started doing it more since a friend got plastered and left me all alone on a night out. I carried on and was talking to so many lovely people in different pubs. Had a brilliant time. Have fun!

Crack on!

Sounds lovely. I would if I were you and sit at the bar if you fancy a chat with the bar person or bring your phone or a book if you don't. Change of scenery is good for you!

It's very sexist but you're right that women might get judged as being mateless, on the pull or having been stood up but I'm sure you don't give a hoot nor should you x

So what if they do?

I have occasionally gone to the pub alone. And the cinema, restaurants, anything really.. it wouldn't occur to me that someone would think I was stood up. If they thought about me at all I'd expect they would think I'm someone confident enough to go to the pub alone and that would be it!

I don't have many reasons to go to the pub on my own, but one evening I locked myself out of the house and couldn't get hold of my husband straight away.

I went to a nearby pub and stayed there for several hours until I could get back into my house.

Nobody cared. It was fine.

It never would have occurred to me not to go into the pub.